Welcome back to the peripheral and happy new year. We all have our new year's resolutions. What is a resolution? It's something you want to change about your life, yourself, something you want to do differently. Maybe it's seeing the world in a better light. It's doing something for yourself, setting a boundary, exercising, eating better, or stopping a bad habit.But all of those things are a transition. All of those things are a conscious decision that you want to make to be more true to yourself. On today's episode, I speak with Holden a trans man who knew they were in the wrong body from a young age.Visit us online.

The holidays are typically about family, togetherness and celebration. On today’s episode I speak with Kim who went through one of the worst tragedies a parent could go through. I want encourage anyone who is spending the holidays alone to reach out, make a phone call, accept that invite and know that you are loved and there are others who can relate to what you’ve been through.Amber Morrow's life was filled with a dream to teach and uplift children. To honor her memory and keep her aspirations alive, the Amber Morrow Memorial Scholarship was established. This annual scholarship supports a high school senior who shares Amber's passion for helping children and is pursuing a related college major.Your contribution to this scholarship is more than a donation; it's a way to continue Amber's legacy of nurturing young minds. If Amber's story touches your heart and you wish to support this cause, you can send your contribution to the address below. Every donation helps keep Amber's spirit and dreams alive in future generations.Amber Morrow Memorial ScholarshipCommunity Foundation of Randolph County120 W Washington St, Winchester, IN 47394Visit The Peripheral online.

Welcome back to the peripheral, for every episode I put out I try to create this intro where I tell the audience a little about what my guest will be discussing just to give everyone a heads up. I feel that is the trigger warning if it’s a topic that sadly a lot of people have been through and might not want to hear or just be prepared before hearing about it. This episode I was at a complete lose for words. It’s about rape and that rape being recorded. I asked a few friends who gave me ideas and my friend Joe referenced another case that happened. I couldn’t remember all the details so we both searched online for it. After 30 mins of digging through hundreds of cases that involve rape being recorded and shared both Joe and I were horrified.Today I speak with the brave and wonderful Erika who recalls a traumatic event from high school where she was raped and then finds out there was video of the event.

...1 eerie corn maze......9 haunting figures......9 spine-tingling tales......Will YOU find your way out? This holiday season, step into a labyrinth of shadows and suspense with Shane Waters as your guide. In this chilling collaboration, you'll encounter the hosts of 9 acclaimed true crime podcasts, each offering a dark tale and a life lesson to send shivers down your spine. This is not just a special episode; it's an immersive journey through a maze of twisted paths and unsolved mysteries. So, lift your lantern high and venture into 'Maze of Secrets'... ...but be warned... ...not everyone makes it to the end… Prepare to get lost in the stories, but find yourself in their lessons. It's an odyssey of crime, mystery, and eerie life lessons that you won't soon forget. This is Shane’s 5th holiday collaboration. If you dare to walk this twisted path with us, you're in for a night you'll never forget. Are you ready? Podcasts are listed here in order of appearance: Frightful Marooned Rotten to the Core Murder, She Told Obscura Crimelines Once Upon a Crime The Trail Went Cold Foul Play: Crime Series Listen to the other holiday collaborations here.

Have you ever felt like you live a cursed life or that your family had a curse leveled upon them? We think lightning can’t strike twice but what if it does?  Today I speak with Janet who has suffered multiple tragic losses within her family.  With all of the loss she’s endured and health issues she’s experienced Janet assumed she or anyone within her vicinity would suffer a brutal fate.  Janet would find solace with her husband and eventually find out that her dark curse would have more scientific explanation. This would allow her to find closure and unlimited compassion for the rest of her life.

Foul Play: Crime Series is a narrated one case per season crime podcast appealing to your morbid and obsessed curiosity. If you need a suggestion for a season to start with - go with Season 15: My Aunt & The Hitman. Learn more at itsfoulplay.com

On today’s episode I decided to cover a story that was more lighthearted. I have some heavy topics coming up so I needed a break. Have you ever felt out of place? Decided to take a DNA test to find your roots and uncover a family secret that will turn your world upside down? Episode Sponsor: Head to FACTORMEALS.com/peripheral50 and use code peripheral50 to get 50% off.

On today’s episode I talk with DR. Shiloh and Dr. Scott who are Clinical Psychologists. I’ve interviewed experts in the past to gather more insight into topics that I myself may or may not have much knowledge on. We have a casual conversation about their journey’s to becoming psychologists and how they ended up working with law enforcement and providing treatment for sex offenders. I was fascinated by them and hope you check them out! ‌https://www.la-not-so-confidential.com/ Episode Sponsor: Head to FACTORMEALS.com/peripheral50 and use code peripheral50 to get 50% off.

On today's episode my guest talks about what it's like to have a family member struggling with delusional parasitosis. This is a mental condition where a person feels and sees insects or worms crawling under their skin. This can lead to self mutilation and permanent disfigurement. The intention of this episode is to educate and inquire for help or suggestions from others. If they've even had to care for an adult family member suffering with delusions or extreme mental impairment and how to lead them to help. Episode Sponsor: Head to Factormeals.com/peripheral50 and use code peripheral50 to get 50% off.

On this episode I speak with Brandon about his younger brother Elliot. Elliot’s life, influence on the world around him and sadly his death. Brandon is a song writer and music producer in which he shares his dreams and struggles through. Music was always a huge part of my life and relationship with my siblings much like Brandon and Elliot. Brandon had wanted to share his brother’s story for a long time and after hearing me talk about my sister’s death, I’m honored that he felt this was the right place to talk about it. Tiktok- @hiphophush Insta- @hiphophush FB- Hush Youtube- https://youtube.com/@hiphophush Bandcamp- Hush And here's the spotify link to the record but it's on all platforms if people search for "Hush, us"

Today I speak with Clancy Martin about his new book and the topic of suicide. Clancy’s book How Not to Kill Yourself is a very stark yet uplifting journey through Clancy’s attempts, different types of self destruction and how other cultures view suicide.  I ask Clancy about different aspects of his life and how he  overcome a lifetime of suicidal ideation and how others can to. ‌If you’re in crisis please reach out or make a call for help: https://findahelpline.com/gb/topics/suicidal-thoughts https://988lifeline.org/

On this week’s episode I speak with Katie who from a early age realized she needed something more when it came to sexual gratification. As with most of us, it takes years to figure out who we are and what we want. For Katie that something was pain.

Jinkies! Welcome to the Mystery Inc podcast, where we unmask the truth behind the spookiest mysteries!  In this episode, we're tackling the mystery at Airtight Bridge in Illinois. It's a place with a dark past, where strange things have been happening for decades. People have reported seeing ghostly figures walking along the bridge, strange noises, and even unexplainable accidents. Taking us on this spooky adventure are brother hosts, Shane and Josh Waters. They're experts in all things mystery, and they're not afraid of a little paranormal.  So grab your Scooby Snacks, turn off the lights, and join us on the Mystery Inc podcast. Who knows what we might find? Zoinks! You can find Mystery Inc here: Website, Apple, Spotify

On todays episode I speak with Matthew who at 40 had a life altering event. He collapse onto the floor at work and work up in a daze at a hospital. Once the drugs had worn off and he was back on his feet, that daze would turn into a new perspective on life that he tried to explain to others but to no avail. So he decided to put pen to paper and write a book. Song - Open Heart Closed by Matthew David His book No Dreaming Allowed

On Today's episode I speak with Kevin who experienced one of the worst loses a father can suffer. As most of us know the opioid/heroin epidemic has truly left no one untouched, even those we would consider the "most unlikely suspects". Kevin leads us down a road no parent wants to take and the path back to the light. https://brookeshouse.org Episode Sponsor: Go to HelloFresh.com/peripheral60 and use code peripheral60 for 60% off plus free shipping

On Today's episode I speak with Mike who's a recovering alcoholic. Mike paints a clear picture of how far alcoholism can drag you down and what happens when you have an addiction with depression. You do things you're not proud of, you burn bridges, destroy relationships and make so many bad decisions that you can feel like you're drowning in regret. Mike was able to finally recognize his problem and refocus on the things that brought joy and passion into his life. Episode Sponsor: -Go to HelloFresh.com/peripheral65 and use code peripheral65 for 65% off plus free shipping!

Jackie was a hard-working single mom who was frustrated with the dating scene, but decided to give things another try.  She'll be introduced to the quintessential "nice guy"... things seemed to be going well, until they moved in together.  What Jackie thought were "pink flags" turned out to be something much more sinister.  How well do you really know your significant other? http://www.thegildedrosestudio.com/ Episode Sponsor: Go to HelloFresh.com/peripheral21 and use code peripheral21 for 21 free meals plus free shipping!

Today I speak with two amazing and strong mothers. They both went through pregnancies' where everything that could go wrong, went wrong. We cover the lack of communication and aftercare they both experienced along with topics such as PPD, PPA, PTSD and the death of a child. http://www.thegildedrosestudio.com/ Visit us online.  Episode Sponsors: Storyworth - Help your family share their story this holiday season with StoryWorth. Go to StoryWorth.com/Peripheral today and save $10 on your first purchase! Wondery Exhibit C - Join the Exhibit C online community at Wonderyexhibitc.com

As most of you know when I started the peripheral I wasn’t trying to do another true crime podcast. It was more of an attempt to shine a light on things that affect most of us everyday and even aspects of true crime that get glossed over. That said, on today’s episode I speak with James and Sandman who lost a brother and a friend in a tragic and abrupt manner that most of us luckily never have to experience. Doug lived in a nice town, was well liked and also sold  marijuana. He was murdered in his home during a home invasion with a half dozen witnesses yet his murder remains unsolved to this day.

…1 campfire… …1 dark forest… …31 bone-chilling stories… …Will YOU survive the night? This Halloween season, enter the woods for a unique and truly epic podcast experience! Around the campfire Shane Waters will introduce 31 crime podcast hosts, including Justin at The Peripheral. Each host brings a new, nerve-wracking true story to the circle. It’s an extra special, two part, five-hour, Halloween event, but before hitting play you might want to ask yourself…can you really handle this much murder and mayhem? So, pull up to the fire and brace yourself for ‘A Nightmare Before Halloween’ …but be warned… …bad things happen in these woods…. Podcasts are listed here in order of appearance: In this Part 2 Episode: - True Crime Island [https://tinyurl.com/y6kk2npj] - Based on a True Story [https://tinyurl.com/37axzn5z] - The Asian Madness Podcast [https://tinyurl.com/yckkxbjn] - Sistas Who Kill [https://linktr.ee/Sistas.Who.Kill.Podcast] - Hometown History [https://link.chtbl.com/hometownhistory] - Coffee and Cases [https://linktr.ee/coffeeandcases] - Military Murder [https://tinyurl.com/yc5fxjyh] - Dystopian Simulation Radio [https://tinyurl.com/khpw786w] - Cults, Crimes & Cabernet [https://linktr.ee/cultscrimesandcabernet] - Morbidology [https://tinyurl.com/mshyvxyt] - Dark Pountine [https://tinyurl.com/ycydanm9] - Hillbilly Horror Stories [https://tinyurl.com/567vxrkz] - True Consequences [https://tinyurl.com/39fpfv3h] - Gone Cold [https://tinyurl.com/ytzxudt8] - Crime Stories with Nancy Grace & Crime Online [https://tinyurl.com/3dxp47wf] - True Crime IRL & True Crime Sleep Stories [https://tinyurl.com/ykzwmnxr] In the last Part 1 Episode: - Foul Play: Crime Series [https://link.chtbl.com/foulplay] - Murder She Told [https://tinyurl.com/55473exk] - Crime Salad [https://tinyurl.com/4pbtdtpc] - Crimelines [https://linktr.ee/crimelines] - Frightful [https://link.chtbl.com/frightful] - Reverie True Crime [https://linktr.ee/paigeelmore] - Rotten to the Core [https://link.chtbl.com/Rotten] - The Trail Went Cold [https://tinyurl.com/2zydj3y] - Once Upon A Crime [https://www.truecrimepodcast.com] - Criminology [https://tinyurl.com/yvuu9u8d] - The Peripheral & Generation Why [https://link.chtbl.com/ThePeripheral] - Live, Laugh, Larceny [https://linktr.ee/Live.Laugh.Larceny.Podcast] - The Hidden Staircase [https://link.chtbl.com/TheHiddenStaircase] - True Crime Cases with Lanie & It's Haunted...What Now? [https://linktr.ee/LanieHobbs] - Obscura: A True Crime Podcast & Disaster [https://link.chtbl.com/obscura]

…1 campfire… …1 dark forest… …31 bone-chilling stories… …Will YOU survive the night? This Halloween season, enter the woods for a unique and truly epic podcast experience! Around the campfire Shane Waters will introduce 31 crime podcast hosts, including Justin at The Peripheral. Each host brings a new, nerve-wracking true story to the circle. It’s an extra special, two part, five-hour, Halloween event, but before hitting play you might want to ask yourself…can you really handle this much murder and mayhem? So, pull up to the fire and brace yourself for ‘A Nightmare Before Halloween’ …but be warned… …bad things happen in these woods…. Podcasts are listed here in order of appearance: In this Part 1 Episode: - Foul Play: Crime Series [https://link.chtbl.com/foulplay] - Murder She Told [https://tinyurl.com/55473exk] - Crime Salad [https://tinyurl.com/4pbtdtpc] - Crimelines [https://linktr.ee/crimelines] - Frightful [https://link.chtbl.com/frightful] - Reverie True Crime [https://linktr.ee/paigeelmore] - Rotten to the Core [https://link.chtbl.com/Rotten] - The Trail Went Cold [https://tinyurl.com/2zydj3y] - Once Upon A Crime [https://www.truecrimepodcast.com] - Criminology [https://tinyurl.com/yvuu9u8d] - The Peripheral & Generation Why [https://link.chtbl.com/ThePeripheral] - Live, Laugh, Larceny [https://linktr.ee/Live.Laugh.Larceny.Podcast] - The Hidden Staircase [https://link.chtbl.com/TheHiddenStaircase] - True Crime Cases with Lanie & It's Haunted...What Now? [https://linktr.ee/LanieHobbs] - Obscura: A True Crime Podcast & Disaster [https://link.chtbl.com/obscura] In the next Part 2 Episode: - True Crime Island [https://tinyurl.com/y6kk2npj] - Based on a True Story [https://tinyurl.com/37axzn5z] - The Asian Madness Podcast [https://tinyurl.com/yckkxbjn] - Sistas Who Kill [https://linktr.ee/Sistas.Who.Kill.Podcast] - Hometown History [https://link.chtbl.com/hometownhistory] - Coffee and Cases [https://linktr.ee/coffeeandcases] - Military Murder [https://tinyurl.com/yc5fxjyh] - Dystopian Simulation Radio [https://tinyurl.com/khpw786w] - Cults, Crimes & Cabernet [https://linktr.ee/cultscrimesandcabernet] - Morbidology [https://tinyurl.com/mshyvxyt] - Dark Pountine [https://tinyurl.com/ycydanm9] - Hillbilly Horror Stories [https://tinyurl.com/567vxrkz] - True Consequences [https://tinyurl.com/39fpfv3h] - Gone Cold [https://tinyurl.com/ytzxudt8] - Crime Stories with Nancy Grace & Crime Online [https://tinyurl.com/3dxp47wf] - True Crime IRL & True Crime Sleep Stories [https://tinyurl.com/ykzwmnxr]

Chris joins us today on the peripheral to talk about his struggle with manic depression and schizoaffective disorder. Chris describes hallucinations and the voices he hears. We discuss his medications and I share some experiences I’ve had with bad reactions to medications also. Chris really hammers home that there is help out there and even in the darkest of times you can find it. Episode Sponsor: Get your first EveryPlate box for only $1.49 per meal by going to everyplace.com and entering promo code peripheral149 The Peripheral can be found on all podcasting outlets here: https://link.chtbl.com/ThePeripheral All episodes of The Peripheral can now be found ad-free on Apple Podcasts

On this episode of The Peripheral I speak with Shane and Brent about a troubling situation. Brent was single at the time and trying out the dating world when he was contacted by someone who he thought was a perfect match. Brent will end up being catfished for months.. and then everything gets much worse. Please check out the Foul Play: Crime Series podcast - the season is called Making a Predator to hear a deep dive into this outrageous story. You can find it here: https://link.chtbl.com/foulplay

Welcome to The Peripheral

The nice ones. Being nice and compassionate is what I strive for. If only coming from a place of caring or understanding came from both sides. Sadly us nice ones can be taken advantage of, walked over and even targets for abuse. Abuse comes in many shapes and forms, it's not always physical. If you're listening to this and hear any similarity in your relationship, whether that's controlling, belittling or just someone taking advantage of your living situation or financials. Please know that what you're going through is not right and these are not the traits of a healthy relationship. If you know someone who is in a similar situation, please feel free to forward this episode to them. Maybe it'll help someone understand they're not alone and see abuse for what it is.

On today's episode I'm joined by Sam who has struggled with her eating disorder since she was 10 years old. Having been in and out of treatment facilities and going through seperation with her husband, her disorder spiraled bringing her to the brink of death.  One last drive, one last push, one last attempt along with lots love and support she was able to break the chain.  www.nationaleatingdisorders.org/ Hotline 800.931.2237 www.nimh.nih.gov/health/topics/eating-disorders Feel free to reach out to Sam https://www.instagram.com/livingpeachydeath/ peachydeath@gmail.com

On this week's episode I speak with Ashley, who talks about repeatedly crossing paths with the person she would fall in love with.  What she didn't understand: these paths were actually railroad tracks, and she was about to be hit by a train.  She describes her struggles with finding places to live, with helping others, and how her giving and generous nature made her a target.  Ashley is now a survivor, and is stronger than ever. 

On this episode of The Peripheral I speak with Sara, who lost her brother to heroin.  We talk about what it's like to watch a sibling's life disintegrate in front of you, how hard it can be to relate to what they're going through. If you know someone who is struggling, know that they aren't intentionally trying to hurt you.  Please visit these support groups for family members of addicts. nar-anon.og Al-anon.org  

We all have our idea of the perfect relationship and what we look for in one partner. We follow social constructs that tell us who to love, how to love, and how many we can fall in love with. What if you meet several perfect partners at the same time? My guest Josie disregards the "rules" while making her own when it comes to love and relationships.   

According to the National Center for Victims of Crime, almost 90,000 cases of child sexual abuse are reported each year. Countless incidents go unreported, and 96 percent of these children are abused by someone they know and trust. In this episode, my guests discuss what it's like to be young teens, the older men they were with and the manipulation they went through. First interview with Rosie from Voice of the Victim. She talks about the grooming process and the effects it had on her. My second guest Cara (starts at 23mins) talks about a relationship an 18 year old started with her when she was around 13 years old. My third guest Tiffany (starts at 1 hour 17mins) was targeted by a family friend who hides behind his membership in the Mormon church. Her parents handle the discovery of this abuse in sharply contrasting ways, adding to her fear and shame.   

Trauma suffered during childhood can follow us through life, molding our behaviors and relationships. Today's guest Melissa talks about sexual abuse and the ripple effects that have influenced her life. National Association for Prevention of Child Abuse and Neglect, 95 percent of sexually abused children will be abused by someone they know and trust, and 84 percent of sexual victimization of children under 12 occurs in a residence.

I make an effort to cover topics that happen every day but that people find either too painful or taboo to speak of. Today, I have a returning guest who covers the topic of miscarriage and other issues she encountered during her pregnancy. Various medical staff gave her different answers while she was on an emotional rollercoaster, which ended up affecting every aspect of her life.

Today I speak with Zoey who shares a story about traveling the country to meet friends. One destination turns into a nightmare where she's held captive and assaulted for several days. It's a devastating story about a breach of trust that destroys our illusion of safety. 

Today's episode talks about an invisible demon that affects our daily lives. Gnawing pain, sharp pain and everything in between.  Jael gets sick with swine flu and never fully recovers.  He talks about his frustrations with his day to day activities and is diagnosed with fibromyalgia.  Kate develops ankylosing spondylitis which shatters her career. She discovers a creative outlet that she can do from home.   #fibromyalgia #ankylosing spondylitis #swineflu

My guest Sam, talks about domestic abuse from his girlfriend. They will end up getting married, moving away from friends and family, further isolating themselves into darkness. Sam will end up leaving her in the end and is safe.  Please listen to the whole episode. My guest gives an update at the end.     

I thought it would be fun and informative to answer some questions from the listeners! I tried to answer every question that came in, forgive me if I didn't get to yours. It took a few days of recording so my voice is all over the place. Thank you Misti for getting the ball rolling on this episode.  

We all know someone who suffers from addiction whether we want to admit it or not. Addiction can manifest in many forms from doctors overprescribing drugs to individuals self-medicating or even boredom.  My guest talks about her struggles with mental illness and how drugs and alcohol gave her a temporary relief from the pain, only to cause worse problems down the road. 

Today I'm joined by the Captain from True Crime Garage. The Captain's personality is very mellow and easy going which makes his story so surprising. He talks about one of the worst years of his life where he sought treatment for depression. What happens next is a downward spiral of failures, setbacks and terrible decisions. Nobody is immune to depression and mental illness and sometimes the people who are supposed to help us might make things worse. That said, if you are experiencing depression or issues, please seek help. This episode is not attempting to dissuade anyone from treatment. Everyone's story is different. Prescriptions, when prescribed correctly, should have a predictable intended effect. Yet any drug can have adverse effects on any individual. It's not an easy balance to achieve but we should never stop trying.  www.truecrimegarage.com @truecrimegarage   

Somnambulism or noctambulism, otherwise known as sleepwalking, is a sleeping disorder that has affected us for centuries. There are different triggers that we are just starting to recognize. Science helps us understand how it happens but we're still discovering why. On today's episode, I speak with Bonnie from Wining about Crime and Nikki from Strictly Homicide about their sleepwalking experiences.  Also if you're not listening to the podcast This is Actually Happening you're missing out. It's the closest pod that I've found to The Peripheral.  https://www.sleepfoundation.org/sleep-disorders-problems/abnormal-sleep-behaviors/sleepwalking https://art19.com/shows/this-is-actually-happening-podcast

 I like to do scary stories during the month of October As most of you know, I prefer to shed light on real-life issues we face every day. This episode focuses on men who faced physical and sexual assaults. All of their stories are different, but they have one thing in common, they all take place in the woods. Stats on male sexual assaults are wildly under reported. Please listen to the victims.  https://www.nsvrc.org/statistics

Today's episode we explore the darker side of podcasting. Think actors reading mean tweets but we'll go a bit further than that. I've seen that first 1 star review destroy a podcasters confidence. I've seen trolls and harassers bring other podcasters to the brink. I've collected submissions from other podcasters that read some of the worst messages they've received or just the messages they've received today. What you'll hear only scratches the surface of what we endure on a daily basis. This isn't anything out of the ordinary. This is just a Tuesday in a podcasters life.  http://www.insightpod.com/ https://vovpodcast.podbean.com/ https://canadiantruecrime.ca/ http://www.mauramurraydoc.com/podcast/ https://www.oxygen.com/people/maggie-freleng http://www.thevanishedpodcast.com/ http://thinkingsidewayspodcast.com/ https://art19.com/shows/generation-why-podcast        

I had the pleasure of meeting Josh during my travels. As most of my conversations with people go, we skipped past the small talk and went straight to the trauma that has impacted his life. Josh contracted HIV after he was raped. He talks a bit about the attack and the repercussions from that night. His resilience and overall demeanor make him a superhero in my mind.   I hope you enjoy hearing Josh’s story as much as I enjoyed speaking with him. Check out his other podcasts if you have the chance.   http://www.our-americana.com/oapodcast/ http://www.our-americana.com/karenandellen/

Today's guest talks about her lack of impulse control, harm thoughts, and OCD. She takes us down a path where she was on the brink of causing great harm to her fellow students. This episode will give listeners some insight into the Aurora shooter, Chardon HS shooting, and Parkland. We discuss things that can go right and wrong in the prevention of teens that could lash out towards others. We touch upon SSRIs and exposure therapy and their place in treating mental illness. 

Commonly called postpartum depression but more accurately referred to as postpartum disorder. It's regularly misunderstood as simple depression but runs the gamut from anxiety to psychosis. Mothers who suffer from this are routinely judged and accused of being a bad parent. We are unable to control our hormones and chemicals that balance us every day. Pregnancy causes an extreme shift in a woman's body which creates havoc for her emotions and mental stability. My guests speak about their struggles, the shame they endured and how this topic is definitely on the peripheral. 

We've talked about parents a lot on this podcast. Our first story involves a father who supports his family by not so legal means. After his disappearance, a secret life is revealed. Emma's colorful description of the family's reaction to their father's whereabouts is classic.  The second story takes a darker turn. After Rose's family splits up she moves in with her father.  Every daughter puts all their trust into their father and every father should protect that trust. His voyeuristic actions not only put her in danger but destroy the family. This is a situation that no child ever wants to find themselves.  

Have you ever wondered what happens to guns that are seized by police or who cleans up after a murder?  This is a not a true crime episode, rather what happens in the aftermath. On this episode, my guests talk about their roles in clean up, confiscation and give their views on the industries they work in.    https://www.facebook.com/TheCleaningofJohnDoe/ @JohnDoePodcast  

Part 2 is here! No worries if you haven't listened to part 1 yet. These episodes have similar topics yet fell on opposite ends of the spectrum. My guest, Mary, talks about the abusive upbringing that led her to a path of depression and low self-esteem. This combination drove her to seek validation in any way she could. After going through an endless supply of young men who invite her into their bedrooms, she still does not find a way of fulfilling herself. We do not go into explicit details but there are adult themes and language.  

This will be a two-parter on sexual disorders. I say upfront in the episode that sexual disorders are more mental disorders that can reveal themselves in numerous ways. My first guest has severe anxiety that's prevented him from being intimate with women. My 2nd guest will be featured in part 2 and falls on the other end of the spectrum. It shows two different stories can come from the same coin.  Finally show https://pleasingterrors.com/ some love. He's had a very rough week. 

Happy to be back in the saddle after a long unexpected hiatus. I try to give a quick update and jump right into the story. This week I speak with Igor about his upbringing. He talks about his hard-working family and how he always felt like the black sheep. His father suffered from PTSD from the time he spent on the front lines of the Bosnian war and his mother struggled in the relationship. Igor struggles with his own demons while his family adapts to a new life in a new world.     

Happy Valentine's day. I didn't intend to release an episode on domestic abuse on this day we should be celebrating our partners. My first guest is from Russia but has migrated west to Sweden where her nightmare begins. She also has an interesting introduction that I thought listeners would want to hear about. My second guest Brandon is a fun and energetic guy. When he was a teenager, his mother found herself in with a man who would put the entire family in jeopardy. 

Not exactly a holiday special but a gift to everyone. I speak with two members of the LGBTQ community who talk about some experiences behind the rainbow flags. I hope anyone listening will reflect on their actions and words this holiday season and try to accept and love each other even more. NSFW there are some sexual topics and language covered in this episode. 

On this episode, my guests Erica and Debbie find themselves living in different cults. There are many similarities between how cults function but their impact on each is unique. They recall the shame and difficulty of leaving and how it destroyed families and relationships.  Debbie and her friend Laura are starting a multipart series called "I Got The Hell Out." Keep a lookout for their first episode.   I give an important PSA for fellow podcasters at the beginning. It's something that affects all podcasters and using my podcast as a platform is the efficient way for me to get the word out. 

For my Halloween special I have a collection of scary stories for you! These aren't exactly paranormal but horrifying situations where our lives or others are threatened.  First story - Arrow to the knee Second story -Snake in your bra Third story - Things that stay with you Fourth story - Things change Fifth story - Chivalry is not dead Sixth story - Kansas Mothman Seventh story - Trapped underneath 

This episode is about never giving up. Tragedy takes a toll on all of us and challenges our will. My guest Pamela was born into a rough life, had everything taken from her, yet she persisted. She was a wonderful guest and I hope I've done her story justice.  Pamela's story http://pamelamsadventures.blogspot.com/ Dominica Relief Fund  https://www.youcaring.com/glanvilliaportsmouthstjohndominica-966770

When we lose our grip or have a bad mental health day and need to go somewhere, who takes care of us? On today's episode I speak with Sarah who works in a psychiatric facility and takes care of patients who need a little help - ok, sometimes a lot of help, and Sarah and her staff are there to do the job. She takes us through a typical day and through some of the rougher days. I hope you find this conversation educational and as interesting as I did.   

In this episode I interview Jenna who talks about same sex parenting and in vitro fertilization. Jenna goes into great detail about the process and gives advice on choosing your doctor. The second interview is Lisa who found herself raising a mixed race child on her own. Growing up in rural America, she knows she has some challenges ahead.   In other news, I've hired an editor and will be releasing a bunch of my back logged episodes in quick succession compared to my sporadic releases. 

This week is a Patreon request for odd medical conditions. First I speak with Sara who has Turners syndrome. She explains the levels of Turners and what inspires her everyday.  http://www.turnersyndrome.org/ Then I speak with Eleanor who has been diagnosed with Dissociative Identity Disorder. She explains her system and busts common myths about DID.  https://www.nami.org/Learn-More/Mental-Health-Conditions/Dissociative-Disorders I had to read up on both before interviewing. I found their stories fascinating and inspiring and hope you do too.  

This week I discuss sex, dating, and staying safe with Maeve and Jeremy from the Sexland podcast. They are very colorful, upbeat and real when it comes to finding a partner.  We recorded in person which changes the dynamic of the conversation. This is less storytelling and more informative for anyone who is single, divorced, or wants to make a change in their sex life. 

I'm joined by Steven who does the Is This Adulting Podcast. He shares his struggles with depression and anxiety throughout his life. He talks about his suicide attempt, what led to it, and how it molds his perceptions today. He's a fun-loving guy who doesn't hold back.  https://www.facebook.com/IsThisAdulting/ @isthis_adulting

On this episode, I speak with Blue who is a 16-year old transitioning from female to male. I'm sure I ask a lot of questions that may be obvious to most. Blue is very kind and patient as he speaks about his struggles and successes.  I learned a lot from Blue and hope you do too.   

It is said that the five most stressful life events are divorce, moving, major illness, job loss, and the death of a loved one. We search for answers and understanding in any crisis for closure and justice. The death of a loved one puts our lives in a tailspin where logic is gone and emotion takes over. This episode I speak with Julie about her father and Jolene about her brother.  When there isn't a clear answer or reason, unanswered questions can consume our very being.  

Jennifer joins me for this week's episode about sexual harassment in the workplace and out in public. It's a topic that is getting more attention in the media with much debate on what is and isn't considered harassment.  I feel Jennifer's story embodies the feelings that most women have. We do go off topic a bit but I thought it was informative and needed to be heard. Last thing, I had some audio issues and had to run noise reduction. Please forgive the lower audio quality. 

On this week's episode, we dive into near death experiences and learn more about how health facilities treat patients. Jess shares her story about suicide and being revived. Shawn has pancreatitis and put into a medically induced coma. Our final guest Lucy, who host's the podcast S'laughter, talks about her mother-in-law being taken by the state and the madness that ensues. 

On average 3 women are murdered every day by their husband or partner. According to the national domestic abuse center, 1 in 4 women are victims of abuse. Please find thehotline.org  or call 1-800-799-7233 On this week's episode, we cover domestic abuse. Our guest Megan gives a story arc of her relationship from beginning to end. It starts with little digs her boyfriend would make to alienation from her friends and family. His actions escalate to physical and sexual abuse. Even though Megan stays casual, it’s a terrifying story.

You ever wonder what the prequel to the Peripheral was?  Aaron and I have shared many of our own personal stories on the podcast but I wanted to hear listener stories. This was my first interview I did almost a year ago after asking listeners for tragic stories in their lives. Being an IT guy myself, I'm always drawn to cyber crime or scandals and this story was so unbelievable to me that I had to share it. Mhyar wrote to me and told me about an incident that happened to him while chatting with a woman online. https://theeyeopener.com/2014/09/he-was-literally-stabbed-in-the-back/

Things happen to us in life that we just can not plan for. Most of the time we can recover quickly and pick up where we left off. The bodies we occupy can be uncooperative and fragile. Doctors are not perfect and don't always have the answers we need. When you know something is wrong, please be persistent when speaking with any medical professional. Strokes affect 800,000 people in the US alone. Concussions in many cases go untreated and can cause much greater consequences than most realize. Our final story is about Endometriosis. It is estimated that between 6-10% of woman have endometriosis yet is relatively unknown and is routinely misdiagnosed. 

I hear a lot of people say their OCD is kicking in and have seen memes on the internet for OCD people ranging from perfectly placed dominoes to OCD tests. Most of what we see or hear about OCD misrepresents the condition and does a disservice to the people who struggle with it. Sarah shares her experience with OCD and how therapy has impacted her.  

Anytime we suffer a terrible tragedy we always second guess, point fingers, and place blame. On this episode, I speak with Rob who suffered the loss of a child while living in China. When his daughter Anne got sick, Rob took Anne to every hospital and doctor he could. The environment, culture and even the healthcare system all become barriers he had to overcome in an attempt to save his daughter.  He wanted to share his experience living abroad, his loss, and the story of his daughter so she'll never be forgotten.

We all have done stupid stuff in our lives. I asked for stories about getting arrested and I got them! I received so many I only responded to the first 3.  Brian, Jamie and Colin share stories ranging from a DUI, driving 156 mph on the highway, to vandalism. All of their stories have twists and turns that kept me guessing what was going to happen next. We all learn from our mistakes and hopefully learn what we should and shouldn't do (reminds me of an old Clash song!).  

It's hard to wrap your head around the untold number of unreported rapes that happen. It also might be hard for some to understand why we don't report when we've been assaulted or raped. In this episode I speak with two guests who talk about the aftermath of reporting their attacks. The results should shed light on why victims hesitate to report this crime.  

I've never had much exposure to eating disorders and did not understand the havoc they wreak on the human body. On this episode I speak with Kristel and Lauren who both suffer from bulimia. This wasn't an easy episode for me to do and I know it wasn't easy for them. I hope anyone listening gains an understanding that eating disorders are a combination of compulsion, addiction and many other disorders.   

For this episode I speak with Ruckus who walks me through the underground world of male sex work. It's a casual conversation about how he keeps himself safe while still delivering services to new clients.  Forewarning, this episode covers adult themes that may not be suitable for bosses or co-workers in a professional environment ;)   

I've always felt slightly alienated during the holidays. Everyone seems to love the time they get to spend with their families.  I rarely speak with my mother and try to avoid family get togethers at all costs. Instead I make time for people that I feel truly love and support me, my friends and my wife. I haven't gone so far as to cut off any family but I do speak with two guests who have. 

I'm turning 40 so this week I'd like to give the listeners what they want. Apparently "my story" is in high demand.  I talk about all the times I was arrested, my drug use and give personal details about my teen years.  I'll take you through some of the events that have molded my views and perceptions on life. I hope listeners gain some understanding and empathy for even the most troubled individuals. 

Inspired by Art Bell's Ghost to Ghost I bring you 3 terrifying listener stories that will leave you questioning everything you believe.  Danielle kicks us off with a story about a little boy who is upset that his photos have been taken down.  Lindsay gets a visit from an old co-worker who doesn't realize her shift has ended.  Denise who is struggling with health concerns receives a warning from something inhuman.   

Where do we really go when we sleep?  What, really, are our dreams?  Do you dread falling asleep at night? Maybe you know something is waiting for you once your consciousness slips into that darker astral plane. Over 70 million Americans suffer from sleeping disorders and that number is in the billions worldwide. Sleep and brain wave studies attempt to unlock the secrets of the human mind but they don't have all the answers yet.  In this episode I talk to two guests, TJ and Erica, with terrifying sleep disorders: sleep paralysis and night terrors.  Can you imagine what it's like to feel trapped in your body and unable to move? Or to have your mind conjure up a terrifyingly vivid scenario from which you can't escape? For my guests, these sleep conditions are all too real.   https://www.sleepassociation.org/

Chronic pain is a medical condition doctors have struggled to treat. When medicines like oxycodone and hydrocodone hit the market, they seemed like a near-magic answer.  As doctors were assured by manufacturers that these new drugs weren’t addictive, they prescribed them freely.  What doctors didn’t know was they were all made from heroin; by the time manufacturers were brought to court, it was too late.  In this episode I talk with Jeremiah, who is overweight with severe back pain. He finds relief in the form of prescription pain pills,  which allow him to push through the pain and exercise but ultimately lead to bigger problems. My second guest, Dave, shares his struggle with addiction which impacted his life in an earth-shattering way.   

  For almost 60 years marijuana has been a Schedule I drug, prohibited by the government like heroin from 1937 until 1996, when California first allowed marijuana to be legally used for medical purposes. For nearly 5,000 years before that, however—including immediately prior to making it illegal—marijuana was in common use.  Racism, misinformation, and social conditioning are among the obstacles today that have prevented potentially life-saving scientific research—and lined the pockets of opioid-manufacturing Big Pharma Companies.  What are the worst side effects of marijuana? Would you consider giving your child marijuana? Does it really have any medical benefit? You might find the answer in this episode, where I talk with parents who ran out of traditional treatment options for their children and a retired nurse whose home was raided for growing marijuana for her ailing husband.    

Ever question the bounds of forgiveness and love?  Natalia Aggiano suffered the murder of her mother at the hands of her father. Yet that isn't all there is to this story. Natalia will grant the ultimate forgiveness while being attacked for it. She'll go on to fulfill her mother's wishes of being an organ donor and give someone else a chance at life. https://amzn.com/178219360X http://theforgivenessproject.com/stories/natalia-aggiano/   https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TJ6THQGTRtY   https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2VQCv_Ax0hY   https://twitter.com/nataliaaggiano    

At 17, my guest Erin from Australia gets her first real job. Her boss trusts her enough to give her access to his computer. But when he leaves for a week and asks her to get promo photos, she's horrified by what she finds amidst his files. My second guest, Erinn from the U.K., shares a candid account of the sexual and physical abuse she endured as a child. We cover some very disturbing topics on this episode so listener discretion is advised.    

My guest Ann has experienced a lifelong struggle with bipolar disorder that results in extreme mood swings and depression. With the sudden loss of her young son, she embarks on a personal journey that reveals an unwavering inner strength.   

The Silk Road was famed in days of old as a mysterious, magical route to purchase exotic goods from then little-known India and China.  The Silk Road of modern times, built on the Dark Web by a troubled libertarian tech whiz, became a dark route to purchase anything illegal - from drugs to weapons to much worse. My guest Broc talks about his journey down the Silk Road to addiction, his plummet to rock bottom, and his road to recovery.  

  On this episode I'm joined by Mary from Brisbane, Australia, who was brought up Jehovah's Witness. She talks about being raised believing the end of the world was near and only the anointed had seats in heaven. Because of her struggles with god and family, she ends up leaving home at 15 to fend for herself on the streets. The miracle of her story is how she survived and flourished after such an extreme paradigm shift.

Guests Molly and Kelly share their terrifying stories of being stalked and raped. We discuss why rape goes unreported, the helplessness that accompanies trauma, and the internalizing of blame. If you've been in this situation or are currently going through this, please reach out for help.  VictimsofCrime.org Stalking Resources http://bit.ly/help-for-victims   SafeHorizons.org  Help for Stalking Victims http://bit.ly/safe-horizons Safe Horizons hotline: 1-866-689-4357  

Who defines relationships? Should relationships be restricted to being emotionally and physically intimate with a single person? Or, in this modern age, is it more practical to have our needs met by multiple consenting individuals? My guest Meredith discusses her open marriage, the nature of polyamory, and why her lifestyle works for her.

We see the billboards and PSAs against drunk driving and mutually express outrage against drunk drivers who kill. Yet many of us are too ashamed to admit we have started a car when we shouldn’t have.  In this episode I'm joined by Kathy, who made the mistake of getting behind the wheel after a night of drinking. Her story lets us know that drinking and driving even once could potentially destroy everything.       

What comes after death - not the afterlife, but real life? If both of your parents die and someone asks about them, what do you say? Is it too sad or awkward to discuss how you really feel?  On this episode, I speak openly about grief with my guest Hannah. My second guest, Courtney, is an artist specializing in Victorian mourning art who offers insight into how our views of death and mourning have shifted over the years.

When we hear the term “mental illness” we dismiss it as rare, someone else’s problem, or a criminal issue. It isn’t: it’s more common and afflicts more of us than you might believe.  One out of every five adults or around 43.8 million Americans are diagnosed with some form of mental illness every year. This means anyone who isn't suffering directly from mental illness is most likely living with or knows someone who is.  So why is it still being marginalized? This week I share my experience living with my brother who suffered from schizophrenia. My guest Tiffany discusses having bipolar disorder and tackling her personal demons.   

Guest Kayla Jane Danger discusses ethical porn and how the industry functions. For all the protest about online information and how it should be free, users often forget that sex workers - most of them female - are trying to earn a livable wage. By downloading their work and not paying for it, users are violating intellectual copyright and effectively breaking the law. www.kayladanger.com www.mydollparts.com

Sometimes the road is less traveled for good reason. In the premiere episode I share how I learn a painful lesson after my older brother  takes me on a dangerous journey, and a listener relates a horrifying, unexpected discovery.