This is a place for you to find the information and support you need to make the transition to motherhood an empowering one.Together your hosts Kelly Wilkes and Bree Holling will combine evidence-based information with personal insight to help you heal from past experiences, make informed and empowered decisions, grow as individuals and mothers and find solidarity in this journey that is matrescence. Whether you are a mother, a birth worker or just a woman driven to be the best version of herself, as long as you like belly laughs, heart warming stories and over sharing, this is a place for you.
#45 Supporting Your Family Through the Death of a Loved One With Death Doula Amanda
,Content warning: Death, miscarriage, domestic violence In this week’s episode we chat to mum of 3 and death doula, Amanda. Amanda became a mum earlier in life than expected. While she breezed through conception and pregnancy, Amanda’s first birth was not what she had planned for, hoped for, or expected. Despite wanting a natural birth, Amanda agreed to have her first birth induced. After 17 long hours of back to back contractions, she was taken for an emergency c-section. She gave birth to a beautiful, healthy and hungry 5.5kg baby boy. Amanda was unable to breastfeed and switched to formula early on. She recalls feeling judged (both by herself and others) for this decision. These unexpected challenges rocked Amanda’s confidence and shaped her early motherhood experience. After multiple losses, another 2 c-sections (including one very healing one) postnatal depression and more, Amanda’s family was finally complete with three beautiful boys. Around this time, Amanda made the decision to leave her toxic relationship and move closer to her village. For a short while, she relished in having the constant physical and emotional support of her parents, however shortly after her dad was diagnosed with liver cancer and died within a month leaving a gaping hole. Amanda soon came face to face with death again, when her mother was diagnosed with uterine cancer. While devastated by this news, their family felt more empowered in their approach to end of life this time. She spent the last 9 months of her mum's life straddling the roles of “good mother” and “good daughter.” She shares with us some of the challenges of trying to solo parent her three children, while also providing support to her parents during this incredibly challenging time. Amanda shares with us how they were able to center her mother's needs, utilize their village and weave ritual into her mother's eventual passing. In a cruel twist of events, Amanda did not have time to process her mother’s death, as 6 short weeks later she was diagnosed with breast cancer. As a single mum, sole breadwinner and still adapting both emotionally and logistically to life without her parents, Amanda recalls spending the 36 hours after her diagnosis awake trying to understand what would happen to her boys, if she was to pass away. The next few years were filled with scans, surgeries, radiation and more, but as a family unit they made it through and today Amanda is proudly and gratefully, in remission. These experiences, have led Amanda to the work she does now as a death doula. Today, Amanda works for not-for-profit “Violet,” providing free information and support to families navigating the last stage of life, as well as the grief and loss that accompanies it. Throughout the episode Amanda shares her wisdom for navigating death when you have young children including; How to talk to kids about death in a way that is both honest and age appropriate, how to talk to aging parent's about their wishes for end of life, how to weave ritual and choice into death, why you would hire a death doula and so much more. To connect with Amanda: @amicusmortisdoula--- This episode is sponsored by Together Pregnancy and Postpartum To connect with them on Instagram: @together.perinatal To listen to her podcast "Postpartum like a boss," or book a session with Gemma, or access any of her other offerings: https://togetherpnp.com.au/ --- Connect with us on Instagram: @Matrescence.podcast Or head to out website: www.birthofamother.com.au
8/29/2022 • 1 hour, 27 minutes, 53 seconds
#43 Is She A Good Baby? With Dr Alix Vann.
In this week's episode we chat to Alix. Alix is an eldest daughter, a mother to a 4-year-old daughter, a clinical psychologist, and a recovering ‘good girl’. Through both her post-graduate training and clinical experience, and her own lived experiences of being parented and raised in the pursuit of perfect, Alix has become intimately acquainted with the notion of "the good child” and how this presents in the mothering experience. Alix’s own introduction to motherhood was fraught, with her mother dying of bladder cancer when her daughter was 8 weeks old. Layering the gravity of this grief and loss onto Alix’ in built system of functioning – to be and do everything to the highest of standards, to make achieving look easy, and to self-sacrifice at all costs – created the perfect storm and resulted in what Alix would come to know was severe postnatal depression. Faced with an unsettled baby (acutely perceptive to the emotional environment around her, screaming and wailing for a whole family in mourning and out of their depth), who found sleep extremely difficult, so much about the experience of early motherhood felt like a terrifying failure. Alix has lived and breathed the pressures of breaking down the ‘good girl’ image to be a real girl, and to have the opportunity to try and parent the baby in front of her – not the perfect baby, but her baby. Through her work in two independent private high schools in Brisbane, Alix also has experience in how the pressures and expectations that may accompany mothering, with being a female in our society, and with being parented in a certain way, can culminate to influence a child’s experience of the education system and their development into adolescence. She has fought hard to bring awareness and support regarding perfectionism, self-care, and self-compassion into schools, and this has been well received by staff, students and families alike. Most recently, Alix has instigated the concept of Wellness Groups for high school students, to provide increasingly normalised support for adolescents going through similar psychological challenges (e.g. anxiety, low mood, interpersonal relationships, self-care struggles), and to try to offer some alternative pathways to psychological stability and a solid sense of self, without reliance on performance, outcomes and achievements. Alix completed her Bachelor of Psychological Science with First Class Honours in 2007, receiving a University Medal and topping her Honours Year. In 2012, Alix graduated from a Doctor of Psychology (Clinical), and has 10 years of clinical experience as a psychologist. Despite all of this, she’s a real woman, struggling in her own way, and embracing the rebel within to be vulnerable and re-parent herself, in the hopes that this will benefit not only her own life, but that of her daughter and clients too.Throughout this episode, Alix applies both her professional and personal experience to the topic of the "good baby." We discuss how and why society expects baby's to be quiet, compliant and make parent's lives easier, how these expectations grow and change as babies age and what we can do to free ourselves (and our children) from these constraints. --- This week's episode is sponsored by Chronicles of Play. Head to their website: https://www.chroniclesofplay.com.au/To purchase copy of 365 Ways To Play: https://www.chroniclesofplay.com.au/product-page/365-ways-to-play-bookInstagram: @chroniclesofplay---Connect with us on Instagram: @matrescence.podcast Head to our website: www.birthofamother.com.au
8/1/2022 • 1 hour, 15 minutes, 31 seconds
#44 Our Story: Insights on The Mental Load, Working Motherhood and the Supermum Myth.
8 years ago on a Sunday afternoon, Bree walked down Kel's long drive way for an interview. After the news that their neurdiverse son was no longer welcome at Before and After School Care, Kel and her husband had been forced to explore other care options. While the first nanny was okay, the fit wasn't quite right. 18 and with minimal experience with children, on paper Bree was probably not an ideal candidate. In fact, on her first day she had to call her mum to walk her through how to cook mashed potato. However after an hour spent chatting, they both knew that this was meant to be. For the next 7 years, Bree nannied Kel's two boys: Through both her pregnancies, often with a baby strapped to her back and another in tow, through a cross-the-globe move, both the boys graduating primary school and so much more. While this experience was no doubt enriching for the boys, as you will hear in this episode, the decision to hire a nanny is one that created ripples throughout both family units and left no part of their lives unaffected. Throughout this episode Bree and Kel explore topics such as the mental load, the Perfect Mother Myth, how they approached communication and decision making as a team of three, the logistics and finances of hiring a nanny, guilt and shame attached to this decision, some hilarious and heart warming stories from the past 7 years and so much more. To connect with us: Website: www.birthofamother.com.auInstagram: @matrescence.podcast @kel.matrescence.podcast....This episode was sponsored by The Nurture Village. To connect with them: Instagram: @ThenurturedvillagehampersWebsite: www.thenurturedvillage.org/....
8/1/2022 • 1 hour, 6 minutes
#42 Navigating The Transition From Professional Woman To Mother (And Back Again) with Dr. Lisa.
Content warning: This conversation involves mild discussion of abusive relationships and the lasting affects this experience can have on our motherhood journey. In this week’s episode we chat to Dr. Lisa about the transition from professional woman to mother (and back again). Lisa is a doctor of public health and has spent her career conducting large scale randomised control studies, publishing in top ranking journals, supervising students up to PhD level, and more. These days, Lisa runs a small online business dedicated to stocking high quality baby products and is currently contemplating her return to paid work after the recent birth of her second child. In her spare time (haha) Dr. Lisa runs an Instagram page, where she utilises her professional knowledge to unpack the research, remove the shame and offer a nuanced look at into the realities of parenthood. Needless to say, this conversation has both personal and professional context for Dr. Lisa. Throughout this conversation we discuss how the transition from woman to mother affects women physically, emotionally, financially. We offer personal insights from our own experience’s navigating this transition and combine them with statistics and research on topics such as the motherhood penalty, the care-career conundrum (as conceptualised by Dr. Sophie Brock), the unequal distribution of domestic labour, the mental load and so much more. Whether you are currently navigating this transition, want to make sense of it retrospectively, or are preparing yourself for the future, you will love this episode. •••To connect with Dr Lisa on Instagram: @drlisa.researcherHead to her website: https://www.playnourishthrive.com.au/•••This weeks podcast sponsor is Erin from WattleTree postpartum.To connect with Erin on Instagram: @wattletreepostpartum Head to her website to book her services: https://www.wattletreepostpartum.com.au/(Mention this ad for a discount) •••Come chat to us on Instagram: @matrescence.podcast Or head to our website: https://birthofamother.com.au/
7/19/2022 • 1 hour, 30 minutes, 2 seconds
#41 Blind Mum of 4 Ebony Uamaki Shares Her Insights on Matrescence
Content warning: Child physical, emotional and sexual abuse.In this week’s episode we chat to Ebony UamakiEbony is an mother of 4 children under 5 (including twins), an intuitive reader and a coach. She is also completely blind. Ebony has worked with thousands of people around the world sharing her intuition, insights and wisdom. And today she shares them with us. As you will soon hear, in many aspects of her life, Ebony’s disability has challenged her. Growing up she endured child abuse, bullying and complex trauma- at times related to her disability. But when it comes to both her work and motherhood, it has become her greatest gift. As Ebony says: her insight has become her eyesight.Throughout the episode, Ebony discusses some of the logistics of navigating motherhood when you are blind, how matrescence was a catalyst for her personal growth, her decision to employ a support worker, how she is fostering secure attachments with her children and so much more. This conversation was both profound and hilarious. We hope you enjoy listening as much as we enjoyed chatting.••••••••••••If this conversation brings anything up for you, please know that there is support available. The Beyond Blue Support Service provides 24/7 advice and support via telephone (call 1300 22 4636), webchat and email (email response provided within 24 hours).Alternatively, please reach out to us on Instagram @matrescence podcast if you need to chat or explore your options for further support. •••••••••••••To connect with Ebony on Instagram: @ebonyuamakiEbony regularly shares snippets of her life as a blind mum of 4; including videos of her cooking, doing her make-up and caring for her children. She also shares beautiful reflections related to her work as a coach and intuitive reader. To work with Ebony, please send her a DM. ••••••••••••••This week’s episode was sponsored by Sarah from Blossom and Snooze To connect with Sarah on Instagram: @blossomandsnooze Join the waitlist for her August Blossoming Mums group program: https://blossomandsnooze.com/group-programBook private sleep support here: https://blossomandsnooze.com/1-on-1-consultation
7/11/2022 • 1 hour, 10 minutes, 53 seconds
#40 Matrescence as a Catalyst For Professional Rebirth with Rachael Rose
In this week’s episode we chat to Rachael Rose. Rachael is a women's circle facilitator, teacher, doula and business woman. While her business is multifaceted, it is connected by a common thread of wanting to build communities, connect women and offer spaces where mothers feel less alone and more loved.As her business has evolved, she has moved into the business coaching space as well. In her words: “There is no village to return to, we must create the world we want to see.” Rachael is doing exactly that. In this episode, we chat to Rachael about how matrescence can be a catalyst for professional rebirth, what to do when the work you once loved no longer feels like a good fit for you, why so many new mums start business, the unique challenges and benefits of starting a business during new motherhood and so much more. To connect with Rachael on Instagram: @the_rachael_roseOr, head to her website: https://www.rachaelrose.com.au/
6/27/2022 • 1 hour, 21 seconds
#39. Life update: Returning to work, parenting teens, pulling kids out of daycare + more.
Hello beauties. Welcome back!In this week’s episode Bree and Kel get you up to speed on what has been going on behind the scenes. What Bree is doing for work and how she is feeling about it, how Kel is navigating this new stage of parenting teens, some updates on the kids, the podcast, and so much more. This is a vulnerable and imperfect conversation between friends. We hope it will keep you company and offer some belly laughs when you need it most. We can’t wait to bring you another season packed full of knowledgeable guests and thought-provoking conversations.
6/21/2022 • 1 hour, 12 minutes, 14 seconds
#38 Low Libido and Finding Your Way Back to Intimacy With Sex Therapist Jo.
For many couples, the return to sex after having a baby is slow, bumpy and sometimes even a little bit awkward.Between hormones, fatigue, contraception, changing bodies, unpredictable schedules and feeling touched out, there is a lot to contend with. So whether you are 12 weeks or 12 months postpartum, if you're not having much sex, you're certainly not alone. In this week's episode we chat to Jo Robertson about sex and intimacy in the postpartum period.Jo has a Master’s of Science in Medicine specialising in Sex Therapy, through Sydney University, and a Post-Graduate Diploma in Counselling. She has had 15 years’ experience working in sexual health, through education and counselling. Jo has a private therapeutic practice specialising in problematic sexual behaviours, female sexual dysfunction and relationship breakdown due to infidelity & betrayal. She is also the Research and Training Lead for The Light Project, a charitable trust researching media influences on sexual culture and how to have positive conversations about it. She did a TEDx talk in 2019 titled ‘Why we need to talk about porn’ and speaks internationally on the topic of “youth and porn”Watch it here: https://www.tedxchristchurch.com/jo-robertsonThis answer all of your questions about low libido, mismatched libidos, feeling touched out, scheduling sex and so much more. Connect with Jo on Instagram: @sextherapistjoLinks mentioned in this episode:OMGYES: https://www.omgyes.com/?gclid=CjwKCAjwrqqSBhBbEiwAlQeqGolZfL92lp-pw52G59cjxZOQ0h3T_11haGgKvODWQQS_eLUmO5nJGBoCSsIQAvD_BwEPjur Lube Stockist: https://www.lovehoney.com.au/brands/pjur/?_fp1=ppc_generic&_fp2=14820519319&_fp3=130593081009&_fp4=pjur&utm_id=go_cmp-14820519319_adg-130593081009_ad-549108742734_kwd-204220725_dev-c_ext-_prd-_mca-_sig-CjwKCAjwrqqSBhBbEiwAlQeqGsMkKHYRPxHdW0LruvZzRDfMs50v_BwGHMcIbEUTDiayLZXyd9fBxRoCTXAQAvD_BwE&utm_source=google&lh_cpt=gen&gclid=CjwKCAjwrqqSBhBbEiwAlQeqGsMkKHYRPxHdW0LruvZzRDfMs50v_BwGHMcIbEUTDiayLZXyd9fBxRoCTXAQAvD_BwEGotman Institute cards: https://www.gottman.com/couples/apps/Durex Bullet Vibrator: https://www.durex.com.au/sex-toys/durex-intense-delight-bullet/Connect with us on Instagram: @matrescence.podcast Website: www.birthofamother.com.au
4/4/2022 • 1 hour, 5 minutes, 52 seconds
#37 Postpartum Planning and the Parts of Motherhood That We Don’t Talk About With Kathryn Millhouse
Slowly but surely, we are seeing an increased awareness of the need to prepare for birth. More and more couples are investing their time and money into hiring doulas, reading books, writing a birth plan and accessing independent birth education. We love to see it. But the truth is, that birth is just one (very very) important day in your motherhood journey. Once your little one is earthside, the hard work really begins. And yet we are not seeing the same investment in preparing for the postpartum period. In fact, most couples never really give it a thought, until they are living it. Today's guest Kathryn Millhouse, is passionate about changing the way we think about, plan for, and navigate the postpartum period. Prior to the birth of her daughter, Kathryn spent 15 years working in economic advisory, commercial management and consulting roles. Like many women, matrescence was a catalyst for her rethinking her career path. As you will hear today, Kathryn experienced a very challenging postpartum period, complete with delayed bonding, feeding challenges and mental health challenges. In order to access the support she needed, Kathryn had to advocate for herself and navigate a health care system which was not set up to support the needs of the postpartum mother. This experience made her acutely aware of the huge gap that exists in mother-centric postpartum care, as well as the stigma associated with not coping with the transition to motherhood. In order to fill this gap, Kathryn founded her perinatal advocacy organization MotherUp. As part of her work Kathryn leverages her knowledge of economics to identify and coordinate a families unique resources to support mothers and the broader family during the postpartum period. One way that she achieves this is through working with expecting families to develop a postpartum canvas. Today Kathryn walks us through what exactly that is, and how you can utilize it prepare for a positive postpartum experience. Kathryn is honest and vulnerable about sharing some of the less talked about realities of new motherhood. Regardless of where you are at in your motherhood journey, we know you will find solidarity, clarity and knowledge from this episode. To work with Kathryn: https://motherup.com.au/Connect with Kathryn on Instagram: @_motherupOur website: matrescencematters.com.au On Instagram: @matrescence.podcast
3/19/2022 • 1 hour, 31 minutes, 53 seconds
#36 Birth, Death and Naviagting These Powerful Rites of Passage With Keely Costello
In this week's episode, we chat to Keely. Keely is a New Zealand, born Australian raised expert, currently living in the U S as you will, hear, Keely is a bit of a Jack of all trades. She's a military wife, a mother of two, a yoga instructor health coach, and is currently working towards both her Master of Arts in Clinical Mental Health Counselling, as well as her certification as an end of life doula. Today Keely shares with us, her two births- one quick ecstatic, very sudden birth in a birth center, and one intentional instinctual hospital birth, which came after the death of her baby girl, June at 23 weeks. As Keely is a personal friend of mine, I had the privilege of sharing in both the joy and heartbreak that came with June's pregnancy. Keely navigated this path with so much intention and grace that it absolutely blew me away. I immediately knew that when she was ready, we needed to have her on the podcast to share her story. And today she does exactly.Keely offers beautiful insight into the experiences of bereaved parents, the decisions they face, the support they need and how death shapes your matrescence journey. Subsequently, she talks about how death can be the catalyst for immense personal growth, as well as her aspirations to support families through this powerful rite of passage.To connect with Keely:https://www.guidedbykeely.com@keelyanncostello@guidedbykeelyAdditional resources:The Untethered Soul: The Journey Beyond Yourself https://www.amazon.com/dp/1572245379/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_glt_i_X050YH4K7G42PRXEEJFHThe Five Invitations: Discovering What Death Can Teach Us About Living Fully https://www.amazon.com/dp/1250076749/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_glt_i_HETT94141K3XAN4H30VPThe Knowing: 11 Lessons to Understand the Quiet Urges of Your Soul https://www.amazon.com/dp/1683647173/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_glt_i_F1FCFKD50MFESJ9FYBG5Awake At The Bedside: Contemplative Teachings On Palliative And End-Of-Life Care https://www.amazon.com/dp/1614291195/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_glt_i_FBC7FNFQR1E09FY2YPDHhttps://www.ted.com/talks/bj_miller_what_really_matters_at_the_end_of_life?language=e
3/16/2022 • 1 hour, 24 minutes, 1 second
#35 Patrescence: The Transition to Parenthood- With Regular Dad Will
While progress is slow, more and more we are seeing a growing awareness of the term matrescence - What it means, why it matters and how it shapes our experience of motherhood. We now have a handful of experts, books, blogs, podcasts and social media accounts dedicated to increasing awareness and understanding of this powerful rite of passage. As the women in our community grow in their understanding of matrescence, we are seeing an increased capacity and desire to understand their partner's experience of this transition. However, many men have a hard time discussing the challenges they face throughout their transition to fatherhood. While men may not endure the physical experience of pregnancy, birth and breastfeeding, men and non-birthing partners experience many of the same changes that mothers do. Not only does parenthood restructure their social life, sex life, finances and more, but more and more research suggests that men and non-birthing partners also experience hormonal changes as well as changes to their brain structure and function. This absolutely fascinating. While there is still a huge lack of research into men's experiences of the transition to fatherhood, this rite of passage has been given a name - patrescence. Today we get to explore patresnce through the eyes of local Brisbane dad - Will. Throughout the episode, we discuss his fears and apprehensions about fatherhood, how he found the experience of trying to conceive, the moment he found out he was going to be a dad, his involvement in the pregnancy, watching his son crown, and so much more. This episode is rich and hilarious and is definitely one that you're going to want to listen to with your partner.
3/8/2022 • 1 hour, 13 minutes, 33 seconds
# 34 Finances, Solo Parenting, Traveling the World With Kids, and Not Losing Yourself to Motherhood- Megan’s Story
After traveling the world for 8 years straight, Megan returned to Australia single, homeless, unemployed and pregnant.Despite her circumstances, Megan felt calm, confident and optimistic about the journey that lay ahead. After the birth of her son, Megan returned to TAFE to complete her senior years of high school. This allowed her to gain entry into Curtain University to complete a double degree in financial planning and accounting, and subsequently her CPA. While navigating the challenges of single parenthood and part time work, this journey took Megan an admirable 13 years. During this time, through scrupulous saving and hard work, Megan managed to hold onto a part of herself which she refused to surrender in the name of motherhood- her love of travel. From living on a single parents pension and using cotton balls as a cheap alternative to baby wipes, to taking her son on a train across Russia, watching the weightlifting at the Beijing Olympics, snowboarding in Japan and shopping in Cairo. Today, Megan shares with us the details of how she made it happen. This episode is packed full of tips and tricks about navigating finances and travel with young kids. But above all else, it is a story of resilience, optimism, and holding onto the parts of yourself that matter throughout matrescence. We know you will resonate with Megan's infectious optimism and incredible outlook on both motherhood and life itself. To connect with us:Instagram: @matrescence.podcast
2/28/2022 • 1 hour, 8 minutes, 25 seconds
#33 Loneliness, Mums Groups, and Making Friends Throughout Matrescence
Regardless of how you enter into motherhood, the experience of matrescence is universal. Matrescence is powerful, irreversible and will change you to your core. So the fact that your friendships might also change, should come as no surprise. And yet, it often does. The fact is, that the vast majority of women, becoming a mother changes their friendships. Sometimes this will be for the better- letting go of that toxic friendship may be long overdue. But other times it will bring with it grief, disappointment, isolation and loneliness. Without an understanding of matrescence, it can be easy to conclude that you have done something wrong. That you simply have not put enough time and energy into maintaining friendships. But, as you will soon hear, there are a variety of reasons why your friendships change when you become a mother (many of which you have no control over). Understanding that changes in both the quantity and dynamics of your friendships, are a normal and predictable outcome of matrescence, can reassure you that you are not alone, you are not to blame and this will not last forever. Throughout this episode we talk about our own experiences of loneliness, isolation, making and loosing friends through motherhood and so much more. If this episode brings anything up for you, please know that there is support available. PANDA National Perinatal Mental Health Helpline: 1300 726 306To connect with us: Instagram: @matrescence.podcastWebsite: www.matrescencematters.com.au
2/21/2022 • 56 minutes, 54 seconds
#32 Bree and Kel Christmas Special
Christmas is the most magical time of the year. Or is it? Every year it feels like Christmas costs more. This year, Australians are set to fork out $23.9 billion on everything from presents to pina coladas.But there is another cost that is rarely talked about. The cost of women’s time, energy and sanity. As Christmas draws near, women are busy working behind the scenes to pull off the work of an entire Christmas village. No Santa's little helpers. No Rudolph. Just a mum who loves her kids so damn much. Depending on what your family unit looks like, the men in your life may also be chipping in however, research suggests that women continue to take on a disproportionate amount of the load. This is nothing new. In fact, for many, it is painfully familiar. Christmas has a tendency to amplify the inequalities that women experience every day when it comes to the division of labour, the mental load and emotional labour. By the time Christmas Day arrives, women are limping over the line, completely exhausted by the silly season, but the work is not done. Not even close. In this episode, Kel and Bree discuss the big and small ways that they are trying to reclaim Christmas. How they navigate the mental load, gift giving, conversations about Santa, and why one year Kel decided to give all of her Children’s gifts to an orphanage. This episode is full of laughs. The perfect, palate cleanser for the silly season. To connect with us: Instagram: @matrescence.podcastFacebook: Matrescence Matters.
12/13/2021 • 50 minutes, 2 seconds
#31 Kel and Bree - Real Talk Life Update - November 2021
In this week’s episode Kel and Bree sit down together to check in, and chat about some big life changes; Building a house, moving, supporting a child with chronic unexplained illness, updates on both Kel’s doula studies and Bree’s midwifery studies, a career change.. or not, how Bree is adapting to life as a mum of two and so much more. As they wrap up the end of the season, Kel and Bree wanted to strip it right back. No experts, no plan, just an honest conversation, about the ups and downs of motherhood. The Matrescence Podcast grew from a desire to bring these exact conversations to you. To allow you to be a fly on the wall through intimate conversations about identity, money, roles, the mental load and more. So today join us, as we make sense of our own matrescence journeys, and help you to make sense of yours.
11/30/2021 • 1 hour, 9 minutes, 40 seconds
#30 Maintaining Intimacy through Matrescence: Insights from married couple Brad and Tabitha
In this episode, we talk to Brad and Tabitha Fennel. Brad and Tabitha are acupuncturists with a thriving clinic on the Gold Coast in QLD, but as you will hear, their work extends far beyond this. In their day to day work, Brad and Tabitha work with couples and individuals, helping them to reconnect with themselves and reconnect with their life. One of the reasons we sought out Brad and Tabitha as guests is that we are a big fan of their own podcast: Turn On The Podcast. Brad and Tabitha walk the walk and have been happily married for over 25 years. They have a beautiful dynamic between them, which comes across throughout this conversation. In this day and age, it's really rare and important to see long-term couples who are happy and thriving. Brad and Tabitha maintain that long term relationships can not just stay strong, but actually evolve and improve with time. This conversation covers thoughts about maintaining intimacy, reconnecting with yourself and with your partner as well as some practical strategies, reassurance and guidance on how to navigate it as best as possible.We hope you enjoy listening to this conversation where Bree and I enjoy drawing anecdotes, thoughts and feeling about maintaining, enjoying and even improving intimacy and our relationship with our partners.Connect with Brad and Tabitha on Instagram @turnonthepodcastTo work with Brad and Tabitha head to: https://www.studioqi.com.au/
11/22/2021 • 1 hour, 20 minutes, 21 seconds
#29 Breastfeeding Q&A with Sam Foster IBCLC
In this week’s episode we chat to Sam Foster. Sam is a Midwife and Lactation Consultant experienced in all areas of pregnancy, birth and the postnatal period including lactation and infant feeding. She qualified as a Midwife in the UK in 1997 and worked in the community and the hospital until she emigrated to Brisbane in 2011. Throughout the episode we chat to Sam about her journey from being a midwife in the UK, to now working exclusively as an IBCLC in Brisbane. Sam also indulges us with a conversation about her decision to not have children and how she feels this affects (or more accurately, does not affect) her work with women. In the second half of the episode, Sam answers all of your breastfeeding questions. From feeding schedules to using a loofah to prepare your nips, we answer them all.This episode is full of insight and laughs. To connect with Sam you can find her on Instagram @samfosteribclcTo book an appointment with Sam: https://www.growmedical.com.au/sam-fosterFollow us on Instagram: @matrescence.podcast Head to our website: www.birthofamother.com.au
11/8/2021 • 1 hour, 24 minutes, 41 seconds
#28 Supporting Your Little One’s Innate Desire to Learn with Unschooling Mama Laura.
In today’s episode we chat to Laura, an unschooling mama to 3 beautifully wild children. Throughout the episode we talk about homeschooling and unschooling, including the logistics, the legalities and what the day to day looks like when children are in charge of their own learning. From here we dive into, what the average parent can learn from the unschooling philosophy (spoiler alert, there is alot). Regardless of how or where you choose to educate your child/ren, you will play an integral-role in their learning. Laura shares insight and tips into how parents can support their little ones natural curiosities, foster their innate desire to learn and raise children that are life long learners. Finally, we chat to Laura about her matrescence journey including; how she finds joy, fulfilment and rest in this intense season of mothering, how this lifestyles has changed her views on paid work, and the learning and unlearning that got her to this place. We believe that we can learn so much from listening to people who make choices that are different to our own. Maybe you’ll learn something new, maybe you will pick up some ideas on how to support your littles ones innate desire to learn or maybe you’ll just enjoy the company and entertainment. Either way we know you will love this episode. ••• I first connected with Laura on Instagram. Her page reflects so many of her passions and hobbies including birth, unschooling, reading, cooking, craft and adventuring. Two things I absolutely love about Laura's Instagram page are her practical ideas for activities with your children and her insights on both motherhood and child-rearing. Connect with her here: @this.wild.mama. Laura also runs a Facebook group called Home schooling Littles Australia which I am a member of. It is a great resource for anyone who is home schooling (by choice or otherwise) and/ or looking for activities for their young children. Connect with us on Instagram: @matrescence.podcast Join our Facebook group: Matrescence Matters
11/1/2021 • 1 hour, 14 minutes, 15 seconds
#27 When Breast Feeding Doesn't go to Plan with IBCLC Kate Visser
All throughout pregnancy, midwives, GP’s, friends and strangers alike, remind us of the importance of breastfeeding. By the time women give birth, they have well and truly internalized the message that “breast is best.”However, while our society promotes breastfeeding, it does not protect it.Medical interventions, mother-baby separation, inadequate lactation support and paid parental leave, all mean that mothers face an uphill battle in establishing and maintain breastfeeding. As a result, few women meet their personal goals for their breastfeeding journey. Whether you breastfeed for a day or a year, stopping before you are ready can lead to feelings of grief. In a well meaning attempt to reassure mothers that their babies will thrive no matter how they are fed (and they absolutely will) we often overlook, or completely dismiss, women’s own feelings about their feeding journey. Today's guest knows exactly what it feels like when breastfeeding does not go to plan. Kate is an experienced midwife, nurse and International Board Certified Lactation Consultant from the NSW Central Coast. She is a proud mama of 3 and knows what it’s like to need professional breastfeeding support that is holistic and timely.Throughout this episode unpack the notion of “breast is best.” How our society promotes but does not protect breastfeeding. Why breastfeeding sometimes does not always go to plan and why it is never your fault.Most importantly, we hold space for all women, regardless of their feeding experiences or feelings. Connect with Kate on Instagram: @milkybusinesslactation Head to her website: https://www.milkybusiness.com/Connect with us on Instagram: @matrescence.podcast Head to our website: www.birthofamother.com.au
10/25/2021 • 1 hour, 16 minutes, 38 seconds
#26 Supporting Men Through Their Trasition to Parenthood w/ Steven Kennedy from Birthing Dads
In this week's episode we chat to Steven Kennedy who is the founder of Birthing Dad's and the PREPARE Foundation. In his past life, Steven was a sparky, an engineer and an actor. In 2017 Steven welcomed his little boy into the world. Despite having invested heavily in birth preparation, Steven recalls this experience as being traumatic for both parents. Born by emergency c-section with an APGAR score of 1, their little boy required extensive resuscitation and spent the first 12 hours of his life in special care.This experience drove Steven to begin researching the topic of 'men at birth' and the wider implications of the cesarean and birth trauma rates that define modern childbirth.Steven concluded that most expectant fathers are not adequately prepared for the experience of witnessing childbirth – even though 95% of dads are now placed in a critical birth support role. He also realised that very little was being done to provide dads with the knowledge and confidence required to support birth effectively. This led Steven to create Birthing Dad's. Birthing Dads is an evidence-based antenatal education program aimed at providing men with a simple how to guide to enjoy pregnancy, support birth like a superhero and breeze into fatherhood with a smooth landing. Throughout this episode Steven speaks vulnerably about his transition to fatherhood, the traumatic birth of his child, how men can support their partners throughout pregnancy, birth and beyond and importantly, how we can better support men through this life changing transition. To find out more about Birthing Dad's: Birthingdads.com.au (Listeners can use the coupon code "Matrescence" to get 20% off their advanced program. To see the important work that the PREPARE foundation is doing: https://prepare.org.au/To read Stevens blog post on the role of father's in childbirth (mentioned in the episode): https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/elephant-room-steven-kennedyConnect with Steven on Instagram: @birthingdads Link to men's mental health support services and resources (mentioned in the episode) https://www.panda.org.auhttps://www.sms4dads.com.auhttps://www.cope.org.au/readytocope/Connect with us on Instagram: @matrescence.podcast Head to our website: https://birthofamother.com.au/
10/18/2021 • 1 hour, 14 minutes, 40 seconds
#24 Matrescence - Navigating the Identity Shift with Yara Heary
In this episode, we sit down with Yara Heary, to talk about the identity shift that accompanies matrescence. Yara is a Perth Based psychologist who works exclusively with women throughout conception, pregnancy, and motherhood. Yara started Life After Birth Psychology following the birth of her first son which started her on yet another journey of self-rediscovery. Her experiences throughout early motherhood sparked her passion to support other women as they navigate their own family of origin dynamics, the social programming of the “good mother”, relationship changes with those around them, identity shifts, and role changes to find their place of balance and authenticity as mothers.Throughout this episode we take a look at our identity shifts when we become a mother. We discuss the fact that sometimes the process of becoming a mother can cause us to lose touch with ourselves, to let go of our goals, hobbies, aspirations and friendships, and what to do about it. We normalise the changes of matrescence, and the fact that sometimes we are not in love with every single part of it, and we give both hope and strategies to find your way back. me.This conversation brought us right back to the very reason we started this podcast: To better understand matrescence, and how it can affect our experiences as both women and mothers. If you have ever asked the question "Who am I now that I am a mother?" If you have lost touch with your interests and passions. If you sometimes feel discontent or restless in your mothering. If you are feel that your old friendships, career, goals or hobbies are no longer serving you, then this episode is for you. ...To find out more about Yara and the work she does visit www.lifeafterbirth.com.au or engage with her on Instagram @lifeafterbirthpsychologyYara also has an 8 week coaching online group starting next year for mothers called the Rebirth. Interested people can find out more and register at https://mailchi.mp/lifeafterbirth/rebirthwaitlistTo continue this conversation, connect with us on Instagram: @matrescence.podcast Head to our website: www.matrescencematters.com.au To chat to like-minded women, join our Facebook group: Matrescence Matters
8/23/2021 • 56 minutes, 33 seconds
#23 Gentle Parenting with Rebecca Cefai
In this week’s episode we talk to Rebecca Cefai from Growing Gently Psychology about all things parenting. As a registered psychologist with many years of experience working in the childhood development and parenting space, Rebecca was perfectly positioned for a smooth transition to motherhood. However, like everyone else, motherhood turned her world upside down and she quickly realised that there was a gap between best practice parenting and what was realistic when you were on the ground, in the trenches and knee deep in parenting. Throughout the conversation we discuss both what the research says about parenting and our own lived experiences, including stories of when we really got it wrong. Rebecca teaches us how to get clear about our parenting style, what to do when you are not on the same page as your partner, how to repair when you f*ck it up and so much more.Subsequently, we explore the responsive/ gentle parenting style, including what it is, why there is a growing trend towards this kind of parenting and what it looks like in a real life context.At 37 weeks pregnant and in lockdown, Rebecca also shares her plans for birth, including her hope to have a maternal assisted cesarian.This was an honest, vulnerable & non-judgemental conversation about parenting. Join us for this weeks episode. To continue to conversation connect with Rebecca at @growinggentlypsychology https://www.growinggentlypsychology.com.au/ Follow us at @matrescence.podcast Head to our website: www.Matrescencematters.com.auJoin our Facebook group: Matrescence Matters
8/16/2021 • 1 hour, 4 minutes, 14 seconds
#22 Your Pelvic Floor in Pregnancy, Birth and Beyond with Caitlin Dunsford
In this weeks episode we chat to Caitlin Dunsford who is a women’s health physio working across both the public and private sectors in Sydney. Throughout this episode we chat to Caitlin about some of the normal changes that your core and pelvic floor undergo in order to grow and bring a baby into this world, how to take care of your pelvic floor in pregnancy and in the early postnatal period, and how to know when things are not as they should be. We also discuss what a women’s health physio does, when and why you should see one and what to expect from your appointment. Lastly, we grill Caitlin with some rapid fire questions from our Facebook group members. This conversation was fun and informative. The information we covered should really be required learning for anyone who has a vulva, whether they plan to, hope to, or have already had children themself. Regardless of what stage of your journey you are at, this conversation will hve you feeling more informed about your pelvic floor. To connect with Caitlin:Instagram: @pelvicfloorwithcaitlinLinktrwe: https://linktr.ee/PelvicfloorprojectCaitlin’s Pelvic Floor Project: https://thepelvicfloorproject.com/our-programsLinks to resources mentioned in the episode: https://www.continence.org.au/@coreandfloorrestoreTo continue the conversation connect with us: Follow us on Instagram: @matrescence.podcast Join our Facebook group: Matrescence Matters Head to our website: www.Matrescence matters.com.au
8/9/2021 • 1 hour, 5 minutes, 16 seconds
#21 Rediscovering what normal sleep looks like with kids
As a new mum, your baby's sleep habits can easily dominate conversations. Is she sleeping through the night? How often does she wake over night? Does she self soothe? Does she sleep in the cot, my baby will only sleep on me. You will ask each other overe coffee. We search the internet, books, social media and chat to other mum's in order to gage what is normal and to find answers to the problem of our child's sleep. Throughout the first year of our child's life we chase the elusive goal of sleeping through the night convinced that if we can just reach that point everything will be okay.We wrongly assume that everyone else's baby is sleeping through the night and worry that we are doing something wrong. We desperately try to follow safe sleeping guidelines, despite the fact that our babies have not got the memo that after 9 months of being inseparable from their mother, they are now expected to sleep alone in a cot. Sleep is a pillar of wellbeing. It affects our physical and mental health, the way we parent, our relationship, our ability to perform our work (paid or unpaid) and so much more. It is unsurprising then that we place so much emphasis on our baby sleeping well. Because if our baby is not sleeping well, chances are neither are we. In our modern society however, it seems we have lost touch with what normal infant sleep looks like. Coupled with the fact that the demands of modern life are not conducive with wakeful babies, we often find ourself desperate for a solution. In our desperation many of us turn to sleep programs or sleep school. I know because I have been there. We convince ourselves that patting their mattress or shushing is enough comfort. We ignore that deep yearning to go to and comfort our baby. To bring them into our bed for a cuddle. We tell ourselves and others that is it working, and maybe it is until a sleep regression come along. Or teething. Or sickness. Or one of the many other disruptions that are so normal in this phase of life. Then what? Whether you choose to bed share, place your baby in their own room, co-sleep, sleep train or any other approach, sleep is going to play a big role in your parenthood experience. In this episode we dive into what sleep looks like in our home. Spoiler alert, it is not even close to textbook. We don't have all the answers, like you we are on the journey to figuring out how to get enough sleep in this phase of life, but we can promise you that this conversation will leave you feeling a little lighter, will take the shame out of unconventional sleep situations and will leave you feeling more informed and prepared to tackle sleep – regardless of what it looks like in your house. Now, as always we want to put the disclaimer that we are not experts in infant sleep. Infact we are not experts in anything. But chances are neither are you. Like you we are just mum's trying to make sense of the research, to keep our babies safe and to get as much sleep as possible. Now if you enjoy this episode, we will find you an expert to really dive into this topic. Let us know on social media.
8/2/2021 • 1 hour, 21 minutes, 1 second
#20 The Role of the Birth Partner with Andrea Hausheer
In this week’s episode we speak to Andrea.Andrea is a doula and birth educator who works with couples all over the globe to prepare them for birth. Andrea’s birth courses are unique in that they pay particular attention to the role of the partner- both in birth and in the months that follow. Throughout the episode we explore the role of the birth partner, why it is so important and how to do it well. We also touch on some juicier topics partner’s who insists on staying away from the business end or sitting the birth out completely.This episode is perfect for couples who are currently preparing to give birth or processing the role that their partner played in their birth. It is informative and insightful and we know you will love it.If you want to get in touch with Andrea, follow on whichever link suits your needs:Website: https://www.birthprepcourse.com Instagram https://www.instagram.com/andrea_hausheer/Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/thebirthprepcourse
In this weeks episode we talk to a beloved member of our Brisbane birth community, Kirby Hood. @olivejuicelifestyleKirby is a birth photographer, videographer, Doula and more and was responsible for capturing Emmy’s birth. While Kirby is well known in the birth community, few know her story. Kirby’s introduction to motherhood began when she became a step parent to a beautiful two year old girl. As she navigated her co-parenting journey, she was on her own journey to conceive.What followed was multiple pregnancies, rounds of IVF and devastating losses. Somewhere along the line Kirby discovered her passion for birth work and began photographing and supporting mothers through pregnancy, birth and beyond. Some questioned whether she was just torturing herself by surrounding herself with people doing what she longed to do herself. Kirby and her husband Alex are finally ready to explore IVF again after encountering many barriers relating to her weight. She shares her hopes and dreams for this experience. Throughout the episode we explore the challenges she has had to work through in order to make peace with her identity as a mother, how being a step parent and experiencing multiple losses has shaped her matrescence journey and the stigma she feels around being a birth worker who has not birthed a full-term live baby. @unexpectedfamilyouting@fatpositivefertilityRed Nose Grief and Loss Support Services: 1300 308 307SANDS miscarriage, stillbirth and newborn death support 24/7 bereavement support line: 1300308307https://www.pregnancylossaustralia.org.au/https://www.lifeline.org.au/
7/19/2021 • 1 hour, 2 minutes, 50 seconds
#18 Preparing For A Positive Postpartum
In this episode, we catch up with Bree at 1 week post partum to talk about how she prepared for her postpartum journey and reflect on how it's going so far one week in. She talks in detail about what she did to prepare for postpartum and how it has played out. She reflects on the impact on her mental health and the things we put in place. What worked, what didn't and hopefully by sharing that with you, you'll get some ideas maybe for your own journey or to support someone in your life as they go through their postpartum experience.
7/11/2021 • 46 minutes, 40 seconds
#17 Birthing Outside the System with Emily The Authentic Birthkeeper
In today’s episode Kel and I sit down to chat to Emily about birthing outside of the system. Emily is a mother of 2 who lives in Melbourne and works as an authentic birth keeper.Like so many birth workers, Emily had given very little thought to pregnancy and childbirth until she embarked on her own journey to fall pregnant. Following 14 months of trying unsuccessfully to conceive, Emily sought the support of an OBGYN and was eventually diagnosed with endometriosis. After undergoing a D&C and laparoscopy, Emily was told that she would never fall pregnant without the support of IVF. This advice didn't sit well with her. Instead, she decided to embark on a journey of research and discovery opting to instead pursue natural fertility therapies which resulted in her falling pregnant in just 3 short months. This process sparked a determination within her to follow her intuition and take responsibility for her own decisions moving forward. Emily went on to experience a positive and transformative home birth with her first child that opened her eyes to the short comings of the maternity system which most women currently give birth within. This experience was the catalyst to her discovering her passion for birth work.Emily now works as a Birth Keeper in the Melbourne region, serving women who wish to birth outside of the system and within their full sovereighnty. Determined to walk the talk, in March this year Emily went on to freebirth her daughter after experiencing a completely wild pregnancy, guided only by her intuition. This conversation is informative and entertaining. Throughout we discuss some of the challenges of our modern maternity system, what it means to birth outside of this system (including the logistics and legalities), why women choose this option, how Emily supports women in her role as a birth keeper and more. We hope you enjoy this episode.If you want to get in touch with Emily, you can find her:http://www.authenticbirth.com.au/ https://www.instagram.com/the_authentic_birth_keeper/
7/4/2021 • 55 minutes, 21 seconds
#16 Becoming a Grandma through Teen Pregnancy - Tanya Shares her story
This episode is an absolute spine tingler. Tanya is a 47 year old middle class professional and single parent. Mum of two boys, Tanya knows first hand how intense the experience of matrescence can be.Last year Tanya’s matrescence journey took a unique turn when she found out her son, a child himself at just 15, was expecting a baby with his girlfriend or the same age. Whilst many of the teen’s friends had known about the pregnancy for quite some time, Tanya did not receive this news until they were almost 22 weeks pregnant. She had very little time to process this information as just two weeks later the baby was born via a true emergency c-section. Due to the baby’s gestation (just 24 weeks) what ensued was a long NICU stay with many tough conversations and setbacks. Throughout this episode, Tanya speaks to the push and pull of of attempting to parent her own child, while supporting him to step into the role of a parent himself. All the while having to work within the constraints of multiple systems, being the sole bread winner for her family, parenting her other child and entering into a new love relationship.Get comfy and make sure you have time to listen to this one uninterrupted. Tanya is an incredible story teller and has an incredible story to tell. Thanks to Tanya for her vulnerability sharing something that is intensely private but so important, and for opening up the conversation about teen pregnancy without shame or apology. What a privilege it was to share your story. Themes: Teen pregnancy, Teen mum, NICU, Emergency C-section, Foster Care, Child Services, Matrescence, Single parent
6/27/2021 • 1 hour, 3 minutes, 6 seconds
#15 Recovering from a severe (third degree) tear after homebirth
In this episode Bree sits down with Kel to discuss her experience sustaining a third degree (3B) tear during the homebirth of her second child, Emmy. Bree's homebirth was positive, empowering and everything she had hoped for. However despite having had an undisturbed physiological birth, Bree was surprised to realize that she wasn't experiencing the post-birth euphoria that so many had described. Infact, she seemed to be in quite a lot of pain. After some time spent bonding with her baby girl the midwives suggested that they do a routine assessment of tears. Initially they identified that Bree has sustained a second degree tear that could benefit from suturing however during the repair concerns were raised that it was infact a fourth degree tear. The decision was made to transfer to hospital for a more thorough assessment. Once in hospital it was established that Bree's tearing was of the third degree and would require surgical repair. Tune in to hear about the process of repairing tears after a homebirth, how this affected Bree's feelings about her birth and how her recovery has been so far. Themes: Third degree tear, 3B tear, severe tear, perineal tear, natural birth, homebirth, physiological birth, midwifery-led care, private midwife, doula, hypnobirthing, Hypnobirth Australia, hospital transfer after homebirth,
In this episode Bree sits down with her husband Matt to recount her birth story with their second child Emmy. After the positive but disempowering birth of her first child (See Episode 10), Bree knew that should they have more children she would want to have a homebirth. Long before she fell pregnant, Bree began assembling her team and planning her dream birth. By 12 weeks she had locked in a private midwife, enrolled in a Hypnobirthing Australia Course and asked Kel to be her doula. Throughout pregnancy Bree prepared for her birth by practicing hypnobirthing techniques and working through her fears and limiting beliefs in counselling. Expecting an early birth, Bree had her birth space set up from 37 weeks however, Emmy decided to stay put until 41+3 days. Despite the long wait, once labour commenced it was fast and furious lasting only 3 hours and resulting in a third degree tear (3B). Tune into hear about Bree's positive and empowering home birth, her experience with a third degree tear and hospital transfer and everything in between.Themes: Homebirth, Second baby, Severe tear, perineal tear, 3rd degree tear, 3B tear, hospital transfer, hypnobirthing, birth story, private midwife, continuity of care, midwife, midwifery led care, Hypnobirthing Australia, fetal ejection reflex, perciptous birth
6/14/2021 • 44 minutes, 36 seconds
#13 Talking to Kids about their body, consent and sex with Bridie Allan
Today we are joined by Bridie Allan. Bridie has a Bachelor of Psychology, a Masters Degree in Mental Health and is about to complete her Masters in Sexology. Bridie has been working with adults and children in a sexual health/ sexual education space for many years now including working in a prison setting with child sex offenders, victims, perpetrators and youth offenders. She has also worked in community psychiatric care where sexual issues are prevalent and now works exclusively with children. Throughout this conversation Bridie uses her unique insight and experience to highlight the importance of talking to children about sex, consent and their bodies. We discuss what these conversations should look like, who should be having them and how to ensure you are doing it a manner that is both positive and age appropriate. This episode is relevant to parents with children of all ages and stages and will allow you to feel more equipped and empowered when these conversations arise. If you want to find out more about the work Bridie does, you can follow her Instagram Page: https://www.instagram.com/your_friendlysextherapist/For a great resource on talking to kids early and often, check this out:https://healthywa.wa.gov.au/Articles/S_T/Talk-soon-Talk-oftenFor the link to OMGYES (as mentioned by Bridie in this episode) head to: https://www.omgyes.com/
5/12/2021 • 48 minutes, 51 seconds
#12 Returning to work during motherhood
In this episode Bree interviews Kelly about her experiences as a working mum. This story begins when at 30 years old, recently engaged and waiting for her visa to be approved, Kel found out that she was unexpectedly pregnant. Having already packed up their home and committed to an across the globe move to her company's London office, she and her husband decided to go ahead. What was initially meant to be years of adventure traveling as a couple quickly turned into a stressful juggle as her roles as mother and employee collided. Kel shares what that experience was like, what she learnt and how that shaped her views of working motherhood. Now that Kelly is on the other side, hiring employees (including mother's) for the global company she works for, she shares invaluable insight into the patterns she sees in working mothers, how to find a family-friendly workplace, how to approach resume gaps and more.
5/11/2021 • 40 minutes, 2 seconds
#11 Birth Story - Kelly and Anthony
In this episode, Kelly sits down with her husband Anthony to walk through the birth of their two boys, born in 2008 and 2010. It's an exploration of a couple well into their relationship and parenting journey as they recount the stories, emotions and very different births, one in Australia and the other overseas.It's a rare opportunity to hear a dad's story, in his own words and experience the interplay of funny anecdotes, difficult moments and honest emotions.Don't miss this episode.
5/10/2021 • 55 minutes, 14 seconds
#10 Birth Story - Bree and Matt
In this episode Bree sits down with her husband Matt to discuss the birth of their first child in 2018.Falling pregnant at 21, Bree decided to give birth through her local public hospital as part of their Midwifery Group Practice program. Together Bree and Matt discuss the lead up to their birth which included some major life changes and growth as a couple, and the birth itself which they feel was ultimately very positive, but not empowering. They touch on how their birth and postpartum experiences shaped their decisions about when to have more children and what that would look like for their family.Key themes: Young mum, Public Hospital Birth, MGP Program, Epidural, Second Degree Tear, Positive Birth, Challenging Postpartum, Homebirth.
5/9/2021 • 35 minutes, 54 seconds
#9 What is the Perfect Age Gap?
At some stage, every parent has asked themself: What is the perfect age gap? Back to back? Two under two? Wait until one is off to school? If you have found yourself on Pintrest late at night reading about the perfect age gap, this episode is for you. Throughout this conversation Bree and Kel share their experiences with their with two different age gaps. Kel talks about their conscious decision to have two children close together (14 months apart) for fears that if they gave themselves time to come up for air they would never be ready to go back again.Bree discusses about how a tough postnatal period shaped their decision to have a larger age gap between children (3.5 years) and how she feels about it now. Importantly, this conversation brings to light the many factors that influence a family's decision about how many children to have and when. Acknowledging that this is a deeply personal decision, we explore how to figure out what is right for your family. Themes: Age Gaps, Siblings, Family Size, Two Under Two, Postnatal Anxiety, Postnatal Depression, Perinatal Mental Health.
5/8/2021 • 36 minutes, 19 seconds
#8 Informed Consent in Birth with Danielle Rhodes
In this episode we explore the topic of informed consent with Danielle Rhodes. Danielle is a certified Hypnobirthing Australia practitioner and founder of Your Sacred Space Hypnobirthing and Hypnotherapy. Danielle regularly teaches couples about informed consent as part of the Positive Birth Program. Her passion for this topic is rivalled only be her extensive knowledge. Throughout this conversation we discuss what informed consent is (and what it is not), why it is important and how to make sure you are receiving the information you need to make informed decisions. No matter what stage of motherhood you are in, this episode will equip you with all the information you need to help you process your experiences, make informed and empowered decisions throughout your pregnancy, birth and beyond, and to help other women in your life do the same as they embark on their own journey to motherhood. If you want to hear more from Danielle find her at @your.sacred.space on Instagram or ahttps://yoursacredspace.com.au/ To find out more about your rights in child birth check out these websites: https://ama.com.au/articles/maternal-decision-making-2013 https://midwifethinking.com/2016/06/15/information-giving-and-the-law/https://humanrightsinchildbirth.org/index.php/who-we-are/https://www.birthrights.org.uk/Themes: Hypnobirthing, Hypnobirthing Australia, Positive Birth Program, Positive Birth, Informed Consent, Human Rights in Childbirth, Birth Plan, Choosing The Right Care Provider, Doulas.
5/7/2021 • 55 minutes, 47 seconds
#7 Choosing the Right Birth Education Course for You
In this episode Bree and Kel sit down to discuss their experiences with antenatal education. Kel does her best to recall her experience taking Lamaze classes in the UK before the birth of her first child in 2008. Bree discusses her experience taking her local hospital's antenatal classes before the birth of her first child in 2018 and how she felt they left her frustratingly underprepared for the "natural" birth she envisioned. Subsequently, Bree and Kel talk about their experience taking the Hypnobirthing Australia Positive Birth Program in order to prepare for Bree's upcoming birth. Throughout this conversation we explore the unique benefits and limitations of different styles of antenatal education. This podcast will help to ensure you choose a form of birth education that is most likely to prepare you for a positive and empowered birth –whatever that looks like for you. Themes: Hypnobirthing, Hypnobirthing Australia Positive Birth Program, Lamaze, Hospital Antenatal Classes, Antenatal Education/ Birth Classes, Hospital Birth, Homebirth.
5/6/2021 • 38 minutes, 26 seconds
#6 Returning to Study during Motherhood
In this episode Bree and Kel talk about their experiences studying during motherhood. Originally recorded in late 2020 Bree reflects on her first year as a student midwife and highlights some of the unique challenges of juggling university, work and motherhood. Kel discusses her experience studying to be a doula and how she is utilizing the self-paced online learning approach to complete her studies alongside a full-time thriving corporate career. Together they discuss some of the challenges, benefits and logistics of each of these avenues of formal education as well as how to find what you are passionate about, feeling worthy and making yourself a priority. If you are considering undertaking study as a new mum or even a well-seasoned mum, then this episode is a great place to start.Key themes: Online study, university, student midwife, student doula, finding your passion, volunteering, studying while pregnant
5/5/2021 • 49 minutes, 58 seconds
#5 Reframing Busyness in Motherhood
During this discussion Kelly and Bree analyze what "busy" means to them. Together they explore the difference between "time" and "capacity," and how to figure out if you are operating over capacity. This is not an episode with quick snappy suggestions about "how to have more time in your day" or "how to be more productive." It is a thoughtful discussion that involves unpacking where our beliefs about busyness originated from, who do they serve, why do mothers so often feel burnout and unappreciated and what we can do about it. This episode will help you to consider how being productive is linked to your identity and to make sure you are spending your days in a way that truly adds value to your life. It is the perfect antidote to the current hustle culture that is infiltrating motherhood. Key Themes: Busyness, Motherhood, Working Mothers, value
5/4/2021 • 56 minutes, 49 seconds
#4 Why Bree Chose a Private Midwife
In this episode Bree talks about her decision to hire a private midwife. We discuss what a private midwife does, how this experience differs to other models of care and whether it is worth the cost. Bree shares how she found and chose her private midwife and Kel shares some exciting news. Key themes: Private midwife, midwifery-led care, MGP, Doula, Homebirth
5/3/2021 • 29 minutes, 51 seconds
#3 Breastfeeding: Anecdotes and True Stories
Join Kelly and Bree as they remember and share their breastfeeding journeys as Bree contemplates doing it all again with her second child on the way. Among the funny stories and personal accounts are nuggets of knowledge to help prospective and new mothers with what no-one really tell you about breastfeeding, especially when you just don’t know what you don’t know.They touch on the challenges of learning a new skill, the changes your body goes through and even donating milk to others. There is so much information and yet there are so many things no one tells you, Kelly and Bree will take you through their stories in the hope of offering ideas and solidarity for a complex process through honest and funny storytelling.Key Themes: Breastfeeding, Milk, Donating Milk, Post partum Bodies. Drinking while breastfeeding, let down, Nipples, Changing bodies, Sex while breastfeeding, Linea Nigra,
5/2/2021 • 58 minutes, 11 seconds
#2 Birth Choices: Why the choices we make matter
As Bree announces she is pregnant with her second child we talk about processing her first birth and the options she are looking at for this birth. We touch on midwife led care, versus OBGYN and how to choose a care provider to meet your needs. There are key decisions to be made early in this pregnancy to ensure she gets the birth she wants.Key themes: midwife versus obstetrician, hospital versus home birth, brain technique, intimate birthing, antenatal testing, tests during pregnancy, gestational diabetes, birth stories, cutting the cord, choosing a care provider, positive birth experience, birth plan,
5/1/2021 • 42 minutes, 43 seconds
#1 What is Matrescence and what is the Matrescence Podcast?
Matrescence describes the process of becoming a mother. It encompasses the complete physical, psychological, social and emotional changes that come with this major right of passage.While 77% of Australian women have experienced matrescence, few have ever heard of the term. Have you? In this episode we attempt to answer the question; "What is Matrescence." Who coined the term? Why does it sound just like adolescence? And why aren't more people talking about it? Subsequently, we share our own experiences of matrescence and why this term has been so critical in our ability to process and reflect on our own experience of motherhood. If you want to know more about matrescence, there are some incredible resources already available to you. We would highly recommend you check out the links bellow. Ted Talk: Alexandra Sacks: A new way to think about the transition to motherhoodNew York Times Article: https://www.nytimes.com/2017/05/08/well/family/the-birth-of-a-mother.html?_r=1The work of Aurelie Anthan including her website: https://www.matrescence.com/Book: Mama Rising: Amy Taylor-KabbazPodcast: Dear Mama Project by Nikki McCahon