There may be no slavery deeper than doing it my way.

Having appropriate expectations for sober prayer.

How to deal with the sorrowful-joy of grief in a sober spiritual life.

Un-compartmentalized recovery.

Discussion and highlights from the recovery retreat held at St. John Chrysostom Church in Nashville on June 10, 2023. Watch the sessions at https://www.youtube.com/@chrysostom_nashville/streams.

The mother of all episodes...

Resentment and anger can often overtake us without our knowing. How can it and overcome it?

St. Gregory Palamas, what do we know about the unknowable? What do we do with repentance and sobriety?

How do we square Christ's command to do good works in secret with his other command to let our lights so shine before men? Where does grandiosity get in the way?

The path to God and wisdom begins with doing the things that correspond to our aim. A rigorously honest look at ourselves often yields the uncomfortable truth that there is a gulf between what we say we desire and what we are actually pursuing.

There is often a call for people to reap the results of their actions. The line between unchristian retribution and vengeance, on the one hand, and consequences aimed toward someone else's highest good and repentance on the other, can be stark and is guided by the principle of love. How do we understand the idea of either consequences or love in a world that defines both so differently than does the mind of the Gospel?

In this episode, Fr. Joseph and Fr. Michael discuss the pitfalls of grandiosity and the quiet heroism found in Anonymity.

Heading into the holidays, our hosts discuss the issues of consumerism in our culture. This is not a new phenomenon by any means - in fact, the desert fathers address it. The issue, at its core, is glutton and compulsion. It can even be a misuse of the idea of giving. The question we must all ask is, "where do I get agitated if I’m impeded?"

In this episode, our hosts discuss the topic of expectations. The truth is that expectations are almost always rooted in extremes, with the end result being a recalibration to the middle no matter the outcome of any situation. What does this mean for how we view others, especially the addict? When we make decisions on how to treat others (in and outside of the Church) we often hear the trite saying "what would Jesus do?" (WWJD). But, what is our view of Jesus? Is He merely a moral character, soft in disposition, who justifies us in our sins? Or does He require a much more radical transformation?

In this episode, our hosts tackle the issue of "rest" and workaholism. What does it mean to enter into the Sabbath Rest? Piggybacking off of the last episode's theme of peace, we can see that once order is established and justice is restored, God rests by becoming enthroned. When we enter into rest, we begin to participate in the words from St. John's Apocolypse that "to the one who overcomes, I will grant to sit with me on my throne". We find that reciprocal sabbath is the means by which God has established relationship with His creation. Work is addictive like any other substance, only - in our society - this vice of overworking is held as a virtue. We always end up RESTless, irritable, and discontent . . . which always leads to more problems.

What is peace? Is it some kind of esoteric feeling of tranquility - or is it something more? In this episode, our hosts dive into the issue of peace and its relationship to recovery. Tracking the concept of "shalom" in the scriptures, we can see that from Genesis 1 peace has less to do with a lack of confrontation and more to do with bringing order out of chaos. God's peace makes us whole and complete, and God's peace has to do with the well-being of an entire community. When we give ourselves over to this kind of peace, we learn how to reconcile opposites and bring in tension and endure it. The goal is to be able to ask for God's will and the strength to carry it out.

In this fascinating episode, our hosts address a common sentiment in many Evangelical circles that the Cross is the exclusive point of our adoration. Were any of the Lord's 33 years wasted? What about His baptism, His ascension? The discussion continues with a look at Yom Kippur - the Day of Atonement - and Christ as the scapegoat. The connection is drawn between the addict and the scapegoat and how we can image Christ in this way. We mustn't truncate the Gospel as it is, in its entirety, Good News.

Addiction is fueled by stress - in particular, those with stressful childhoods are much more susceptible to addiction. In this episode, our hosts discuss the four trigger points of stress in our lives: uncertainty, isolation, loss of control, and conflict. When we look at the medical data on addiction, the situation seems hopeless; however, the recognition of the image of God in each and every human being gives unfathomable hope as we battle for sobriety. Solving the problem our way leads to sin & death, solving it God’s way (repentance and recovery) leads to life. For these reasons, what we really need is a total distrust of self and complete & daring trust in God alone.

In this episode, our hosts take a deeper look at the concept of community - more specifically, the uniqueness of community within the confines of the Church and the Holy Trinity. Community cannot exist without a common purpose and life. When we speak about addiction, we see it as a disease of isolation that is ultimately disruptive to the human person in his very existence. When we encounter God in the Church, community is ultimately restored; however, as always, a sincere life of repentance is necessary.

In this episode, our hosts do a deep dive into defining what addiction really is. All too often, addiction is viewed through the lens of substances and chemicals rather than the complexities of human struggle. Addiction frequently presents itself as a spectrum and requires prayer and discernment before being brought up in conversation.

Today, our hosts discuss the aspect of addiction that leaves us trying to find peace, joy, and stress reduction through external means. Many relate addiction to the substance itself; however, the substance is but a symptom of the problem. Orthodox Christianity recognizes that we have an “us” problem - a fear of reality as it is. What we need, as always, is a life of repentance. We can spend a lifetime transferring our addictions from one thing to another, thinking, "if only _____, then I will be happy, then I will behave as a Christian". Dealing with the consequences of our life choices, and turning from them toward Christ, no matter how unbearable they seem, will ultimately lead to a better life. While we look for external solutions to our problems, we must remember that the Kingdom of God is within.

In this episode, our hosts discuss "half-measures" and how, when we hold back from fully engaging the Kingdom of God, we put ourselves at risk of nominalism and relapse. Drawing from the Lord's teaching about "cutting off our right hand", and the admonition in the Revelation of St. John, we see that being lukewarm avails us nothing and damages those around us. We must follow the advice of St. John Chrysostom to be strict with ourselves and merciful to others, for the culture in which we find ourselves isn't getting any holier, reducing truth to sentimentality and robbing us of the peace that surpasses all understanding. We must not be content with half-measures.

In this episode, our hosts discuss vulnerability and its roots in having the ability to be wounded. The implications for recovery are significant as the profound relationship between stress and trauma makes vulnerability extremely difficult for those seeking healing. The answer ultimately comes in the form of continued repentance and rigorous honesty 

In this episode, our hosts discuss meekness and the need for rigorous honesty in recovery. Consequently, to be honest with ourselves and God, we must face the darkness of our own sinfulness, which is where the mystery of confession comes into play. We cannot fix ourselves; therefore, we go to God in confession to find healing and to bear the fruit of repentance in our community.

In this episode, our hosts discuss how feedback loops work, how they exist in the spiritual life, how they’re not always bad, and how to break out of them. There is a process we go through and these loops begin with fleeting thoughts. The important thing is to remember that we are not our thoughts and we must be prepared with prayer and an actionable plan that we’ve developed with our spiritual father.

In this jam-packed episode, our hosts weave a tapestry of communal recovery based on the Orthodox life of repentance, as viewed in light of the Holy Pascha. Together, they discuss sin as being foreign to true humanity, what it means to fight the demons as the Body of Christ, the sociological & biological factors of addiction, and more. The parallels between recovery and salvation are staggering, and both require community.

In this episode, our hosts discuss the tension between viewing addiction for what it is, an illness, and personal accountability. We find that Orthodox spirituality does an excellent job of holding this tension without falling prey to an overly legal view, yet still recognizing the need for accountability. How can we support those around us struggling with recovery in a way that does the same? The therapeutic, holistic nature of our Orthodox faith holds the key.

Drawing on the wisdom of St. Theophan's admonition to have complete and all-daring trust in God, a complete distrust of oneself, to pray without stopping, and to strive without ceasing, Fr. Joseph and Fr. Michael help us to connect the Orthodox practice of watchfulness with sobriety and 12-step recovery.

In this episode, our hosts continue the lesson from last time and discuss how confusion and chaos can push us into a mindset of unmanageability. However, we are also given a plethora of wisdom in our Orthodox faith to help in the battle!

Fr. Joseph and Fr. Michael introduce themselves and discuss the focus of their podcast—connecting recovery to the Orthodox penitential life.