“I am deeply appreciative of everything Michael shares from personal experience. To me, it is the most reassuring and helpful of all.” A listener. Conversations about love wrapped in stories from my biggest failures. Learn with me the best ways to be kind when your spouse, kids, parents, siblings, and friends are being turds!
Letting Go In Love: Your first step to freedom
The first step in letting go in love is identifying the actual problem or issue you need to release...and there are three ways you handle it causing chaos in your life!
24/7 digital access to coaching from Dr. Michael Smalley, a path towards healing your pain, tools to shape your communication and intimacy, assessments to guide you, and a community of support from people who will cheer you on as you journey to the relationship you want. Join the VIP Inner Circle! Learn more. https://www.smalleyinstitute.com/vip
4/22/2021 • 35 minutes, 53 seconds
What other choice do you have? Letting Go In Love
Today’s show features professor Kris DeJeet as he joins me for the second episode in Release, the power, and freedom of letting go in love. Why is today important? As you’ll hear, what other choice do you have when life becomes overwhelmingly miserable.
24/7 digital access to coaching from Dr. Michael Smalley, a path towards healing your pain. Become a VIP! Learn more.
https://www.smalleyinstitute.com/vip
Are you struggling in your marriage with...
Difficulty communicating and asserting your needs?
Lack of intimacy and feeling disconnected?
Feeling stuck because you keep having the same fights over and over again?
Feeling easily triggered by built-up resentment?
Don't waste another day hurting! Let me help: https://www.smalleyinstitute.com/vip
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3/30/2021 • 42 minutes, 10 seconds
¡Release! The power and freedom of letting go in love
The first of a new series I'm calling ¡Release! It is one of the most fundamental things we have to learn to do in our relationships...but most of us want nothing to do with it! Instead of deeply connecting with our partner we choose to behave in ways that only sabotage our deepest need - to feel connected and loved.
24/7 digital access to coaching from Dr. Michael Smalley, a path towards healing your pain. Become a VIP! Learn more.
https://www.smalleyinstitute.com/vip
Are you struggling in your marriage with...
Difficulty communicating and asserting your needs?
Lack of intimacy and feeling disconnected?
Feeling stuck because you keep having the same fights over and over again?
Feeling easily triggered by built-up resentment?
Don't waste another day hurting! Let me help: https://www.smalleyinstitute.com/vip
3/19/2021 • 33 minutes, 58 seconds
Stew Grant and the power of the Dr. Strange technique
Ever been in a no-win scenario in life? You feel the loss of control and nothing you do can make the pain stop? Me too! I've got friend, pastor, and psychology professor Stew Grant on the show! Don't miss it!
https://www.smalleyinstitute.com/vip
If an epic, in-depth online experience is something you’d be interested in covering the discussion today or access to any of the downloads mentioned, and even better, 24/7 digital access to coaching from Dr. Michael Smalley, a path towards healing your pain, tools to shape your communication and intimacy, assessments to guide you, and a community of support from people who will cheer you on as you journey to the relationship you want. Join the VIP Inner Circle! Learn more.
24/7 digital access to coaching from Dr. Michael Smalley, a path towards healing your pain. Become a VIP! Learn more.
3/8/2021 • 37 minutes, 48 seconds
A devotion about trust when things don't go your way by Kris DeJeet
My friend and colleague sent me a devotional he wrote for himself. I knew instantly it would bless anyone willing to listen and believe!
https://www.smalleyinstitute.com/blog/a-devotion-about-trust
1/8/2021 • 13 minutes, 33 seconds
Obnoxious
The conversation I overheard this morning upset me so much I finally had to record again!
1/6/2021 • 14 minutes, 40 seconds
What is one word that can change my marriage?
Challenge accepted! One word can make all the difference in the world to your relationship! For the notes and more, https://www.smalleyinstitute.com/blog/what-is-one-word-that-can-change-my-marriage
12/15/2020 • 11 minutes, 56 seconds
How do I stay with a miserable spouse?
You need to hear this one! Gaslighting, laziness, and more can be dealt with if you are willing to do what works! https://www.smalleyinstitute.com/blog/how-do-i-stay-with-a-miserable-spouse
12/14/2020 • 13 minutes, 24 seconds
Unbreakable: Strategy Three - Connect and I mean sexually
The final strategy may be (ok...it is!) the best part of the entire Unbreakable series! Now don't mess it up.
12/10/2020 • 18 minutes, 41 seconds
Unbreakable: Strategy Two - live in harmony
You are in a precarious position, things are getting better, but... Now is the time to rebuild friendship and lean into your new normal.
12/9/2020 • 21 minutes, 34 seconds
Unbreakable - to ask or not to ask and other special issues
You need to know the right questions to ask and answer because the wrong questions will lead you down a path of destruction!
12/8/2020 • 25 minutes, 23 seconds
Unbreakable: Critical actions for the Wounded
If you feel betrayed in your relationship then follow these steps and wait for the miracle!
12/7/2020 • 27 minutes, 22 seconds
Unbreakable: The Broken (the offender)
Here's what you have to do to have a chance at reconciliation after a traumatic wound.
12/4/2020 • 18 minutes, 20 seconds
Unbreakable: Wounds vs Betrayal
Any type of betrayal can cause emotional distress, but you might experience lingering trauma when someone you depend on to respect your needs and generally help safeguard your well-being violates the trust you’ve placed in them.
https://www.smalleyinstitute.com/blog/unbreakable-wounds-vs-betrayal
12/3/2020 • 24 minutes, 35 seconds
New series about to start...Unbreakable
The thing you want most from your spouse is often what is broken the most! Trust. A new series is about to start, Unbreakable, Three Proven Strategies to Overcome Hurt, Betrayal, and Broken Promises So You Can Trust Again!
12/2/2020 • 5 minutes, 11 seconds
Help! Divorce is too expensive and homicide is illegal
An answer to the question, "Where do you get help when the only reason you are still married is that 1) divorce is too expensive, and 2) homicide is illegal. (No, this is not a prank question. The only reason I have stayed this long is the above. I have gotten some really bad advice over the years, most of it from 'Christian counselors' and clergy.)"
12/1/2020 • 17 minutes, 33 seconds
Do Life Differently and interview with Jeff Reeter
A special interview with Jeff Reeter! Countless books focus on leadership. Numerous podcasts and TedTalks speak about leading others, leading organizations, developing leaders, and so on. But before you can lead others well, much less discover real success or leave a legacy that others will remember you for, you must first learn to lead yourself.
11/25/2020 • 36 minutes, 23 seconds
What do I do if my husband is having an affair and I found out?
A deep question and an answer needing to be heard!
24/7 digital access to coaching from Dr. Michael Smalley, a path towards healing your pain, tools to shape your communication and intimacy, assessments to guide you, and a community of support from people who will cheer you on as you journey to the relationship you want. Join the VIP Inner Circle! Learn more. https://www.smalleyinstitute.com/vip
11/16/2020 • 18 minutes, 57 seconds
How does a wife get her husband to use her love language before, during and even after sex?
As always, there is something you need to ask yourself first.
24/7 digital access to coaching from Dr. Michael Smalley, a path towards healing your pain, tools to shape your communication and intimacy, assessments to guide you, and a community of support from people who will cheer you on as you journey to the relationship you want. Join the VIP Inner Circle! Learn more. https://www.smalleyinstitute.com/vip
11/13/2020 • 12 minutes, 50 seconds
When you fail big time do this
Just because your wife didn't get the grand gesture of love...
24/7 digital access to coaching from Dr. Michael Smalley, a path towards healing your pain, tools to shape your communication and intimacy, assessments to guide you, and a community of support from people who will cheer you on as you journey to the relationship you want. Join the VIP Inner Circle! Learn more. https://www.smalleyinstitute.com/vip
11/12/2020 • 13 minutes
Life Hack of the century!
You may not be a rule breaker...until you watch this! And learn how to actually calm down someone you've offended.
24/7 digital access to coaching from Dr. Michael Smalley, a path towards healing your pain, tools to shape your communication and intimacy, assessments to guide you, and a community of support from people who will cheer you on as you journey to the relationship you want. Join the VIP Inner Circle! Learn more. https://www.smalleyinstitute.com/vip
11/11/2020 • 12 minutes, 18 seconds
Negative beliefs are insane so do this!
This question was meant to be! While putting my notes together my wife did something that totally set me up to negative belief her to death!
24/7 digital access to coaching from Dr. Michael Smalley, a path towards healing your pain. Become a VIP! Learn more.
11/10/2020 • 15 minutes, 21 seconds
How do I deal with my wife's "daddy issues"?
The guy asked the question! You can't blame me for the answer.
24/7 digital access to coaching from Dr. Michael Smalley, a path towards healing your pain. Become a VIP! Learn more.
11/9/2020 • 13 minutes, 12 seconds
How can I make sex more attractive to my wife?
The answer that launched a thousand ships, filled by men, all asking the same question.
If an epic, in-depth online experience is something you’d be interested in covering the discussion today or access to any of the downloads mentioned, and even better, 24/7 digital access to coaching from Dr. Michael Smalley, a path towards healing your pain, tools to shape your communication and intimacy, assessments to guide you, and a community of support from people who will cheer you on as you journey to the relationship you want. Join the VIP Inner Circle! Learn more.
11/6/2020 • 15 minutes, 8 seconds
How much should I ask about an adulterous relationship that has ended?
"How much should I ask about an adulterous relationship that has ended?"
If an epic, in-depth online experience is something you’d be interested in covering the discussion today or access to any of the downloads mentioned, and even better, 24/7 digital access to coaching from Dr. Michael Smalley, a path towards healing your pain, tools to shape your communication and intimacy, assessments to guide you, and a community of support from people who will cheer you on as you journey to the relationship you want. Join the VIP Inner Circle! Learn more.
11/5/2020 • 12 minutes, 45 seconds
How do you deal with a sexless marriage?
"Sexless marriage. How can a spouse deal with this when they are not willing to talk about it and not willing to go to counseling? Married 9 years, no intimacy in over 4 years, and maybe 20 times in the other 5 years."
If an epic, in-depth online experience is something you’d be interested in covering the discussion today or access to any of the downloads mentioned, and even better, 24/7 digital access to coaching from Dr. Michael Smalley, a path towards healing your pain, tools to shape your communication and intimacy, assessments to guide you, and a community of support from people who will cheer you on as you journey to the relationship you want. Join the VIP Inner Circle! Learn more.
11/4/2020 • 17 minutes, 52 seconds
What does it mean for a wife to submit when it comes to sex?
If the word "submit" sparks a firestorm of negative emotions, then you really need to watch this one!
If an epic, in-depth online experience is something you’d be interested in covering the discussion today or access to any of the downloads mentioned, and even better, 24/7 digital access to coaching from Dr. Michael Smalley, a path towards healing your pain, tools to shape your communication and intimacy, assessments to guide you, and a community of support from people who will cheer you on as you journey to the relationship you want. Join the VIP Inner Circle! Learn more.
11/3/2020 • 11 minutes, 28 seconds
What is a man’s responsibility to meet the needs of his wife sexually?
Gentleman, you better be doing these three things or you are missing out!
If an epic, in-depth online experience is something you’d be interested in covering the discussion today or access to any of the downloads mentioned, and even better, 24/7 digital access to coaching from Dr. Michael Smalley, a path towards healing your pain, tools to shape your communication and intimacy, assessments to guide you, and a community of support from people who will cheer you on as you journey to the relationship you want. Join the VIP Inner Circle! Learn more.
11/2/2020 • 13 minutes, 44 seconds
Is your partner emotionally abusive?
It has to stop if it is true.
If an epic, in-depth online experience is something you’d be interested in covering the discussion today or access to any of the downloads mentioned, and even better, 24/7 digital access to coaching from Dr. Michael Smalley, a path towards healing your pain, tools to shape your communication and intimacy, assessments to guide you, and a community of support from people who will cheer you on as you journey to the relationship you want. Join the VIP Inner Circle! Learn more.
10/30/2020 • 16 minutes, 18 seconds
Do I have to give sex anytime my husband wants it?
It saddens me to answer this question.
If an epic, in-depth online experience is something you’d be interested in covering the discussion today or access to any of the downloads mentioned, and even better, 24/7 digital access to coaching from Dr. Michael Smalley, a path towards healing your pain, tools to shape your communication and intimacy, assessments to guide you, and a community of support from people who will cheer you on as you journey to the relationship you want. Join the VIP Inner Circle! Learn more.
10/29/2020 • 15 minutes, 49 seconds
What if in-laws don't respect boundaries
Are there any in-laws that respect boundaries?
If an epic, in-depth online experience is something you’d be interested in covering the discussion today or access to any of the downloads mentioned, and even better, 24/7 digital access to coaching from Dr. Michael Smalley, a path towards healing your pain, tools to shape your communication and intimacy, assessments to guide you, and a community of support from people who will cheer you on as you journey to the relationship you want. Join the VIP Inner Circle! Learn more.
10/28/2020 • 19 minutes, 22 seconds
What is the greatest predictor of success?
A fellow learner wants to know, "What is the single best predictor of whether a couple who goes through your program will make it."
If an epic, in-depth online experience is something you’d be interested in covering the discussion today or access to any of the downloads mentioned, and even better, 24/7 digital access to coaching from Dr. Michael Smalley, a path towards healing your pain, tools to shape your communication and intimacy, assessments to guide you, and a community of support from people who will cheer you on as you journey to the relationship you want. Join the VIP Inner Circle! Learn more.
10/27/2020 • 10 minutes, 35 seconds
How can I get my wife to love me again?
The problem may be with you trying to get her to love you again.
If an epic, in-depth online experience is something you’d be interested in covering the discussion today or access to any of the downloads mentioned, and even better, 24/7 digital access to coaching from Dr. Michael Smalley, a path towards healing your pain, tools to shape your communication and intimacy, assessments to guide you, and a community of support from people who will cheer you on as you journey to the relationship you want. Join the VIP Inner Circle! Learn more.
10/26/2020 • 10 minutes, 44 seconds
Is it always up to one spouse to instigate sex?
Is it always up to one spouse to instigate sex? Wouldn't it leave the instigator feeling under wanted if they are always having to start the festivities?
If an epic, in-depth online experience is something you’d be interested in covering the discussion today or access to any of the downloads mentioned, and even better, 24/7 digital access to coaching from Dr. Michael Smalley, a path towards healing your pain, tools to shape your communication and intimacy, assessments to guide you, and a community of support from people who will cheer you on as you journey to the relationship you want. Join the VIP Inner Circle! Learn more.
10/23/2020 • 13 minutes, 59 seconds
What if she does come back
It worked! Now you better get ready and do the following.
Join the free online community at www.smalleyinstitute.com and sign up for the Hero's Guide to Winning Back Your Wife! If you’re out there, and this title has grabbed your attention, then you’d better sign up for this powerful online course. Because if you don’t get the lessons down from this course, you won’t be able to do any of the things necessary to win back your wife’s heart. Join here.
10/22/2020 • 45 minutes, 45 seconds
What if she does not come back
Lack of control stinks!
Join the free online community at www.smalleyinstitute.com and sign up for the Hero's Guide to Winning Back Your Wife! If you’re out there, and this title has grabbed your attention, then you’d better sign up for this powerful online course. Because if you don’t get the lessons down from this course, you won’t be able to do any of the things necessary to win back your wife’s heart. Join here.
10/21/2020 • 1 hour, 1 minute, 40 seconds
The most important question you will ever ask
You never even thought of asking this!
Join the free online community at www.smalleyinstitute.com and sign up for the Hero's Guide to Winning Back Your Wife! If you’re out there, and this title has grabbed your attention, then you’d better sign up for this powerful online course. Because if you don’t get the lessons down from this course, you won’t be able to do any of the things necessary to win back your wife’s heart. Join here.
10/20/2020 • 46 minutes, 55 seconds
How a real man seeks forgiveness
You thought you knew how to apologize, but you were wrong!
Join the free online community at www.smalleyinstitute.com and sign up for the Hero's Guide to Winning Back Your Wife! If you’re out there, and this title has grabbed your attention, then you’d better sign up for this powerful online course. Because if you don’t get the lessons down from this course, you won’t be able to do any of the things necessary to win back your wife’s heart. Join here.
10/19/2020 • 39 minutes, 6 seconds
Why she is always right
It does not make sense but trust me, it's the only thing that works!
Join the free online community at www.smalleyinstitute.com and sign up for the Hero's Guide to Winning Back Your Wife! If you’re out there, and this title has grabbed your attention, then you’d better sign up for this powerful online course. Because if you don’t get the lessons down from this course, you won’t be able to do any of the things necessary to win back your wife’s heart. Join here.
10/16/2020 • 42 minutes, 12 seconds
It starts with you
The one thing you can do is this...
Join the free online community at www.smalleyinstitute.com and sign up for the Hero's Guide to Winning Back Your Wife! If you’re out there, and this title has grabbed your attention, then you’d better sign up for this powerful online course. Because if you don’t get the lessons down from this course, you won’t be able to do any of the things necessary to win back your wife’s heart. Join here.
10/15/2020 • 44 minutes, 21 seconds
Every Hero has been humbled
The awesome power of terrible choices and the end result of humility.
Join the free online community at www.smalleyinstitute.com and sign up for the Hero's Guide to Winning Back Your Wife! If you’re out there, and this title has grabbed your attention, then you’d better sign up for this powerful online course. Because if you don’t get the lessons down from this course, you won’t be able to do any of the things necessary to win back your wife’s heart. Join here.
10/14/2020 • 32 minutes, 30 seconds
How you lost her in the first place
It's the answer to one of your biggest questions, "How'd this happen?"
Join the free online community at www.smalleyinstitute.com and sign up for the Hero's Guide to Winning Back Your Wife! If you’re out there, and this title has grabbed your attention, then you’d better sign up for this powerful online course. Because if you don’t get the lessons down from this course, you won’t be able to do any of the things necessary to win back your wife’s heart. Join here.
10/13/2020 • 42 minutes, 47 seconds
Who's your daddy? The Hero's Guide to Winning Back Your Wife
You feel it's time to dial 911 for your marriage! But who is going to answer?
Join the free online community at www.smalleyinstitute.com and sign up for the Hero's Guide to Winning Back Your Wife! More than ever before, you have to know the pitfalls and radical things you must do in order to win back the heart of your wife. You can do it! You just better know how to win this battle. Join here.
10/12/2020 • 47 minutes, 12 seconds
Become Unbreakable
This is the one I've been looking to the most! Actual tears when I discovered it and then created my notes for the show!
If an epic, in-depth online experience is something you’d be interested in covering the discussion today or access to any of the downloads mentioned, and even better, 24/7 digital access to coaching from Dr. Michael Smalley, a path towards healing your pain, tools to shape your communication and intimacy, assessments to guide you, and a community of support from people who will cheer you on as you journey to the relationship you want. Join the VIP Inner Circle! Learn more.
10/9/2020 • 22 minutes, 18 seconds
A.R.E. You ready!
We've turned the corner and you are ready to turn betrayal into deeper intimacy!
If an epic, in-depth online experience is something you’d be interested in covering the discussion today or access to any of the downloads mentioned, and even better, 24/7 digital access to coaching from Dr. Michael Smalley, a path towards healing your pain, tools to shape your communication and intimacy, assessments to guide you, and a community of support from people who will cheer you on as you journey to the relationship you want. Join the VIP Inner Circle! Learn more.
10/8/2020 • 20 minutes, 54 seconds
Let it go and flush
We are turning the corner on Primal Panic and focusing in on genuine healing! Now drop whatever you are doing and flush it.
If an epic, in-depth online experience is something you’d be interested in covering the discussion today or access to any of the downloads mentioned, and even better, 24/7 digital access to coaching from Dr. Michael Smalley, a path towards healing your pain, tools to shape your communication and intimacy, assessments to guide you, and a community of support from people who will cheer you on as you journey to the relationship you want. Join the VIP Inner Circle! Learn more.
10/7/2020 • 11 minutes, 14 seconds
The Lover: Primal Panic Reaction
This is who you want to be if you ever want to overcome the pain of feeling betrayed.
If an epic, in-depth online experience is something you’d be interested in covering the discussion today or access to any of the downloads mentioned, and even better, 24/7 digital access to coaching from Dr. Michael Smalley, a path towards healing your pain, tools to shape your communication and intimacy, assessments to guide you, and a community of support from people who will cheer you on as you journey to the relationship you want. Join the VIP Inner Circle! Learn more.
10/6/2020 • 9 minutes, 54 seconds
The Runner: Primal Panic
"We need to talk." Possibly the four worst words this style of panic reaction could ever hear!
If an epic, in-depth online experience is something you’d be interested in covering the discussion today or access to any of the downloads mentioned, and even better, 24/7 digital access to coaching from Dr. Michael Smalley, a path towards healing your pain, tools to shape your communication and intimacy, assessments to guide you, and a community of support from people who will cheer you on as you journey to the relationship you want. Join the VIP Inner Circle! Learn more.
10/5/2020 • 15 minutes, 25 seconds
The Fighter: Primal Panic
Ever feel like your words and actions were not achieving the deepest desire of your heart? You keep reacting in ways that push people further and further away?
If an epic, in-depth online experience is something you’d be interested in covering the discussion today or access to any of the downloads mentioned, and even better, 24/7 digital access to coaching from Dr. Michael Smalley, a path towards healing your pain, tools to shape your communication and intimacy, assessments to guide you, and a community of support from people who will cheer you on as you journey to the relationship you want. Join the VIP Inner Circle! Learn more.
9/29/2020 • 19 minutes, 52 seconds
Born from betrayal: Primal Panic!
When primal panic sets in, watch out! Your heart is in the right place but your words and actions keep pushing your loved ones further away.
If an epic, in-depth online experience is something you’d be interested in covering the discussion today or access to any of the downloads mentioned, and even better, 24/7 digital access to coaching from Dr. Michael Smalley, a path towards healing your pain, tools to shape your communication and intimacy, assessments to guide you, and a community of support from people who will cheer you on as you journey to the relationship you want. Join the VIP Inner Circle! Learn more.
9/28/2020 • 34 minutes, 8 seconds
The mathematical formula for your best life now!
I've done it! Had one of those mornings where I figured out the mathematical formula for your best life now!
If an epic, in-depth online experience is something you’d be interested in covering the discussion today or access to any of the downloads mentioned, and even better, 24/7 digital access to coaching from Dr. Michael Smalley, a path towards healing your pain, tools to shape your communication and intimacy, assessments to guide you, and a community of support from people who will cheer you on as you journey to the relationship you want. Join the VIP Inner Circle! Learn more.
9/25/2020 • 12 minutes, 32 seconds
Primal Panic
Sounds scary! It should! When a woman reaches the level of a primal panic, you better know exactly what to do next.
If an epic, in-depth online experience is something you’d be interested in covering the discussion today or access to any of the downloads mentioned, and even better, 24/7 digital access to coaching from Dr. Michael Smalley, a path towards healing your pain, tools to shape your communication and intimacy, assessments to guide you, and a community of support from people who will cheer you on as you journey to the relationship you want. Join the VIP Inner Circle! Learn more.
9/24/2020 • 7 minutes, 8 seconds
What if he DOES come back
Amen, hallelujah! But you better have a plan on what you do daily, weekly, and yearly.
If an epic, in-depth online experience is something you’d be interested in covering the discussion today or access to any of the downloads mentioned, and even better, 24/7 digital access to coaching from Dr. Michael Smalley, a path towards healing your pain, tools to shape your communication and intimacy, assessments to guide you, and a community of support from people who will cheer you on as you journey to the relationship you want. Join the VIP Inner Circle! Learn more.
9/23/2020 • 9 minutes, 46 seconds
What if he does not come back
It is the answer to the question you fear the most. What now?
If an epic, in-depth online experience is something you’d be interested in covering the discussion today or access to any of the downloads mentioned, and even better, 24/7 digital access to coaching from Dr. Michael Smalley, a path towards healing your pain, tools to shape your communication and intimacy, assessments to guide you, and a community of support from people who will cheer you on as you journey to the relationship you want. Join the VIP Inner Circle! Learn more. https://www.smalleyinstitute.com/#section-1597255271154
9/22/2020 • 15 minutes, 2 seconds
Be brave and disengage
The #1 reason your relationship will fail is if you continue allowing yourself to stay engaged with your husband when you become flooded. Here's what you need to do...
If an epic, in-depth online experience is something you’d be interested in covering the discussion today or access to any of the downloads mentioned, and even better, 24/7 digital access to coaching from Dr. Michael Smalley, a path towards healing your pain, tools to shape your communication and intimacy, assessments to guide you, and a community of support from people who will cheer you on as you journey to the relationship you want. Join the VIP Inner Circle! Learn more.
9/21/2020 • 20 minutes, 46 seconds
Do not rush it
The last thing you want to do is rush the process of healing. You might want to consider a much better alternative.
If an epic, in-depth online experience is something you’d be interested in covering the discussion today or access to any of the downloads mentioned, and even better, 24/7 digital access to coaching from Dr. Michael Smalley, a path towards healing your pain, tools to shape your communication and intimacy, assessments to guide you, and a community of support from people who will cheer you on as you journey to the relationship you want. Join the VIP Inner Circle! Learn more.
9/18/2020 • 12 minutes, 22 seconds
Take a risk
What else do you have to lose? If you really want him back, take the risk.
If an epic, in-depth online experience is something you’d be interested in covering the discussion today or access to any of the downloads mentioned, and even better, 24/7 digital access to coaching from Dr. Michael Smalley, a path towards healing your pain, tools to shape your communication and intimacy, assessments to guide you, and a community of support from people who will cheer you on as you journey to the relationship you want. Join the VIP Inner Circle! Learn more.
9/17/2020 • 16 minutes, 45 seconds
Your best option is to quit
You heard me! Quit already, you keep trying to eliminate divorce and you are only making it worse.
If an epic, in-depth online experience is something you’d be interested in covering the discussion today or access to any of the downloads mentioned, and even better, 24/7 digital access to coaching from Dr. Michael Smalley, a path towards healing your pain, tools to shape your communication and intimacy, assessments to guide you, and a community of support from people who will cheer you on as you journey to the relationship you want. Join the VIP Inner Circle! Learn more.
9/16/2020 • 25 minutes, 12 seconds
Fast and pray for the love of life!
Want to know what happens when you ignore God before making important life decisions? You know what happens...
If an epic, in-depth online experience is something you’d be interested in covering the discussion today or access to any of the downloads mentioned, and even better, 24/7 digital access to coaching from Dr. Michael Smalley, a path towards healing your pain, tools to shape your communication and intimacy, assessments to guide you, and a community of support from people who will cheer you on as you journey to the relationship you want. Join the VIP Inner Circle! Learn more.
9/15/2020 • 18 minutes, 37 seconds
Bewildered God is Not (maybe Yoda)
You might feel bewildered about why your husband is shut down, God does not.
If an epic, in-depth online experience is something you’d be interested in covering the discussion today or access to any of the downloads mentioned, and even better, 24/7 digital access to coaching from Dr. Michael Smalley, a path towards healing your pain, tools to shape your communication and intimacy, assessments to guide you, and a community of support from people who will cheer you on as you journey to the relationship you want. Join the VIP Inner Circle! Learn more.
9/14/2020 • 23 minutes, 7 seconds
You are a child of the King! Now go live like one.
If you don't know who you truly are, the essence of what defines you, then good luck! A broken identity is a broken life. Be an Esther and win back your husband when you embrace the truth of being a child of the King.
If an epic, in-depth online experience is something you’d be interested in covering the discussion today or access to any of the downloads mentioned, and even better, 24/7 digital access to coaching from Dr. Michael Smalley, a path towards healing your pain, tools to shape your communication and intimacy, assessments to guide you, and a community of support from people who will cheer you on as you journey to the relationship you want. Join the VIP Inner Circle! Learn more.
9/11/2020 • 27 minutes, 57 seconds
The invisible God - Be an Esther
One of the glaring omissions in the book of Esther is God. Yes, you are reading this correctly! We do not know who wrote the book of Esther. If you read it, you are not going to read about God. Fact-check me on this one.
The rest of my notes are in the VIP Inner Circle membership. 24/7 digital access to coaching from Dr. Michael Smalley (me), a growing library of videos, a path towards healing your pain, tools to shape your communication and intimacy, assessments to guide you, and a community of support from people who will cheer you on as you journey to the relationship you want. START NOW
9/10/2020 • 18 minutes, 34 seconds
Be an Esther and Win Back Your Husband!
Welcome to Be an Esther and Win Back Your Husband online experience! It is an honor to be part of your journey in winning back the heart of your husband. I want to share something important straight away, which may come as a shock to you……... I am not a woman. Phew! Got that off my chest!
The rest of my notes are in the VIP Inner Circle membership. 24/7 digital access to coaching from Dr. Michael Smalley (me), a growing library of videos, a path towards healing your pain, tools to shape your communication and intimacy, assessments to guide you, and a community of support from people who will cheer you on as you journey to the relationship you want. START NOW
9/9/2020 • 14 minutes, 50 seconds
Break free from generational sin
You know that thing you swore you'd never do because of how much you were hurt by it from your parents? Today we learn how to stop doing it ourselves.
The rest of my notes are in the VIP Inner Circle membership. 24/7 digital access to coaching from Dr. Michael Smalley (me), a growing library of videos, a path towards healing your pain, tools to shape your communication and intimacy, assessments to guide you, and a community of support from people who will cheer you on as you journey to the relationship you want. START NOW
9/7/2020 • 26 minutes, 5 seconds
Protect your family
For real! You might be unaware of a force hell-bent on destroying your family.
The VIP Inner Circle membership brings you 24/7 digital access to coaching from Dr. Michael Smalley, a growing library of videos, a path towards healing your pain, tools to shape your communication and intimacy, assessments to guide you, and a community of support from people who will cheer you on as you journey to the relationship you want. https://www.smalleyinstitute.com/#section-1597255271154
9/4/2020 • 57 minutes, 57 seconds
Is it a curse or a consequence?
What's the source of your failed attempts at turning your relationship and life around? A curse or a consequence? Listen and find out.
The VIP Inner Circle membership brings you 24/7 digital access to coaching from Dr. Michael Smalley, a growing library of videos, a path towards healing your pain, tools to shape your communication and intimacy, assessments to guide you, and a community of support from people who will cheer you on as you journey to the relationship you want.
https://www.smalleyinstitute.com/#section-1597255271154
9/3/2020 • 21 minutes, 46 seconds
You have no other choice
If we claim to follow Jesus, this command is unavoidable and perhaps the most important one!
The VIP Inner Circle membership brings you 24/7 digital access to coaching from Dr. Michael Smalley, a growing library of videos, a path towards healing your pain, tools to shape your communication and intimacy, assessments to guide you, and a community of support from people who will cheer you on as you journey to the relationship you want.
https://www.smalleyinstitute.com/#section-1597255271154
9/2/2020 • 15 minutes, 42 seconds
3 ways to supernatural peace
What are the CHOICES we make leading to a miserable life and how do we solve it?
9/1/2020 • 13 minutes, 15 seconds
Reframing the worst sin of all
How on earth can your selfishness ever contribute to the happiness of other people?
If you want the rest of my notes for this podcast, the downloads mentioned, and more importantly, weekly support and encouragement for your deepest relationship dreams. Join the VIP Inner Circle today! Change is a process and takes time, a VIP Inner Circle membership is the process and allows you the time to build the relationship you want. START NOW
https://www.smalleyinstitute.com/#section-1597255271154
8/31/2020 • 16 minutes, 9 seconds
Love the sucky people
It's a moment I'll never forget, still one of the most embarrassing, humiliating experiences haunting me to this day.
If you want the rest of my notes for this podcast, the downloads mentioned, and more importantly, weekly support and encouragement for your deepest relationship dreams. Join the VIP Inner Circle today! Change is a process and takes time, a VIP Inner Circle membership is the process and allows you the time to build the relationship you want. START NOW
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8/28/2020 • 21 minutes, 47 seconds
Crushing our holier-than-thou hearts
At 18-years-old God broke me of the worst sin of all!
If you want the rest of my notes for this podcast, the downloads mentioned, and more importantly, weekly support and encouragement for your deepest relationship struggles...join the VIP Inner Circle today! Change is a process and takes time, a VIP Inner Circle membership is the process and allows you the time to build the life and relationship you want. START NOW
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8/27/2020 • 13 minutes, 18 seconds
The war worth fighting
It was war and a threat to my life and the risk, eternal separation from God!
If you want the rest of my notes for this podcast, the downloads mentioned, and more importantly, weekly support and encouragement for your deepest relationship struggles...join the VIP Inner Circle today! Change is a process and takes time, a VIP Inner Circle membership is the process and allows you the time to build the life and relationship you want. START NOW
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8/26/2020 • 11 minutes, 19 seconds
Furious no more
Mark and Christine thought it would be a great idea, and they were wrong! What did they do, and how did it end?
If you want the rest of my notes for this podcast, and any downloads mentioned, more importantly, weekly support and encouragement for your deepest relationship struggles...join the VIP Inner Circle today! Change is a process and takes time, a VIP Inner Circle membership is the process and allows you the time to build the life and relationship you want.
https://www.smalleyinstitute.com/#section-1597255271154
8/25/2020 • 14 minutes, 51 seconds
Be joy - first of the eight commands of Jesus you can't ignore
Choice. Believe it or not, you always have a choice. Even when it involves joy in hurtful or difficult circumstances. Learn how to choose joy today!
If you want the rest of my notes for this podcast, the downloads mentioned, and more importantly, weekly support and encouragement for your deepest relationship struggles...join the VIP Inner Circle today! Change is a process and takes time, a VIP Inner Circle membership is the process and allows you the time to build the life and relationship you want. START NOW
https://www.smalleyinstitute.com/#section-1597255271154
8/24/2020 • 17 minutes, 42 seconds
Take your marriage to the next level
Taking your marriage to the next level requires something of you, discover what that something is today!
If you want the rest of my notes for this podcast, the downloads mentioned, and more importantly, weekly support and encouragement for your deepest relationship struggles...join the VIP Inner Circle today! Change is a process and takes time, a VIP Inner Circle membership is the process and allows you the time to build the life and relationship you want. https://www.smalleyinstitute.com/#section-1597255271154
8/21/2020 • 22 minutes
Anchor your relationship in joy
Today is about joy. I bet you did not see this coming! Your relationship can feel scary at times. Are we going to make it? Is he/she ever going to change? Will I survive my current circumstances? Where does your joy, confidence, security, satisfaction, calm-in-the-storm come from? Read more at www.smalleyinstitute.com
If you want the rest of my notes for this podcast, the downloads mentioned, and more importantly, weekly support and encouragement for your deepest relationship struggles...join the VIP Inner Circle today! Change is a process and takes time, a VIP Inner Circle membership is the process and allows you the time to build the life and relationship you want. START NOW
https://www.smalleyinstitute.com/#section-1597255271154
8/20/2020 • 29 minutes, 2 seconds
Take it easy with curiosity
John's been a bad boy! He's allowed something destructive into his mind, but today we learn how to get rid of it! Would you like ongoing support and encouragement for your relationship? Join the VIP Inner Circle today! https://www.smalleyinstitute.com/vip-inner-circle
8/19/2020 • 17 minutes, 6 seconds
The power of a Sacred Pause
"The most important thing in life is to stop saying 'I wish' and start saying 'I will.' Consider nothing impossible, then treat possibilities as probabilities." Charles Dickens wrote that, and this week you are about to learn the most important strategy for your relationship to succeed. Before you become flooded, and incapable of loving each other well, take a Sacred Pause. It's really the only way you can get through difficult conversations and come out closer than ever.
Get personal help for your relationship ever week! Join the VIP Inner Circle: https://www.smalleyinstitute.com/vip-inner-circle
8/18/2020 • 15 minutes, 42 seconds
4 Repulsive reactions you have to stop now
The Urban Dictionary defines repulsive as, "Something or someone that is gross and provokes disgust; disgusting." Let me ask you something, is this your goal each day you wake up lying next to the person you chose to spend the rest of your life together?
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8/17/2020 • 13 minutes, 52 seconds
The one thing you can't do
When is the last time you heard, "You never do anything! I have to do everything around here!" Or at least some version of an irritated, angry, frustrated, overwhelmed, or disgusting statement of fact leaving you feeling like a failure or judged. Today, together, we are going to eliminate this kind of hullabaloo.
Get the help you deserve, become a VIP Inner Circle member today! https://www.smalleyinstitute.com/vip-inner-circle
8/14/2020 • 9 minutes, 36 seconds
How about trying NOT being a jerk
Join the movement! Become a VIP Inner Circle member today and get the help you need for the marriage you want. https://www.smalleyinstitute.com/vip-inner-circle
8/13/2020 • 14 minutes, 8 seconds
Move from adversaries to teammates
In a six-year longitudinal study performed by John Gottman and Sybil Carrère, they discovered that they could predict the likelihood of a couple’s divorce by observing just the first three minutes of a conflict discussion. Join the VIP Inner Circle: https://www.smalleyinstitute.com/vip-inner-circle for daily live Q&A with me!
8/12/2020 • 14 minutes, 54 seconds
The joy of difficult conversations
The joy of difficult conversations will lead you to the marriage you want. https://www.smalleyinstitute.com/blog/the-joy-of-difficult-conversations
8/11/2020 • 18 minutes, 37 seconds
How to have a difficult conversation
Today we learn how to have a difficult conversation. You’re going to learn about, wait for it, cue the dramatic music...the the soft start-up. https://www.smalleyinstitute.com/blog/how-to-have-a-difficult-conversation
8/10/2020 • 10 minutes, 51 seconds
Never quit, never surrender - The Warrior's Marriage
I’m continuing in the series, The Warriors Marriage, today is perhaps the simplest concept and the hardest way to be a warrior in your marriage. Your marriage is hard, circumstances seem impossible, now get over it.
8/4/2020 • 19 minutes, 47 seconds
Weapons of Mass Destruction - The Warrior's Marriage Part 2
Today is the 2nd part of my series on the warrior’s marriage, and you’re not going to like it...well...you’ll eventually like it but first I have to shove a few things down your throat for a second, maybe a minute. “Welcome to the Inspiritaitonal Comedy podcast with Michael Smalley, learning doesn’t have to be boring!” https://www.smalleyinstitute.com/blog/weapons-of-mass-destruction-the-warrior-s-marriage-part-2
7/27/2020 • 12 minutes, 28 seconds
SPECIAL: Do you ever feel flooded in arguments?
Free live webinar August 7th for couples who are tired of ugly conflicts! Register today: https://www.smalleyinstitute.com/offers/FooijErY
7/23/2020 • 2 minutes, 50 seconds
The Warriors Marriage Part One
All the notes and extra goodies available on this podcast episodes page: https://www.smalleyinstitute.com/blog/the-warriors-marriage-part-one
Who are you? Developing a powerful sense of your identity.
7/20/2020 • 24 minutes, 37 seconds
You gotta believe it to get it - morning devos for couples
Get the notes, questions, and more by signing up for the devotionals: https://www.smalleyinstitute.com/offers/Uop2oaXJ
5/20/2020 • 8 minutes, 20 seconds
The overwhelming power of gentleness - morning devos for couples
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5/19/2020 • 8 minutes, 5 seconds
Serve each other - morning devos for couples
Sign up for the 28 day morning devotional to get notes, video and more: https://www.smalleyinstitute.com/offers/Uop2oaXJ
5/18/2020 • 8 minutes, 17 seconds
Value each other - morning devos for couples
Get the notes, videos, and audio to these morning devos here: https://www.smalleyinstitute.com/offers/Uop2oaXJ
5/15/2020 • 7 minutes, 40 seconds
What are you worked up about?
You can join the online course for instant access to the audio and video to each devotional along with the notes and question: https://www.smalleyinstitute.com/offers/Uop2oaXJ
5/14/2020 • 9 minutes, 24 seconds
The Love Language of Christ - Morning Devo for Couples
You can sign up for the morning devo online experience and get the notes and video for each devotional: https://www.smalleyinstitute.com/offers/Uop2oaXJ
5/13/2020 • 14 minutes, 35 seconds
Abide in Him - morning devo for couples
If you want all the morning devos in one place go here: https://www.smalleyinstitute.com/offers/Uop2oaXJ
4/30/2020 • 18 minutes, 24 seconds
The cost of freedom - morning devo for couples
28 statements from Jesus that will transform your marriage! Sign up for the 28 day course here and the the notes and audio: https://www.smalleyinstitute.com/offers/Uop2oaXJ
4/29/2020 • 16 minutes, 32 seconds
Repent - Morning Devos for Couples
Get the full show notes and discussion questions here: https://www.smalleyinstitute.com/blog/repent-matthew-4-17
4/28/2020 • 16 minutes, 19 seconds
The time I kissed a girl and then...
Day 6
Yesterday I shared the time I was patient zero in a meningitis outbreak in Conroe Texas. Today you get to hear when I was patient zero at Kanakuk Kamp in Branson Missouri! It involves my first ever kiss with a girl I wasn’t dating and more!
BUILD A BETTER LIFE WITH…
Virtual Intensives are here! 3hr, 1 day, 2 days and 3 days options.
https://www.smalleyinstitute.com/smalley-virtual-intensives
Turn your relationship around during the quarantine with one of our powerful online courses.
https://www.smalleyinstitute.com/store
The Comedy of Love, this isn’t just some show, it’s a comedic learning experience! https://www.smalleyinstitute.com/comedy-of-love
Real or Messed up Quarantine Family Fun Tips
Exploding Kittens
YOU PUT THE CARDS ON THE TABLE AND TAKE TURNS DRAWING FROM THEM.
Playing Exploding Kittens
IF YOU DRAW AN EXPLODING KITTEN CARD, YOU EXPLODE. WHEN YOU EXPLODE, YOU DIE AND YOU'RE OUT OF THE GAME. UNLESS! YOU PLAY A DEFUSE CARD, WHICH WILL STOP THE KITTEN FROM EXPLODING USING THINGS LIKE LASER POINTERS, KITTEN YOGA, AND CATNIP SANDWICHES.
$8.7 million raised in Kickstarter.
Passive Aggressive Pugs
First, I’m starting a kickstarter campaign and I only want $3.5 million! The game is simple, all the cards are blank. You get to fill in the cards with complaints about your spouse, children, parents, siblings or friends. The goal is to get your loved ones to discover the different ways they frustrate you. But make sure and don’t be too blunt. If the other player realizes the complaint is about them, you explode…literally!
STORY TIME
The time I almost shot my doctor
The kissing fiasco!
BUILD A BETTER LIFE WITH…
Virtual Intensives are here! 3hr, 1 day, 2 days and 3 days options.
https://www.smalleyinstitute.com/smalley-virtual-intensives
Turn your relationship around during the quarantine with one of our powerful online courses.
https://www.smalleyinstitute.com/store
The Comedy of Love, this isn’t just some show, it’s a comedic learning experience! https://www.smalleyinstitute.com/comedy-of-love
4/1/2020 • 57 minutes, 28 seconds
That time I was abducted in India
Day 5 - Abducted in India
Today’s show features a game you can play as a family, it’s my own family’s favorite game! I’ll just give you the subtitle which says it all…”Build a Unicorn Army. Betray your friends. Unicorns are your friends now.” And then, you’ll get the story of when I was abducted in India. Yes, I’ve been abducted before and you won’t believe what it lead to!
BUILD A BETTER LIFE WITH…
Virtual Intensives are here! 3hr, 1 day, 2 days and 3 days options.
https://www.smalleyinstitute.com/smalley-virtual-intensives
Turn your relationship around during the quarantine with one of our powerful online courses.
https://www.smalleyinstitute.com/store
The Comedy of Love, this isn’t just some show, it’s a comedic learning experience! https://www.smalleyinstitute.com/comedy-of-love
Unstable Unicorns is a strategic card game about everyone’s two favorite things: Destruction and Unicorns!
From the back of the box:
Learn how unstable your friendships really are.
You start with a Baby Unicorn in your Stable. SO CUTE!
But don't get too attached, because even Baby Unicorns aren't safe in this game! There are over 20 Magical Unicorns to collect, and each has a special power. Build your Unicorn Army as fast as you can, or be destroyed by one of your so-called friends! Seek revenge or protect your stable using your Magic! Sound easy? Not so fast. Someone could have a Neigh Card (Get it? Neigh?) and send the game into MADNESS! The first person to complete their Unicorn Army shall hereafter be known as The Righteous Ruler of All Things Magical... at least until the next game. Good luck.
THE STORY
When I got abducted in India!
Promise Keepers (Coach McCartney and Henry Blackaby) “Experiencing God”
Traveling alone for 48 hours….airport a man that looked like a character in a Dick Tracey movie!
Dead people in Rajahmundry
Confronting the leader
The train fro hell!
11 flights to get from Visakhapatnam to Mumbai
The Holy Spirit and ATM’s
The dark
Getting back to airport
And lastly…
Virtual Intensives are here! 3hr, 1 day, 2 days and 3 days options.
https://www.smalleyinstitute.com/smalley-virtual-intensives
Turn your relationship around during the quarantine with one of our powerful online courses.
https://www.smalleyinstitute.com/store
The Comedy of Love, this isn’t just some show, it’s a comedic learning experience! https://www.smalleyinstitute.com/comedy-of-love
3/31/2020 • 57 minutes, 28 seconds
A man's worst fear
Day 4 - Surprise colon exams
On today’s Comedy Hour (not quite an hour) America is great again, Real or Messed up Quarantine Family Fun Tips and a man’s worst fear…surprise colon checks!
New York retired doctors and nurses!
BUILD A BETTER LIFE!
Virtual Intensives are here! 3hr, 1 day, 2 days and 3 days options.
https://www.smalleyinstitute.com/smalley-virtual-intensives
Turn your relationship around during the quarantine with one of our powerful online courses.
https://www.smalleyinstitute.com/store
The Comedy of Love, this isn’t just some show, it’s a comedic learning experience! https://www.smalleyinstitute.com/comedy-of-love
Real or Messed up Quarantine Family Fun Tips
The Great Race, Coronavirus Edition
Get your family out and about your town or city and see who…ok, I can’t take this one any further, and honestly, I just wanted to make sure everyone knew about the latest Darwin Award winner!
Here’s the headline from The Mirror: The so-called 'coronavirus challenge' began after a TikTok influencer shared a clip of herself licking a plane toilet seat as someone says "it's corona time"
Here’s a pic of the moron in America licking a toilet!
He’s now in the hospital crying because he shockingly got coronavirus!
LifeHack.org has a brilliant tip: Go on a Neighborhood Color Walk
For a fun and healthy home-adventure, take your kids on a color walk around the neighborhood! Get the children to choose which color you are starting with, and as you walk, let them “collect” things of that color by shouting out the object’s name (kind of like ‘I spy’). Anyone can change the color at any time. Here is one account of a Mom who “let the rainbow guide her feet”!
STORYTIME
Tick on my woohoo
BUILD A BETTER LIFE WITH…
Virtual Intensives are here! 3hr, 1 day, 2 days and 3 days options.
https://www.smalleyinstitute.com/smalley-virtual-intensives
Turn your relationship around during the quarantine with one of our powerful online courses.
https://www.smalleyinstitute.com/store
The Comedy of Love, this isn’t just some show, it’s a comedic learning experience! https://www.smalleyinstitute.com/comedy-of-love
3/27/2020 • 24 minutes, 56 seconds
The great poop attack of 2003
Day 3 of the Michael Smalley Comedy Hour (not really an hour)
It was possibly 2003, honestly I can’t remember the year, but that’s not important. Today I share one of the most embarrassing moments of my life, and again it was at the diabolical hands of my older brother.
You won’t believe this story, but every detail is true!
But today isn’t just about my personal shame. The corona virus has caused a lot of anxiety and fear for many of you. So I’m going to give some simple tips on dealing with the angst this pandemic is causing.
BUT FIRST, A MOMENT TO BEG FOR YOUR MONEY!
Virtual Intensives are here! https://www.smalleyinstitute.com/smalley-virtual-intensives and, since live events will be coming back, bring a poor comedian to your church, organization or even family home. Check out how easy it is to host The Comedy of Love: https://www.smalleyinstitute.com/comedy-of-love
FAMILY TIPS FOR QUARANTINE
Play hide and seek
Play hide and lock
This game is unique and takes some early planning, but parents will love it! First thing, about 30 days before you play hide and lock you need to subtly drop hints to your kids that specific rooms would be a great hiding place. It’s called subliminal manipulation, which would make Dr. Spock proud. After 30 days you get your kids excited about playing hide and lock. Of course, since you’ve been subtly manipulating their minds for 30 days you know exactly where they are going to hide. The fun part is they are hiding in rooms where there is no escape. Unknown to your kids you have outfitted each door with a special locking system so they will remain in the room locked in until you let them out at your leisure.
MY MOST EMBARRASSING STORY EVER IS COMING UP RIGHT AFTER THESE TIPS FOR HANDLING STRESS AND ANXIETY
Here’s the first thing you have to hear, and it’s not going to be easy to receive. But the reality is that the more anxiety and stress you have over coronavirus, the more you become vulnerable in catching coronavirus.
PSYCHIATRIST SALLY-ANNE SOAMESON wrote: How Cortisol Weakens the Immune System.
Cortisol weakens your immune system for a good reason. During periods of intense stress,cortisol attempts to reduce inflammation by weakening some of the antibodies that can increase inflammation. It also turns on natural immunity (the ability to fight off problems immediately) and moves resources away from specific immunities (the ability to prevent diseases your body knows how to control).
But cortisol is only helpful in short bursts. When you experience prolonged stress, your body needs those T-cells and white blood cells, and unfortunately, cortisol continues to suppress them, thus weakening your immune system over time.
Tip #1 Exercise and eat well
Now I can relate to this one! One of my former go to coping mechanisms when stressed out was to eat everything. It took gastric bypass to cure me of that problem. But most of you haven’t gone that direction nor do you need to. Right now it’s important to recognize the importance of eating well and exercising on a regular basis during one of the most global crises since WW2.
Tip #2 Plan, Plan, Plan
One of the biggest issues causing so much stress and anxiety is that there is so much unknown about this virus and the media has lost control! Do any of you remember the Summer of the Shark Attack? It was covered as much as coronavirus, but the interesting thing is that during the Summer of the Shark Attack, there were actually fewer shark attacks than previous Summers!
Start planning for worst case scenarios. Stock up on nonperishable goods. Begin brainstorming and researching online different activities you can do with your kids. Look into online schooling options. Talk to your boss about options of working at home. The more control you feel the less stress you will experience.
Tip #3 Lack of sleep is not an option
Binge watching streaming services is fun, but don’t let that prevent you from at least six hours of sleep. If you’re struggling getting asleep or staying asleep, talk to your doctor. I just got a great sleeping pill from my doctor that has allowed me to finally get a solid six. Turn off the TV, try reading, or even listen to your favorite podcast (that’s worked great for me).
Before I get to the story, I have a short sponsor commercial....oh wait, I forgot, I have no sponsors!
THE STORY
Now, for the most embarrassing story of my life! The great poop attack of 2003 (I think).
LAST BUT NOT LEAST!
Virtual Intensives are here! https://www.smalleyinstitute.com/smalley-virtual-intensives and, since live events will be coming back, bring a poor comedian to your church, organization or even family home. Check out how easy it is to host The Comedy of Love: https://www.smalleyinstitute.com/comedy-of-love
3/25/2020 • 33 minutes, 15 seconds
The monster under your bed is real!
Welcommen to The Michael Smalley Comedy Hour. Because I’m impulsive and slightly unorganized, I only came up with this show idea on Sunday….which means I didn’t put a lot of thought into it. But for day two, I’ve got something special planned. Each day I’m going to give fun tips for your family during home quarantine. One tip will be legit and the other will be messed up, you’ll have to figure out which is which.
Of course I will share a weird, funny or messed up story from my life that will be true, or will it? At the end of my story you can comment on whether or not you think it’s true or fake news…I mean a fake story.
BUT FIRST, A MOMENT TO BEG FOR YOUR MONEY!
Virtual Intensives are here! https://www.smalleyinstitute.com/smalley-virtual-intensives and, since live events will be coming back, bring a poor comedian to your church, organization or even family home. Check out how easy it is to host The Comedy of Love: https://www.smalleyinstitute.com/comedy-of-love
Now, Time for Real or Messed Up Family Tip of the Day:
Marshmallow Tinkertoys (https://www.parents.com/fun/activities/indoor/kids-indoor-games-activities/)
A bag of marshmallows and some thin pretzel sticks are all you need to build the perfect puffy pal, a 3-D house, or tepee. Your child simply skewers the marshmallows with the sticks to create his own masterpiece. Add to the fun by placing toy pigs or other animals in the house and challenging your child to be the big bad wolf and blow it down.
The Big Bad Wolf
Now this game is amazing! Find a real life big bad wolf and release him in your house. Make sure you have all the doors shut and locked (you might even consider adding a pad lock to each door and swallow the keys so no one can wimp out and escape the game time fun.) The rules are simple, your goal is to be the last family member alive by finding the perfect place to hide from the actual wolf. Last family member standing is the champion forever!
NOW IT’S TIME FOR STORY TIME
I’m 46 years old and terrified of the dark. But don’t judge me! I grew up with an older brother, five years my senior, which gave him a huge advantage. Especially since I was not and still not the sharpest tool in the shed!
Freddy Kruger was literally under my bed.
WEIRD NEWS OF THE DAY
I’m beginning to think I may have big brother issues, and this is why! My own brother texted me a link the other day to an article referencing a story. This was the headline: Guys, Have an Older Brother? It May Play a Part in Your Sexuality
Tag line: Researchers find men with older brother have 38% higher chance of being gay than those without
https://www.newser.com/story/288517/guys-have-an-older-brother-it-may-play-a-part-in-your-sexuality.html
3/24/2020 • 21 minutes, 38 seconds
Michael Smalley Comedy Hour Day 1
Just a little something for my fellow home quarantined friends! Our country and our world need something positive and definitely laughter. My goal is to give you both!
3/23/2020 • 28 minutes, 30 seconds
Karl Vaters - that small church guy
Karl and I met in Guatemala with Compassion International. That's enough said! You don't want to miss this interview.
Karl’s heart is to help pastors of small churches (up to 90 percent of us) find the resources to lead well, and to capitalize on the unique advantages that come with pastoring a small church – something virtually every pastor will spend at least some of their ministry years doing. He also believes that big and small churches can and should work together more often – to the benefit and blessing of everyone.
Karl has been in pastoral ministry for over 30 years. He is the teaching pastor of Cornerstone Christian Fellowship, a healthy small church in Orange County, California, where he has ministered for over 25 years with his wife, Shelley.
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4/3/2019 • 32 minutes, 41 seconds
FLQ - hurling mud and other messy stuff
On today’s Friday Listener Questions day we’ve got a spouse constantly hurling mud, one that wants to talk about the terrifying “do I look good in this dress” question and finally, how long does it take to finally start fighting healthy. It’s going to be a good one today my listening friends!
What do you do when you’ve asked for a timeout, yet your spouse keeps hurling mud and refuses to stop after repeated requests? How do you address the weight of your spouse? How long does it take to transition from bad fighting to healthy fighting?
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3/15/2019 • 24 minutes, 55 seconds
Pursue forgiveness
Today we pursue forgiveness because everybody hurts. If you doubt the power of forgiveness, then we have a story of tragic loss and how forgiveness can set you free from the brokenness of this world and your relationships.
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2/27/2019 • 16 minutes, 18 seconds
The Mental Health Mom
I've got a momma bear in studio today and she goes by the Mental Health Mom! If your child has been diagnosed with a mental disorder then you don't want to miss this episode! Hear her story of misdiagnosis and what she is now doing about it.
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Important links:
Lawlis Peavey PsychoNeuroPlasticity (PNP) Center in Dallas
Sandstone Health in The Woodlands, Texas
Mental Health Mom Resources
2/25/2019 • 44 minutes, 51 seconds
Rebroadcast: God, football and brain dead
“It’s not my life, it’s not the biggest thing in my life. My faith is.” On today’s show we will uncover the truth of who made that quote and why it matters to you at the beginning of 2019. We also share the story of a man who was braindead for 48 hrs and the miracle that happened next.
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2/21/2019 • 20 minutes, 15 seconds
Everything you need to know about foster care
One of the most fascinating interviews of my entire career! The Foster Care and Adoption community needs your help and the Real Life Foster Mom is here to help! Chelsea Zeleny Floro keeps it real and we talk way too much about things that should never be talked about.
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2/20/2019 • 47 minutes, 11 seconds
Rebroadcast: Stress is good
You will want to punch me straight in the neck today because on the show we are going to talk about why stress is actually a good thing! And, I might possibly have one of the greatest Distractions of the Day in the history of mankind. Let’s just say Amy is getting her Christmas present a little early this year!
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2/19/2019 • 22 minutes, 21 seconds
Rebroadcast: Improve your communication now
On today’s show we are giving you 3 things you need to stop immediately in order to improve the communication at home. Well almost three things, because one of them I totally disagree with and will fight to the death with Amy about it!
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2/18/2019 • 32 minutes, 59 seconds
FLQ - Defensiveness, facts and jerks
It’s Friday Listener Questions day! WooHoo! On today’s show, we’ve got defensiveness, staying married to a-holes who will never change, and someone still completely stuck on the importance of facts! Consider it managed!
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2/15/2019 • 45 minutes, 3 seconds
I got a B on Valentine's Day!
Today is a special day for love! And you get to experience my Valentine’s Day gift for Amy live on Facebook and over the podcast. I really hope she likes it!
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2/14/2019 • 23 minutes, 56 seconds
Pursue attraction
A story about a drunken crowd, a demanding husband and a wife who does the only thing she could possibly do to make the situation promising. Today we pursue attraction!
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2/13/2019 • 28 minutes, 33 seconds
Discover the DNA of your relationships
You are made for three fulfilling relationships. You are designed to seek loving, fulfilling and safe relationships with God, others and yourself. Each of these relationships is not only important, but each is intricately related to the other. Everyone wants deep, connected, safe, intimate relationships. A special episode taken from the video series, The DNA of Relationships. Enjoy my father's session!
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2/11/2019 • 46 minutes, 11 seconds
Pursue communication and the Empty Box
Today we have a story. It’s called the Empty Box and we don’t know who wrote it, but trust us, you want to hear it. The emptiness may not be so empty after all.
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2/7/2019 • 20 minutes, 57 seconds
Pursue unity quietly
President Roosevelt's "day in infamy" and Winston Churchill's "never surrender" are two famous speeches setting the tone for today's show. We share a story from our past that I’m simply calling, the great American meltdown of NYC! Today we pursue unity through a story.
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2/6/2019 • 23 minutes, 9 seconds
Pursue peace crazy fast
Today is about understanding, perhaps, the single greatest thing you can do to decrease anger and increase intimacy! Pursue validation.
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2/5/2019 • 25 minutes, 9 seconds
Pursue Healthy Reactions
That was some of the greatest one-liners from movie history edited by Burger Fiction! What does it have to do with today's show on Pursuing Healthy Reactions? Everything! We needed drama to set up understanding the drama in your communication. Today is about finally discovering what's actually wrong with your relationship!
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2/4/2019 • 28 minutes, 38 seconds
FLQ - separate churches and know it all 7yr olds
Could a couple go to separate churches and how do you handle a 7yr old know-it-all boy? All this today on Friday Listener Questions day!
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2/1/2019 • 23 minutes, 47 seconds
Pursue incredible change!
Today is day two of the Pursue Oneness series of podcasts. It’s the first of seven key strategies that will help you build the relationship of your dreams! And you’re going to hate this one! Because it is staring at you every morning in the mirror.
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1/31/2019 • 38 minutes, 11 seconds
Week one of the rest of your life
Believe it or not we’re starting today, I bet you never thought I would do it! Pursue Oneness has begun! Today's topic is about goal setting, infamous issues and so much more! Plus, you get to hear what wicked crazy things we've got for you online!
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1/30/2019 • 21 minutes, 59 seconds
It's huge!
I just want to know if other men have the same confusion and frustration I do about doing our wife's laundry… The amazingly creative cuts and styles and creativity stinks! At one point I believe I had one of her workout tops that was somehow in two totally different pieces but connected and I seriously considered having a lobotomy.
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1/29/2019 • 19 minutes, 57 seconds
Ever feel ripped off?
Amy’s on a prayer retreat and I’m mad as all get out! Of course not about Amy being on a prayer retreat but about the ridiculous NFL football, sabotaging, ripped off, rigged, no good, liver licking...here’s a better rant for how I feel today about the two games over the weekend.
But at the end of the day, this is a relationship show after all. So I thought I might talk about what you can do when you feel ripped off emotionally by someone you love.
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1/28/2019 • 22 minutes, 25 seconds
FLQ - tracking your spouse
Today I take a voicemail question about whether or not it's ok to track your spouse via their smartphone or is that simply a lack of trust. My answer is going to blow your minds! Or possibly not, depends on your mind I guess.
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1/25/2019 • 22 minutes, 15 seconds
Anatomy of trust
Maya Angelou once wrote, “I don't trust people who don't love themselves and tell me, 'I love you.' ... There is an African saying which is: Be careful when a naked person offers you a shirt.” Today we explore the anatomy of trust with Dr. Brené Brown...sort of!
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1/24/2019 • 29 minutes, 21 seconds
Discovering the value of your personality
Here's a special treat! From the video archives here at Smalley Institute, we give you my father's session from Hidden Keys to Loving Lasting Relationships...discovering the value of your personality!
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Free online assessment of the Smalley Animal Personality Test (Lion, Otter, Golden Retriever, Beaver)
Classic video from Dr. Gary Smalley on discovering the value of your personality
In-depth lesson content to help you better understand each other
The personality relationship dynamic report where you can discover key issues for every conceivable personality match
And it's all free!
1/22/2019 • 57 minutes, 37 seconds
The story before 'I have a dream'
That was Martin Luther King Jr and his sermon, “But If Not” given at Ebenezer Baptist Church in Atlanta, Georgia. Today we honor his legacy and find hope deep within the archives of his sermon notes for truth that is just as relevant today as it was when MLK wrote them.
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1/21/2019 • 38 minutes, 7 seconds
FLQ - Abandoned for Europe and a tick story
Today we help a young couple deal with separation and a surprise trip to Europe. Also, a couple who wonders if we might be able to help two completely opposite people get along. Which is something we can’t relate to!
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1/18/2019 • 26 minutes, 31 seconds
Rest Day: time to take care of you
“If you celebrate your differentness, the world will, too. It believes exactly what you tell it—through the words you use to describe yourself, the actions you take to care for yourself, and the choices you make to express yourself. Tell the world you are one-of-a-kind creation who came here to experience wonder and spread joy. Expect to be accommodated.” ― Victoria Moran
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1/17/2019 • 32 minutes, 49 seconds
Strength: a lower body relational workout
“That which does not kill us makes us stronger.” Friedrich Nietzsche. You’ll never guess what today’s show is about! We’ve got a lot more quotes like those for you today and they all have to do with the third New Year workout for your relationship...strength and speed. You get a great lower body workout today!
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1/16/2019 • 34 minutes, 32 seconds
Mindset: the ultimate upper body workout for love
Mahatma Gandhi once said, “I will not let anyone walk through my mind with their dirty feet.”
Your mindset needs a workout big time. Because you allow a lot of “dirty feet” walk around up there and it’s gotten messy! Today you’re getting the three keys to the greatest upper body workout for your relationship mindset ever!
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1/15/2019 • 28 minutes, 8 seconds
The core of communication
It’s all about your core, the title for the first show in our “Get Your Relationship Back in Shape” series to kick off 2019. This special New Year’s program will go four days and each episode will be a simple exercise you can start immediately to get your relationship “six-pack” real nice! The word of the day is “hark”. There will also be a brand new online experience to go along with this special series!
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1/14/2019 • 30 minutes, 28 seconds
FLQ - Failed nudity and trust
It’s Friday Listener Question day! On today’s show Amy and I get confronted through the voicemail hotline about our views of nudity then Kirsten left a message on wanting to help a friend, who has a history of being hurt, find trust again.
Get all the show notes and more free stuff here: https://www.smalleyinstitute.com/blog/flq-failed-nudity-and-trust
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1/11/2019 • 37 minutes, 53 seconds
If every couple could have a marriage like Jeff and MacKenzie Bezos
Jeff and MacKenzie Bezos shared on Twitter today that they are ending their 25 yr marriage. But they sound so happy! What in the world is going on? We investigated it for you and have some answers. But today’s show is about why your marriage should be like the marriage Jeff and MacKenzie Bezos described in their divorce announcement! There are literally 8 things stated in the tweet that every couple would dream of experiencing in their marriage.
Get all the show notes and more free stuff here: https://www.smalleyinstitute.com/blog/if-every-couple-could-have-a-marriage-like-jeff-and-mackenzie-bezos
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1/10/2019 • 33 minutes, 45 seconds
God, football and brain dead
“It’s not my life, it’s not the biggest thing in my life. My faith is.” On today’s show we will uncover the truth of who made that quote and why it matters to you at the beginning of 2019. We also share the story of a man who was braindead for 48 hrs and the miracle that happened next.
Get all the show notes and more free stuff here: https://www.smalleyinstitute.com/blog/god-football-and-brain-dead
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1/9/2019 • 20 minutes, 15 seconds
How Nick Saban's loss helped my relationship
The biggest college football game of the year was last night and Nick Saban's unbeatable Alabama football team got crushed. I was thrilled! But then I watched the post-game press conference and changed my mind because both Nick Saban and quarterback Tua Tagovailoa taught me how to better handle losses in my relationships.
Get all the show notes and more free stuff here: https://www.smalleyinstitute.com/blog/how-nick-saban-s-loss-helped-my-relationship
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1/8/2019 • 30 minutes, 33 seconds
Write a letter change your life
Author Melody Beattie wrote, “Gratitude unlocks the fullness of life. It turns what we have into enough, and more. It turns denial into acceptance, chaos to order, confusion to clarity. It can turn a meal into a feast, a house into a home, a stranger into a friend.” Today we learn the power of gratitude from writing a letter to people you care about.
Get all the show notes and more free stuff here: https://www.smalleyinstitute.com/blog/write-a-letter-change-your-life
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1/7/2019 • 23 minutes, 43 seconds
FLQ - Overcoming the impossible
It’s Friday Listener Questions day! Today I get to brag about my athletic prowess (sort of), help Matt deal with a wife who kicked him out wanting him to get his life right with Jesus, infidelity accusations from a hurt spouse with past issues and a very funny but hurtful listener shares why they like our show.
Get all the show notes and more free stuff here: https://www.smalleyinstitute.com/blog/flq-overcoming-the-impossible
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1/4/2019 • 37 minutes, 53 seconds
Baby has bounce back
Disappointment, failure, defeat, and heartbreak happen. So what the heck do people have who consistently get back up again and find new ways to be satisfied in life? That thing is one word, and it is... resilience. Today you’re going to discover how to add a little resilience to your life at the beginning of 2019.
Get all the show notes and more free stuff here: https://www.smalleyinstitute.com/blog/baby-has-bounce-back
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1/3/2019 • 23 minutes, 25 seconds
The nightmare of labelling
On today’s show, “The road to hell is paved with overly simplistic labels.” Wrote author Grant Hilary Brenner. There are three different labels we either stick on ourselves or the people we love that need to be eliminated and thrown away immediately! We reveal the labels and how to get rid of them today on Smalley Marriage Radio.
Get all the show notes and more free stuff here: https://www.smalleyinstitute.com/blog/the-nightmare-of-labelling
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1/2/2019 • 39 minutes, 43 seconds
Christmas Eve alone - a story
You can change someone's life in the easiest and most fun ways you could ever imagine. The question today is if you are willing to do it. Here is a story written by Niki Flow but read by Michael Smalley.
Get the full notes for this episode here: https://www.smalleyinstitute.com/blog/christmas-even-alone
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12/25/2018 • 23 minutes, 23 seconds
FLQ - Bad Christians and hopeful husbands
It’s Friday Listener Questions day! On today’s show we help answer stuff about bad Christians, a couple struggling and a husband wanting the impossible.
For the full notes and more of this episode: https://www.smalleyinstitute.com/blog/flq-bad-christians-and-hopeful-husbands
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12/21/2018 • 30 minutes, 57 seconds
You don't have to
December 21 and 22 are the worst travel days of the entire year. We know some of you are going home to families that aren't perfect. Today is a day for hope, because we are are going to journey with you and give some simple tips for dealing with hurtful, broken family relationships.
Get the full notes for this episode: https://www.smalleyinstitute.com/blog/you-don-t-have-to
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12/20/2018 • 33 minutes, 13 seconds
Stress is good
You will want to punch me straight in the neck today because on the show we are going to talk about why stress is actually a good thing! And, I might possibly have one of the greatest Distractions of the Day in the history of mankind. Let’s just say Amy is getting her Christmas present a little early this year! Welcome to SMR.
FOR FULL SHOW NOTES: https://www.smalleyinstitute.com/blog/stress-is-good
Transform Your Marriage in 31 Days for only $31 dollars! We took the guesswork out of "what can help" and created for you an experience where we "drip" our most important education, devotions, and date night inspiration to you each week.
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12/19/2018 • 22 minutes, 21 seconds
Defining success for real
Twitter is flooded from a now famous tweet by JK Rowling on what successful people do. Her response got us thinking, what do successful people do? And what we found on the internet did not make us happy. So we are defining success for you today and the two things you can do to be a success.
FOR THE FULL NOTES OF THIS SHOW: https://www.smalleyinstitute.com/blog/defining-success-for-real
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12/18/2018 • 24 minutes, 41 seconds
Improve your communication now
On today’s show we are giving you 3 things you need to stop immediately in order to improve the communication at home. Well almost three things, because one of them I totally disagree with and will fight to the death with Amy about it!
Transform Your Marriage in 31 Days for only $31 dollars! We took the guesswork out of "what can help" and created for you an experience where we "drip" our most important education, devotions, and date night inspiration to you each week.
https://www.smalleyinstitute.com/p/transform-your-marriage-in-31-days
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12/17/2018 • 32 minutes, 59 seconds
FLQ - Breaking the teenager
How do you break a teenager from entitlement? This Friday Listener Question has a teenage daughter who thinks she’s entitled for everything. "We are going crazy." Amy and I want to help this listener and you feel less crazy about dealing with teenage entitlement.
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12/14/2018 • 20 minutes, 25 seconds
The deception connection - Intimacy Intelligence
Today's show gets right to the point! One of our Facebook friends made a brilliant comment about the grey area of private thoughts verses secret thoughts. She helped us clarify something important that we share with you today.
Transform Your Marriage in 31 Days for only $31 dollars! We took the guesswork out of "what can help" and created for you an experience where we "drip" our most important education, devotions, and date night inspiration to you each week.
https://www.smalleyinstitute.com/p/transform-your-marriage-in-31-days
BOOK US FOR A COMEDY NIGHT OR RELATIONSHIP EVENT
https://www.smalleyinstitute.com/p/comedy-of-love
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12/13/2018 • 12 minutes, 31 seconds
The affection connection - Intimacy Intelligence
Today we are talking about the sound of intimacy and what you can do to make intimacy sound beautiful! And it’s not dirty. The Distraction of the Day: So now that I know how much cockroaches freak you out. I’m going to fly through this show just to get to this distraction of the day! Yea, it has cockroaches!
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12/11/2018 • 31 minutes, 20 seconds
Should you lie - Intimacy Intelligence
It’s going to be a week for intimacy! Four shows all under the heading of, Intimacy Intelligence. On today’s show, do you really have to be totally honest with your spouse?
Distraction of the Day:
Amy...the following three things are possible reasons why a Nebraska Principal is now on administrative leave, can you guess which one it is?
She banned candy
She was caught eating cockroaches
She hosted a kegger for 10th grade class during school hours
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12/10/2018 • 41 minutes, 9 seconds
FLQ - Answers to questions you want to hear
Today we answer your questions, and they are incredible questions! But perhaps the thing you need to know most, is that I messed with Amy in the craziest way today...and she loved it!
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12/8/2018 • 37 minutes, 47 seconds
Serenity from solitude
“A life without a lonely place, that is, a life without a quiet center, easily becomes destructive. When we cling to the results of our actions as our only way of self-identification, then we become possessive and defensive and tend to look at our fellow human beings more as enemies to be kept at a distance than as friends with whom we share the gifts of life.” That was a quote from Henri Nouwen and his masterpiece Out of Solitude. Today we reflect on the benefits of being alone. The Distraction of the Day: How nasty would a song have to be to be removed from the playlists of major radio networks in Canada for being offensive? It’s a Christmas song. Find out which one at the end of today’s show and the lyrics that got banned.
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12/6/2018 • 20 minutes, 10 seconds
The art of freedom from hurt
Have you ever gotten your feelings hurt by someone’s words or actions? Of course you have! Which is why today is so important for you. Whenever you experience things like Character assassinations, Threats of abandonment, Threats of exile, Invalidations, and Preaching...there’s actually something you can do in the moment to help you not take it so personally. That’s what we’ve got going on today for you on SMR. Distraction of the Day: What’s the most obnoxious thing a mother-in-law could do regarding hosting a family Christmas meal? I honestly don’t know what your reaction will be to this one, which honestly makes me feel very nervous =] because it feels like I should know what your thoughts would be on this one, if I was a better husband.
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12/4/2018 • 34 minutes, 4 seconds
To the unloved daughters
“I was the difficult daughter, deemed theatrical and way too sensitive, according to my mother. I was mocked for my reactions, for my emotionality, for how I laughed and how I cried, and I believed all those things to be true about me.” That was a quote from Gerri, a 43 yr old daughter. Today we are exposing the lies for the unloved daughters and more importantly, revealing the truth that will set them free! Distraction of the Day: Remember that last distraction of the day where Canadian forces disbanded raccoon fighting rings? Well I’m not sure what’s going on in the world today, but China has an even weirder crime ring! Dare to take a guess?
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12/3/2018 • 34 minutes, 1 second
FLQ - Dealing with separation and mental disorders
Today we take two of your questions, the first one is a voicemail hotline question from Matt who wants to know how to talk about his current separation and trying to get a plan together with this estranged wife. The second question came through our website and this wife wants to know how to deal with a spouse who has a serious mental disorder like Bipolar with sociopathic tendencies.
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11/30/2018 • 32 minutes, 5 seconds
Purpose driven joy - Relentless Joy #4
“He who has a why to live for can bear almost any how.” ― Friedrich Nietzsche. There comes a time in every person’s life when you need to make a choice, a decision. Today is that day for you! When you live with purpose, you get to experience genuine joy. Distraction of the Day: You know all those crazy gender reveal parties and stunts parents are doing these days? What if I told you one dad spent over $200,000 on his baby’s gender reveal? Any guesses as to what could cost $200,000?
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11/29/2018 • 21 minutes, 31 seconds
The joy in caring for yourself - Relentless Joy #4
Jean Shinoda Bolen once said, “When you recover or discover something that nourishes your soul and brings joy, care enough about yourself to make room for it in your life.” Today we continue our series on Relentless Joy and talk about the joy in caring for yourself. Distraction of the Day, What’s the weirdest crime ring ever busted?
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11/28/2018 • 32 minutes, 41 seconds
3 ways to live filled with joy - Relentless Joy #2
"We can only be said to be alive in those moments when our hearts are conscious of our treasures." - Thornton Wilder. Today in our series on Relentless Joy, we talk about three things you can do to live a life filled with joy through the daily choice of gratitude.
Distraction of the Day:
Do you ever get anxious about hosting a big party at our house? A big survey was done recently about the top 10 ways to make your home guest ready. If you can guess the first one, me and the kids will do all the cleaning for our next party while you sit back and relaxing.
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11/27/2018 • 29 minutes, 59 seconds
Relentless joy - the first step
In a Charlie Brown Christmas, Charlie Brown was having trouble getting into the Christmas spirit so Linus said, “Charlie Brown, you’re the only person I know who can take a wonderful season like Christmas and turn it into a problem.” Today we start a five day journey on how to experience relentless joy. And you’re not going to like step one. For the distraction of the day, can a guy with a $65 budget get you to cry with his short film about Christmas?
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11/26/2018 • 28 minutes, 5 seconds
Husbands with low sex drive - Friday Listener Day
It’s Friday, which means we get to handle one of your questions! Today is a rarely talked about issue that researchers say impact an estimated 20% of couples. Esther from California asked us to do a show about low sex drive, but she wants to know about the husbands who struggle with a low desire for sex. We learn why this might be happening and more importantly, what to do about it. For the Distraction of the Day: Which two groups of people would be the most unlikely groups to serve soup together for the homeless?
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11/23/2018 • 26 minutes, 15 seconds
Be awakened
Happy Thanksgiving everyone! If you feel like your relationship is on autopilot, we talk about three things you can do in order to experience a fully alive, present and authentic relationship where kindness, forgiveness and patience rule!
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11/22/2018 • 26 minutes, 37 seconds
Stop being a doormat
Today's show is about how to stop being a doormat but not becoming a bulldozer instead. And then there's this poem I wrote with Reagan...
Twas the day before Thanksgiving, and all through the land
People were scurrying - things got out of hand
The grocery store workers knew not what to do
When the customer told them to hurry because he had to poo
That customer was me, yes this is true
For the day before Thanksgiving HEB almost got a gift they could not return
Distraction of the Day:
If you get arrested for invading a home, assaulting the homeowner and doing this all naked...how should you try and make this right with your neighbor?
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11/21/2018 • 28 minutes, 37 seconds
Guaranteed happiness awaits
You know when God does something so unexpected in your life, you can’t help but fall down flat on your face thankful and overwhelmed by how much God loves you? That happened to me on Sunday and it involved an addiction, the death of my father and a jacket.
Coming up on today’s show:
Miracles
Power
And total fulfillment in your life no matter what is going on around you
And...Twitter has once again reached out into the ethos to discover the answer to: What did you have 20 years ago that you don’t have today? Insanity ensues.
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11/20/2018 • 45 minutes, 31 seconds
14 important facts about hugs
Today we’ve got 14 interesting facts about hugs and why they matter so much to every single important relationship in your life.
Distraction of the Day:
I’m actually a little nervous for the distraction of the day. But at the end of this show I’m going to show Amy a personally selected, tirelessly researched, conglomeration of horribly awkward hugs...and my winning picture of the most awkward hug could get me in trouble. So I went ahead and found a video that will make everything ok again.
11/19/2018 • 36 minutes, 47 seconds
The teenage rebellion cure - Friday listener questions
Today we are going to talk about 6 things to help you cure teenager rebelliousness...
Distraction of the Day:
There was a worldwide competition held in Lithuania recently, it was for women, can you guess what it was about and I’ll even give you the grand prize for winning the World’s...a trip to Parliament in Strasburg or Brussels.
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11/17/2018 • 45 minutes, 28 seconds
The greatest present of all time
Amy: Hello listeners! This is Amy Smalley reminding you this holiday season that sometimes the very best present you can give your family is…...being….present.
Michael: Oh Amy….
Amy: What? You don’t get it? It’s present like a gift but also like you know the present….
Michael: Oh no I get it, listeners I’m so sorry I think that may be the last time I let Amy open the show.
Amy: Hey, everybody loves puns they’re so, punny.
Michael: oh no.
Amy: You should probably put me in a punitentiary
Michael: Listeners I’m so sorry I promise today’s episode will not in fact be about puns. We are going to talk about how you need to make sure you remain present this holiday season so you don’t miss out on all the wonderful memories happening all around you.
Amy: So to find out about how to wrap up this present of presence, stay tuned!
Distraction of the Day:
I’m pretty excited about driverless cars but I just learned something from a legitimate scientific study that shows why driverless cars will be the greatest invention of our time! Amy, can you guess what would get me overly excited?
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11/15/2018 • 30 minutes, 51 seconds
How NOT to go broke this holiday
Tis the season to spend money fa la la la la la la la going shopping and overspending fa la la la la la la la la don we now our credit card debt fa la la la la la la la la How could you spend that I’m going to kill you! Fa la la la la, la la la la
Some of you will find yourselves playing this song during the holiday season but hopefully by the end of this episode you’ll be singing a different tune.
And for the Distraction of the Day, Chicago Bears kicker missed field goals because of Jesus. Amy will have a message when she hears this one that you won't want to miss!
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11/14/2018 • 32 minutes, 40 seconds
Calm down holiday drama in 3 minutes or less
In this corner, we have Uncle Joey who’s had too much to drink and some strong opinions about the recent elections. Annnnnnnd in this corner we have our challenger Aunt Marge who feels the need to correct people about practically everything and is just itching for an opportunity to disagree. In this epic clash of opinions who will win in this holiday Battle Royale?
Amy: Um, I don’t really think anyone wins?
Michael: *sarcastic* But there’s always a winner!
Amy: No, I don’t think so. Really in these family battles no one wins and everyone just feels kinda awkward.
Michael: So what you’re saying is engaging in family drama doesn't actually fix anything and just creates more tension? Huh, who knew?
Amy: So today we are going see how engaging in family drama isn't really helpful and how we, as Christ followers, should be seeking to de-escalate conflict instead of provoke it.
Michael: And we’re going to teach you a method that can de-escalate this conflict in just three minutes.
For the Distraction of the Day, I’ve got a special video for Amy today. It’s only a one minute commercial for Spotify, the music streaming service. There’s no way their commercial could cause Amy to be afraid...is there? Stay tuned till the end of this podcast to find out whether or not I can succeed in terrifying Amy with a Spotify commercial.
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11/13/2018 • 21 minutes, 55 seconds
Thrive the drive - Happy Holiday Families #1
Folks it’s the holiday season and while our children are getting more and more excited about Christmas and toys parents are already starting to dread the 10 hour drive across country that the in-laws finally guilted them into making this year. If you find yourself stressed about traveling with your crazy family this year then stay tuned for some helpful tips on how to wrangle all those strong personalities into one unified goal.
What in the world did a superintendent of a school district do to get fired behind the bleachers at school? Find out at the end of today’s show.
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11/12/2018 • 43 minutes, 51 seconds
We wish everyone was like this guy
We have a great question from one of you today! It’s a newly married listener, but this guy is already on track to being an amazing husband unless he ignores my advice today. I’ve got something for those of you who are strong at heart and have a steal stomach. Let’s just say you’ll never want to eat sushi again!
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11/11/2018 • 23 minutes, 13 seconds
Your worst enemy
Were you aware that you could be your own worst enemy? Today we are going to help you eliminate the negative self talk that is destroying everything that matters to you. For the distraction of the day: What’s the weirdest thing you could imagine happening at a Waffle House? I think we may have found it but you’ll have to listen to the very end to discover what it was.
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11/8/2018 • 37 minutes, 31 seconds
The greatest political show ever
“Nothing in life is to be feared, it is only to be understood. Now is the time to understand more, so that we may fear less.” -- Marie Curie
Words cause fear. "socialistic," "neo-fascist," "immigrant invasion," "racist." The votes are in and this is going to be the first ever politically motivated podcast of my life...and I’m still not going to get into politics. Today we are going to explore how seeking understanding can actually help eliminate fear.
Amy..are you willing to earn $100 an hour at a job? I need you to accept or reject this job before you even hear about it. Do you want the job? Now stay tuned till the end of this podcast to hear if Amy made a wise choice or turned down something spectacular.
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11/7/2018 • 37 minutes, 39 seconds
Why you don't quit with Sam Lamott
You have chosen an excellent day to listen in because today, I have the honor of interviewing Sam Lamott, creator and host of the How to Human podcast which if you like listening to him today you can subscribe for free to his podcast on iTunes.
But we’re going to give you something else for free today, something Sam likes to call, “a Mood Altering Substance”. To find out what this substance is and how you can get it, keep listening.
Can I be honest and authentic with you? In a million years I never thought I'd get Sam Lamott to be on the show. That’s why I had my assistant reach out to him so I didn’t have to feel the sting of failure and rejection!
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11/6/2018 • 1 hour, 10 minutes, 19 seconds
You need a sexual ethic - interview with theology guru Preston Sprinkle
"It's the sin we don't struggle with that we tend to vilify most." That's just one of the great lines from Preston Sprinkle and my latest interview. Preston and I get into the topic of how to love someone well you don't agree with and what does it look like from a biblical perspective. You don't want to miss this episode because every one of us has someone in our life we could love better. Of course, I end up oversharing about my own issues, thankfully Preston is a kind man!
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11/5/2018 • 45 minutes, 10 seconds
Did I do something wrong?
Today we are taking a question that was asked of me by one of you: the question is “What if your spouse doesn’t respond when you ask what is wrong?” Well, to get the answer to that question you’ll just have to keep listening!
And for the distraction of the day. Something insane happened recently to a baggage handler for one of the major airlines. I’m giving Amy a multiple choice test you’ll wanna hear.
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11/2/2018 • 23 minutes, 21 seconds
Why women struggle with sex
Well, "cough" today uh, hello podcast listeners. Today we’re gonna talk about something, you know, we’re gonna talk about uhhhhhhh... Amy Smalley interrupts, “We’re gonna talk about why women struggle with sex.”
Yup. That’s what we’re doing, so ya.
And then for the distraction of the day, there’s something you can do with cows but it costs $300 an hour. You’ll find out at the end if Amy is open to it.
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11/1/2018 • 24 minutes, 45 seconds
Authentic love
In 1994, the year we got married, two Americans were invited by the Russian Department of Education to come and teach morals and ethics in the public schools. They were even allowed to teach biblical stories and principles. When they shared the Christmas story at an orphanage of about 100 boys and girls who’d been abandoned, abused and left in the care of the government...one little boy named Misha changed the story of Jesus’ birth in a way you won’t believe! In fact, it’s the inspiration for today’s five ways you can become someone’s favorite person!
Near the end of this podcast, I’ve got yet another ridiculous story for you. This one is about chickens. All I can say is, come on people!
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10/31/2018 • 41 minutes, 5 seconds
Top 5 Fantasies
Are you the kind of person who likes to let their imagination run a little wild? Are you afraid that maybe your imagination has a tendency to run a little too wild? Kids, if you’re listening you may want to close your ears and parents, you’ll want to open yours because in today’s episode we’re gonna dispel some common misconceptions about the, shall we say, r-rated day dreams of the average adult. Again, kids your gonna want to take your imaginations into the other room because now, it’s time for the adults to have some fun.
Then, near the end of our show today, I’ve got potentially the creepiest Distraction of the Day ever! This is October after all and Halloween is tomorrow!
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10/30/2018 • 39 minutes, 57 seconds
3 Tips to build a better relationship this month
We have now reached the last week of October and maybe you're already feeling stressed about the upcoming holiday season. Well, to help you prepare I’ve got a few tips on how you can take the time to improve your relationship in November.
And then, for the Distraction of the Day, which is near the end of each episode, I’ve got a story, from football, that’s going to make Amy cry. I saw this video over the weekend and it was filmed right after a major victory for a major school from a major Heisman candidate and it had nothing to do with football.
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10/29/2018 • 31 minutes, 1 second
Do you ever feel controlled?
“You just don’t understand why I’m right.” “I wish you would try to see this from my perspective.” “Why cant you let me have this one?” If you have ever found yourself thinking or saying any of these phrases, you may want to stay tuned.
Then, at the end of today’s show bc I’m in California I’m going to share something with you that may make you never want to visit Disney ever ever ever again.
10/27/2018 • 26 minutes, 11 seconds
Be irresistible
A recent study has revealed that people who are more socially connected generally lead healthier lives than those who are more isolated. This is all well and good, but the question we are going to raise today is, how do we become someone others want to get to know? Stay tuned to find out how. If you want to be the kind of person other people are attracted to, then you need to become that person for someone else. The trap we tend to fall into is we tend to isolate and close ourselves off out of a fear of being rejected. Instead of becoming more and more isolated, make the extra effort to be the person you wish others were for you. Be thankful, kind, loving and serving to others and I promise, you will immediately see a difference in all your relationships.
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10/25/2018 • 30 minutes, 1 second
The ultimate flu vaccine
On today’s show we discuss one method that may cause you to look at the people you live with a little differently. It’s that time of the year pod cast listeners; cold and flue season is back with a vengeance and many are trying anything and everything to ease their aches and pains. From essential oils to detox diets, people are trying some crazy things to quickly rid themselves of their symptoms. On today’s show, we will discuss one method that may cause you to look at the people you live with a little differently.
And lastly, at the end of the show for our Totally Unrelated Distraction of the Day, two people break into a home in Canada. I’m going to give Amy the rest of this story at the end of the show today and I’m betting that she will totally support this home invasion…Canadian style.
10/24/2018 • 41 minutes, 59 seconds
The Anatomy of Marriage Interview
Today is a special day because I got to interview Seth and Melanie Studley! They have the Anatomy of Marriage Podcast that is a huge success! They share things you just don't normally hear from a couple, especially where one of them is a licensed marriage and family therapist! Don't miss out on this episode. It's a new take on couples therapy and relationship advice. “This is the podcast that we wish we could have had 9 years ago when our marriage was falling apart!” Seth & Melanie Studley
10/23/2018 • 52 minutes, 17 seconds
The dark secret of social media
Let’s talk about the social behind social media, what you think you know may surprise you, and what you don’t...well that’s what we’re gonna talk about today. Along with a new segment we are calling “A Completely Unrelated Distraction of the Day” where I will share with you fun, strange, inspirational and often times totally unbelievable news from around the world. Wait till you hear what a pizza delivery guy did for someone in hospice. Amy Morin, PsychologyToday.com wrote, "Throughout the last couple of decades, our ability to connect with people around the globe has exploded. Initially, the internet allowed us to chat, join newsgroups, or email anyone in the world. The invention of cellphones allowed us to talk to people when we were away from our desks and outside of our homes. Then, social networks allowed us to connect with our neighbors, childhood pals, college buddies, and co—workers with a click of a button. Finally, smartphones made it easier than ever to connect with anyone we wanted around the clock. So you'd think we'd be feeling good about our social lives, right? After all, never in the history of the universe has communicating with people been so simple and accessible."
10/22/2018 • 24 minutes, 25 seconds
To be or not to be - statement #28 from Jesus
Serving others is the greatest tool for influencing them and setting them up to change for the better. There is no greater act of love than to serve and what we’ve learned throughout this 28 day journey is that love transforms. So what kind of servant should you be? "We weren’t created to be warm, safe, and comfortable. You and I were made to be 'turned on'—to put our love to work, to apply our patience in difficult, trying situations..." (Ted Engstrom)
10/15/2018 • 29 minutes, 36 seconds
Don’t bring a water pistol to a fire fight - statement #27 from Jesus
The benefits of being a disciple and discipleship are overwhelming! Joy, peace and happiness result from following Jesus Christ, together with the hope of being like him and with him in heaven. “Therefore, go and make disciples of all the nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and the Son and the Holy Spirit. 20 Teach these new disciples to obey all the commands I have given you. And be sure of this: I am with you always, even to the end of the age.” Matthew 28:19-20 The heart of Jesus is that his disciples go out to all the world and make more disciples.
10/14/2018 • 14 minutes, 21 seconds
Reconcile through faith or be eaten by the hawk - statement #26 from Jesus
"So if you are presenting a sacrifice at the altar in the Temple and you suddenly remember that someone has something against you, leave your sacrifice there at the altar. Go and be reconciled to that person. Then come and offer your sacrifice to God." Matthew 5:23-24 NLT In v23 Jesus is likely talking about someone you have legitimately offended. You probably did do something wrong and you need to go immediately and make it right. Jesus says there’s more to this commandment than simply not murdering. We must tackle our anger by forgiving each other. Even if we are at the most sacred moment of our year—poised to offer a gift to God—forgiveness is more important. We must leave our gift and make peace with the person with whom we are so angry. (Knowles, Andrew. The Bible Guide.)
10/13/2018 • 14 minutes, 17 seconds
Be radical when it hurts - statement #25 from Jesus
Jesus is demanding a radical kind of love, to forgive when they don’t deserve it. Peter’s question in v21 comes from the teaching in verses 15-20. One of the new things I learned here was that the typical rabbinic consensus was that you would need to forgive a brother three times. But Jesus radically challenges this idea. Not three but seven times seventy! "Jesus does more than forbid vengeance; he transposes a cry of revenge (see Gen. 4:15, 23–24) into a call for forgiveness. Whether he says “seventy-seven times” (NIV) or “seventy times seven” (NIV marg.), his words reject a calculating, quantitative approach to forgiveness. Love within the church “is expressed by an indefatigable capacity to forgive the brethren.”25 The ensuing parable illustrates the lesson." (Chamblin, J. Knox. “Matthew.” Evangelical Commentary on the Bible.)
10/12/2018 • 14 minutes, 17 seconds
Life is short - statement #24 from Jesus
"The picture of forgiveness in verse 38 is of a measuring jar in which the corn is pressed down so that it will hold more, shaken together so that every crack is filled, and poured over the top so that it overflows. Just as God has generously given to his own, so the disciple should give an overflowing amount to others." “Do not judge others, and you will not be judged. Do not condemn others, or it will all come back against you. Forgive others, and you will be forgiven.” Luke 6:37
10/11/2018 • 14 minutes, 1 second
Be the greatest of all time - statement #23 from Jesus
Imagine going to the doctor's office for a check-up. The doctor says to you, "You are a magnificent physical specimen. You have the body of an Olympian. You are to be congratulated." Later that day while climbing the stairs, your heart gives out. You find out later your arteries were so clogged that you were like one jelly doughnut away from the grim reaper. You go back to the doctor and say, "Why didn't you tell me?" The doctor says, "Well, I knew your body is in worse shape than the Pillsbury doughboy, but if I tell people stuff like that, they get kind of offended. It's kind of bad for business. They don't come back. I want this to be a safe place where you feel loved and accepted." You'd be furious! You'd say to the doctor, "When it comes to my body, I want the truth!" (Illustration by John Ortberg)
10/10/2018 • 17 minutes, 40 seconds
Claim your birthright now - statement #22 from Jesus
Then Jesus said, “Come to me, all of you who are weary and carry heavy burdens, and I will give you rest. Matthew 11:28 (NLT). Peace is the birthright of every believer in all circumstances. It is found only in God and is maintained through having a close relationship with him. The point here is to find peace, rest in Jesus before ever trying to obey his commands. Otherwise law keeping becomes a terrible bondage. Many whom Jesus addresses are weary and burdened precisely because of their efforts to keep the Law (cf. Acts 15:10). Jesus grants rest to his people by giving them his law (vv. 28–29)! In fact, the subject of the very next passage is that God revealed the fourth commandment to grant rest (the meaning of the word sabbath). Jesus’ yoke is easy!
10/9/2018 • 18 minutes, 53 seconds
Protection from the nasty stuff - statement #21 from Jesus
Carl Lundquist in Silent Issues of the Church, writes: Henry Wingblade used to say that Christian personality is hidden deep inside us. It is unseen, like the soup carried in a tureen high over a waiter’s head. No one knows what’s inside—unless the waiter is bumped and he trips! Just so, people don’t know what’s inside us until we’ve been bumped. But if Christ is living inside, what spills out is the fruit of the Spirit. "Those who are dominated by the sinful nature think about sinful things, but those who are controlled by the Holy Spirit think about things that please the Spirit. So letting your sinful nature control your mind leads to death. But letting the Spirit control your mind leads to life and peace." Romans 8:5–6 NLT
10/8/2018 • 13 minutes, 43 seconds
Wish you had a damper - statement #20 from Jesus
Anyone who has lived or worked in a skyscraper knows tall buildings sway in the wind. There’s no danger; the engineers know it will happen, but the sway is uncomfortable for people inside. When engineers and architects designed Citicorp Center in New York, they decided to do something about it. At the top of the fifty-nine story building, they installed a machine called a tuned mass damper. The machine, writes Joe Morgenstern in New Yorker magazine, “was essentially a four-hundred-and-ten-ton block of concrete, attached to huge springs and floating on a film of oil. When the building swayed, the block’s inertia worked to damp the movement and calm tenants’ queasy stomachs.” When the winds of life gust around us, there is a stabilizing force in the heart of every believer that calms his or her fears. It is trust in God. “Don’t let your hearts be troubled. Trust in God, and trust also in me.” John 14:1
10/8/2018 • 9 minutes, 20 seconds
The remedy for fear - statement #19 from Jesus
Some of you are not going to like this one because it’s something you struggle with everyday. Personally this is finally something I don’t really struggle through a lot. I think my blessing is that I’ve gone through so many insane things that it has made it easier for me not to freak out about the future. However, let’s not bring up: self-discipline, thoughts, lying and a whole bunch more! The point is take a deep breath and trust Him. All of us are in the same boat dealing with the waves of this fallen world. But if worrying about the future is your thing, the truth is that uneasiness and anxiety about the future is a faith problem and grounded in a lack of trust in God and what he has promised.
10/6/2018 • 12 minutes, 52 seconds
Scrambled eggs and great relationships - statement #18 from Jesus
The difficulties and struggles of your relationship are going to tempt you to give up. The evil one is going to flood your mind with thoughts like, “Does God even love me? This is never going to get better. I can’t keep doing this!” Never stop praying. Never stop believing. Never stop hoping in Jesus. Dear brothers and sisters, when troubles of any kind come your way, consider it an opportunity for great joy. 3 For you know that when your faith is tested, your endurance has a chance to grow. 4 So let it grow, for when your endurance is fully developed, you will be perfect and complete, needing nothing. James 1:2-3
10/5/2018 • 11 minutes, 57 seconds
Allow the hurt to grow you - statement #17 from Jesus
For me this statement, isn’t just about prayer. Even though yesterday we talked about how important prayer is and how it should be the beginning, middle and end of everything we do. Jesus suffered. If you keep reading in Matthew 26:36 you can see how his best friends in life let him down. They just couldn’t stay awake. Jesus Christ’s life was characterised by suffering. There are two things you need to learn today, two things that can free you from suffering.
10/4/2018 • 12 minutes, 54 seconds
Is it really the only thing left - statement #16 from Jesus
"That does not mean that one needs to be persistent because God is reluctant to give. The point of the parable is not that God, like the person in the house, must be persuaded to give. Just the opposite. One needs to be persistent because God longs to give good gifts to his children, and he is sure to answer." (Schreiner, T. R.)
“And so I tell you, keep on asking, and you will receive what you ask for. Keep on seeking, and you will find. Keep on knocking, and the door will be opened to you.” Luke 11:9
A Beautiful Garden of Prayer by James Henry Fillmore and Eleanor Allen Schroll in 1920:
There’s a garden where Jesus is waiting,
There’s a place that is wondrously fair.
For it glows with the light of His presence,
‘Tis the beautiful garden of prayer.
In my own life, and what I’ve often heard from others, “I’ve got nothing left but to pray...”.
When are we going to stop treating prayer as a “last resort”? It should be the primary way we work on change for ourselves and others.
10/3/2018 • 12 minutes, 8 seconds
Get everything you ever wanted - statement #15 from Jesus
“But I say, do not resist an evil person! If someone slaps you on the right cheek, offer the other cheek also.” Matthew 5:39
Obeying the commands is a heart issue.
If you don’t make it a heart issue, you’ll do your best to find a way around the commands of Jesus.
We can’t ignore these demands by Jesus. Obedience is the fruit of loving Jesus.
How does Jesus want you to love others?
?We are no longer under the rule of reciprocity! This is about freedom from hurt and unmet expectations. You actually don’t have to hit back, you can walk in freedom because of what Jesus did for you.
In Jesus you are:
Defended
Restored
Healed
Set free
Redeemed
Cared for
You are loved!
You are accepted!
You matter!
And now go and give what you have received to others!
10/2/2018 • 11 minutes, 9 seconds
You know what you want soooo - statement #14 from Jesus
“Do to others whatever you would like them to do to you. This is the essence of all that is taught in the law and the prophets.” Matthew 7:12
In chapter 7:1-12 Jesus is addressing your attitude toward others and God, specifically being judgmental.
There’s two types of judging:
Hypocritica
Healthy
Once you get your own junk, how you approach others about theirs will be different, more compassionate and understanding.
You know that God is the actual judge and you are merely trying to help out a fellow disciple of Jesus.
How does Jesus want you to love others?
Positive acts of love defeat a judgmental spirit.
This one statement is a grand summary of all that Jesus taught about relationships with others.
He wants you to be
Compassionate
Forgiving
Understanding
Empathic
Frankly! All the things you are wanting from others!
It’s really about turning your complaints about other people and how they are treating you into acts of love for them.
How is this possible? Trusting in Jesus that he will empower you to pull it off. Think of it as a miracle, because it is.
10/1/2018 • 12 minutes, 40 seconds
You need this the most - statement #13 from Jesus
Then Jesus answered his thoughts. “Simon,” he said to the Pharisee, “I have something to say to you.” “Go ahead, Teacher,” Simon replied. Then Jesus told him this story: “A man loaned money to two people—500 pieces of silver to one and 50 pieces to the other. But neither of them could repay him, so he kindly forgave them both, canceling their debts. Who do you suppose loved him more after that?” Simon answered, “I suppose the one for whom he canceled the larger debt.” Luke 7:40-43
Those who realize they are in the most need of forgiveness are the ones who will respond with the most love and gratitude.
Jesus wasn’t trying to point out that Simon was somehow rude, but that the woman showed “extraordinary” love. People who assume they are all good will never experience the kind of love Jesus is offering because they don’t understand their own brokenness.
How does Jesus want you to love others?
Recognize your need for forgiveness and give that to others.
Be lovingHave gratitude: the quality of being thankful; readiness to show appreciation for and to return kindness.
Do you really not understand your own junk?
"But the point of the entire story is that her love is the result of her forgiveness. That love and gratitude flow from forgiveness is clearly the point of the parable (vv. 41–42), and the woman’s actions of love toward Jesus stem from her experience of a forgiveness that has already been received. (Schreiner, T. R. (1995). Luke. In Evangelical Commentary on the Bible (Vol. 3, p. 816). Grand Rapids, MI: Baker Book House.
10/1/2018 • 10 minutes, 15 seconds
Never Never Never and Never - statement #12 from Jesus
“No, I will not abandon you as orphans—I will come to you.” John 14:18
In this statement Jesus is assuring his freaked out disciples during the last supper.
For the Jews, they often compared a Rabbi to a father and if a disciple’s Rabbi died they would compare themselves to orphans.
“A commitment to an ongoing relationship and to the attitude and behaviour demanded by it. It is evident in human relationships and also in the covenant relationship between God and his people.” (Martin Manser)
God keeps his promises, which is the example to follow.
“Let us hold tightly without wavering to the hope we affirm, for God can be trusted to keep his promise.” Hebrews 10:23
“Praise the LORD who has given rest to his people Israel, just as he promised. Not one word has failed of all the wonderful promises he gave through his servant Moses.” 1 Kings 8:56
How does Jesus want you to treat others?
Ruth 1:16-17 “But Ruth replied, “Don’t ask me to leave you and turn back. Wherever you go, I will go; wherever you live, I will live. Your people will be my people, and your God will be my God. Wherever you die, I will die, and there I will be buried. May the LORD punish me severely if I allow anything but death to separate us!”
Never quit. Stay committed. Regardless of their behavior. People don’t have to earn your love and devotion.
Boundaries are still ok
Being honored is still ok
Being friends is different than being committed
Be careful not to complain about this, because as a disciple of Jesus you are constantly called to be like him and do what he did.
What does it take to never quit
Endurance
Patience
Faith - anything is possible...even a miracle!
9/29/2018 • 17 minutes, 56 seconds
You gotta be it to feel it - statement #11 from Jesus
“I have told you these things so that you will be filled with my joy. Yes, your joy will overflow!” John 15:11
Remember how we’ve talked about one of the results of abiding in Jesus and obeying his commands is joy? The fruit of the true disciple is joy, and frankly, no matter what.
Jesus wants you to treat others just like he treats you. It’s what shows people around you that you’re a true disciple of Jesus. The bible uses the word here for joy in two ways. It can either be in feeling or in action.
You are expressing a positive intention about a past or future action/event...
Even how we remember can be covered in joy if we remain in Jesus. And most certainly how we plan to act on some offense in the future matters to Jesus.
How does Jesus want you to love others…
Be filled with JOY, no matter what. Two things stood out to me in trying to understand this statement:
Be joy, in your actions, thoughts and attitude. That kind of freedom is the result of loving Jesus.
Expect joy, treat others in joy because you know that whatever is happening will change and be redeemed somehow by Jesus.
Is 51:11 Those who have been ransomed by the LORD will return. They will enter Jerusalem singing, crowned with everlasting joy. Sorrow and mourning will disappear, and they will be filled with joy and gladness.
Isaiah 41:28 I will open up rivers for them on the high plateaus. I will give them fountains of water in the valleys. I will fill the desert with pools of water. Rivers fed by springs will flow across the parched ground.
Isaiah 55:12 You will live in joy and peace. The mountains and hills will burst into song, and the trees of the field will clap their hands!
John 7:38 Anyone who believes in me may come and drink! For the Scriptures declare, ‘Rivers of living water will flow from his heart.’”
9/28/2018 • 13 minutes, 34 seconds
How brokenness becomes awesomeness
"God blesses those who are poor and realize their need for him, for the Kingdom of Heaven is theirs. God blesses those who mourn, for they will be comforted. God blesses those who are humble, for they will inherit the whole earth." Matthew 5:3-5
In the Sermon on the Mount, Jesus starts with Eight Beatitudes or blessings for a specific type of person/attitude/character. For me, you can summarize Jesus’ promises recorded here as, how joyful are the ones who recognize they only need God!
How does Jesus want you to treat others?
Recognize your need and total dependence on God to love others well. You can’t do it apart from God...period. Develop a humble and God-dependent heart and you will be more gentle with the ones you love and the ones who are difficult.
God-dependent people are simply more gracious and kind and gentle.
You can become like the great Saints of the bible:
David — “The sacrifice acceptable to God is a broken spirit; a broken and contrite heart, O God, thou wilt not despise” (Psalm 51:17). Everyone agrees that this is the spirit that pleases God after you are taken in adultery and murder. But what about the times when you are doing good?
Job — “I had heard of thee by the hearing of the ear, but now my eye sees thee; therefore I despise myself, and repent in dust and ashes” (Job 42:5–6).
Isaiah — “Woe is me! For I am lost; for I am a man of unclean lips, and I dwell in the midst of a people of unclean lips; for my eyes have seen the King, the Lord of hosts!” (Isaiah 6:5).
So we learn from Job and Isaiah that one source of lowliness is to see God in his power and holiness. (www.desiringgod.org)
9/27/2018 • 10 minutes, 41 seconds
The most radical way to love - statement #9 from Jesus
Where individuals sat at an ancient Jewish table for a meal mattered. The seating arrangement was highly important.
Jesus knew who was going to betray him, Judas, and yet he gave Judas the seat to his left! This was the seat reserved by the host for the person designated as most honored guest!
How does Jesus want you to love others?
Be a servant, lay down your life. My dad used to ask women in audience around the world, “How many of you ladies would have a problem submitting to a dead man?”
Extreme example, but it hits the point! You can submit to and serve each other when you feel like the other person has your best interest in mind and isn’t trying to take advantage of you but rather is trying to serve you.
If someone you love is shut down toward you, take the initiative and serve. Serving others is a powerful way to open their spirit back up!
And you serve others regardless of how they are treating you. Jesus knew Judas was going to betray him. He knew it! Yet still he gave Judas the seat of most honored guest out of all the disciples for the last supper.
9/26/2018 • 12 minutes, 29 seconds
If only you were willing to love like this
“For this is how God loved the world: He gave his one and only Son, so that everyone who believes in him will not perish but have eternal life.” John 3:16
“Jesus teaches Nicodemus that God’s only motive is love. Jesus hasn’t been sent into the world to judge, punish and sentence to death. He has come to reveal the light and show the love of God. He longs that people should stop preferring darkness and clinging to shame.” (Knowles, A. (2001). The Bible guide (1st Augsburg books ed., p. 510). Minneapolis, MN: Augsburg.)
So how are you supposed to love others?
Like God loves you
“A twenty-six-word parade of hope: beginning with God, ending with life, and urging us to do the same. Brief enough to write on a napkin or memorize in a moment, yet solid enough to weather two thousand years of storms and questions. If you know nothing of the Bible, start here.” Max Lucado
9/26/2018 • 14 minutes, 4 seconds
What are you worked up about
“So don’t be afraid, little flock. For it gives your Father great happiness to give you the Kingdom.” Luke 12:32
“Little flock” refers to believers who belong to God’s kingdom and live under God’s loving care (vv. 22–31). This image recalls the Old Testament's depiction of God as a caring shepherd of His people (e.g., Psa 77:20; Jer 13:17; Mic 4:8).
The true disciple is not afraid because of a sincere trust in God. The true disciple doesn’t draw their security from things, or people, or places but from God. This makes you free to give to others when called upon.
If their treasure (or security) is money, then that will be their consuming passion. Making money one’s treasure is the path to insecurity… (Schreiner, T. R. (1995). Luke. In Evangelical Commentary on the Bible (Vol. 3, p. 823). Grand Rapids, MI: Baker Book House.)
Why did Jesus make this statement?
“We stop focusing our quest on things, and we start selling what we don’t need and turning our stockpiled resources into ministries of kingdom-bringing love.” John Piper
How does this help your relationship?
"The Romans had a proverb which said that money was like sea water; the more you drink the thirstier you become. Similarly, as long as our attitude is that of the rich fool our desire will always be to get more—and that is the reverse of the Christian way."(Barclay, W. (2001). The Gospel of Luke (p. 195). Louisville, KY; London: Westminster John Knox Press.)
“Worry does not empty tomorrow of its sorrow, it empties today of its strength.” Corrie ten Boom
9/24/2018 • 14 minutes, 8 seconds
The love language of Jesus - statement #6 from Jesus
“If you love me, obey my commandments.”
When he makes this statement, it was a big evening for Jesus. It’s his formal farewell to his disciples, his friends.
And his friends are freaking out! They are scared. How does Jesus decide to comfort them? He promises the Holy Spirit - the great comforter. The one who would guide, teach, encourage, empower, and mediate on behalf of the believer. Ultimately he was giving them the comforting presence of himself - Jesus.
The provision of Jesus that will bring about this relationship is declared to be the indwelling Spirit (vv. 15–17)
Holy Spirit has two new names:
the Paraclete (NIV Counselor, v. 16)
the Spirit of truth
Paraclete (Gk. parakletos) is unique to John (elsewhere 14:26; 15:26; 16:7; 1 John 2:1) and expresses the Spirit’s strengthening, equipping role.
A parakletos was a judicial advocate (cf. Matt. 10:16–20) and here Jesus says that Christians alone can enjoy his aid (John 14:17).
How does this help your relationship?
When you obey and love Jesus, you (and only the one who believes and acts) gets the Holy Spirit!
What does your relationship need…
Strength for tough times...you get thatTruth...you get thatEncouragement...you get thatGuidance...you get thatEmpowerment to treat others like Jesus...you get thatThe comforting presence of Jesus...you get that
“The Christian’s life in all its aspects—intellectual and ethical, devotional and relational, upsurging in worship and outgoing in witness—is supernatural; only the Spirit can initiate and sustain it. So apart from him, not only will there be no lively believers and no lively congregations, there will be no believers and no congregations at all.” – J. I. Packer
9/24/2018 • 8 minutes, 56 seconds
Let His promises protect your relationship - statement #5 from Jesus
Let His promises protect your relationship John 15:5 (Part 1 - the critical importance of intimacy with Jesus) “Yes, I am the vine; you are the branches. Those who remain in me, and I in them, will produce much fruit. For apart from me you can do nothing.”
“What prompts Jesus to use this image? His figures (shepherd, bread, water, light) all came from ancient Jewish traditions. If Jesus left the Upper Room in 14:30, he may have stopped at the temple to teach and to pray. At the entrance of the Holy Place (west of the altar), steps led to a linen curtain covered with purple, scarlet, and blue flowers. Solid gold chains hung alongside the curtain from the door beam. Above the curtain (beneath the roof line) grew a gigantic grapevine of pure gold, representing Israel. Wealthy citizens could bring gifts to add to the vine (gold tendrils, grapes, or leaves), and these would be added by metal workers to the ever-growing vine. Josephus claims that some of the grape clusters were the “height of a man.”
The vine/vineyard metaphor is used frequently in the Old Testament. Israel is often depicted as a vine transplanted from Egypt (Ps. 80:8–11) and brought to fertile soil (Ezek. 17:1–6). Enemies may trample the vineyard (Jer. 12:10–11) but God tends it carefully and looks for fruit (Isa. 5:1–7). The vineyard may be the preeminent biblical symbol of the locus of God’s activity, his nurture, and his expectations (cf. Matt. 21:33–41). (Burge, G. M. (1995). John. In Evangelical Commentary on the Bible (Vol. 3, pp. 869–870). Grand Rapids, MI: Baker Book House.)
Jesus emphasizes two things:
Abide
Proof
How does this help your relationships?
9/22/2018 • 12 minutes, 7 seconds
Hold on for dear life - statement #4 from Jesus
'Jesus said to the people who believed in him, “You are truly my disciples if you remain faithful to my teachings. And you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free.”' John 8:31-32
The NT stresses the need for believers to remain in Christ. The reality of this close personal relationship with Jesus Christ is expressed in obedience to his word and is essential to effective discipleship.
How do you abide in Jesus?
Hold to his teaching (1 John 2:24)
Obedience to him (John 15:10)
Live like Jesus (1 John 2:6)
But this is not accomplished without
Communion (John 6:56)
The Spirit’s anointing (1 John 2:27)
By faith (Ephesians 3:17-19)
How does this help your relationship?
Fruitfulness (John 15:4-5) The picture of “bearing fruit” may cover many aspects of Christian life but it includes that of developing Christian character, effective Christian service and mission. These result, not from human effort, but from abiding in Christ.
Answered Prayer (John 15:16)
Freedom from persistent sin (1 John 3:6-9)
Relationship with God (John 14:23)
Confidence in the last day (1 John 2:28)
“It is only into the thirst of an empty soul that the streams of living waters flow. Ever thirsting is the secret of never thirsting.” Andrew Murray
9/21/2018 • 11 minutes, 37 seconds
The cost of freedom - statement #3 from Jesus
Follow Him John 1:43 (Part 1 - the critical importance of intimacy with Jesus)
“The next day Jesus decided to go to Galilee. He found Philip and said to him, ‘Come, follow me.’”
Our theme so far has been to not just believe, but obey. To respond and don’t waste time doing what Jesus desires most. That is where we find freedom.
Today is about the cost of following Jesus
Your family (Matthew 10:37-38)
Your own life (Luke 14:26-27)
Your pride (Mark 8:34)
In essence, it will cost you anything you value more than Jesus.
We must accept and follow Jesus’ leadership, command and guidance.
How does this help your relationship?
Freedom.
When Jesus is #1, you can’t help but react to that person who matters most to you in a fruit of the spirit! “love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control. There is no law against these things!” Galatians 5:22-23
“Kindness is the language which the deaf can hear and the blind can see.” Mark Twain
9/20/2018 • 11 minutes, 35 seconds
Repent - statement #2 from Jesus
'From then on Jesus began to preach, “Repent of your sins and turn to God, for the Kingdom of Heaven is near.”' Matthew 4:17
A true disciple is not first a learner or reader of his words. You are a doer. In v19 Jesus says, “Come follow me”. The first command of Jesus’ public ministry was, “repent”.
Jesus wants an inward change because nothing else will stick if you don’t first address YOUYour actions need to be immediate
v20 “Immediately they left their nets and followed him.”A friend’s wife was giving a sermon where she shared this same advice, because it’s what she did. Drugs, alcohol, miserable. Meets a janitor at the church who tells her to repent and go and tell everyone that she now believes in Jesus.Repent is “to turn from sin and dedicate oneself to the amendment of one’s life.”
9/19/2018 • 19 minutes, 50 seconds
The transformational power of Jesus' words
The transformational power of Jesus’ words John 14:23
"Jesus replied,“All who love me will do what I say. My Father will love them, and we will come and make our home with each of them.” John 14:23
If you really love Jesus, you’ll do what he says!
Get to know his commands
All his commands are either about loving God or loving others.
“The first thing to notice is that loving Jesus is not the same as keeping his commandments. It precedes and gives rise to keeping the commandments. Keeping his word is the result of loving him, not the same as loving him.” John Piper
Love is the root, obedience is the fruit.
God responds to our love and loves with a unique, personal, intimate, affectionate, caring, committed love that belongs only to those who love his Son.
We get the Holy Spirit
We get Jesus. He will give us what orphans need: they need protection and provision and guidance.
So how does this transform your marriage?
When you feel lost, you’ve got the Holy Spirit
“Therefore, love him. Keep his sweet commandments to receive him and abide in him. Overflow with his fullness for others in love. And he will come to you, and the Holy Spirit will come and the Father will come, and they will protect you and provide for you and lead you — you won’t be an orphan. And they will comfort you, and love you in a very personal way the world does not know, and they will manifest Jesus to you, and make you their home.” John Piper
9/18/2018 • 19 minutes, 23 seconds
The best marriages have GRIT [replay]
Great relationships have grit: Passion and Perseverance
GRIT: firmness of character; indomitable spirit; pluck (dictionary.com)
Passion
an intense desire or enthusiasm for something. strong and barely controllable emotion.
a thing arousing enthusiasm.
the suffering and death of Jesus.
Perseverance
steadfastness in doing something despite difficulty or delay in achieving success.
other words for perseverance: persistence, tenacity, determination, staying power, steadfastness, purposefulness…
What does this mean for your relationship? Everything!
9/4/2018 • 35 minutes, 4 seconds
Married on Purpose - Dream Implementation
'Watch what God does, and then you do it, like children who learn proper behavior from their parents. Mostly what God does is love you. Keep company with him and learn a life of love. Observe how Christ loved us. His love was not cautious but extravagant. He didn’t love in order to get something from us but to give everything of himself to us. Love like that. Ephesians 5:1-2 MSG
What is your dream statement
To honor God and others by relentlessly pursuing authentic relationships, valuing hospitality, self-awareness, diversity, adventure, joy and freedom in Christ.
Validate each other’s dreams
Your official Dream Statement should be a healthy combination of both your desires.
Matthew 7:12 “Do to others whatever you would like them to do to you. This is the essence of all that is taught in the law and the prophets.”
Ask what we can do to further develop and encourage each other’s dreams.
What do you think would be the best way for us to pursue authentic relationships?
What kind of adventure would be fun or exciting for you?
Decide on a win/win for your statement
8/28/2018 • 37 minutes, 1 second
Married on Purpose - The Game Plan
Without a clear and defined purpose (which we will from now on refer to as your DREAM) how can you expect your marriage to be all it can be? If you do not know where you are headed together as a couple, or what kind of legacy you want to leave through your children and moments of your marriage, then how can you expect to truly enjoy your marriage. Spending day after day in a bottomless pit of indecision, confusion, and lack of a dream will (or already has) take a huge toll on your marriage happiness and enjoyment.
“A man without a vision is a man without a future. A man without a future will always return to his past.” (P.K. Bernard)
“With a clear vision of what we can become in Christ, no ocean of difficulty is too great. Without it, we rarely move beyond our current boundaries.” Lynn Anderson, “They Smell Like Sheep: Spiritual Leadership for the 21st Century”
Psalms 20:4 “May he grant your heart’s desires and make all your plans succeed.”
“Vision is the bridge between the present and the future. Without it we perish or go “unrestrained,” as the New American Standard Bible puts it. Vision gives pain a purpose. Those without vision spend their lives taking the path of least resistance as they try to avoid discomfort. The level of sacrifice that a vision requires will determine the size of people who follow. Sacrifice separates the small from the great.” Kris Vallotton
Our DREAM statement
To honor God and others by relentlessly pursuing authentic relationships, valuing hospitality, self-awareness, diversity, adventure, joy and freedom in Christ.
8/21/2018 • 36 minutes
Bright Tomorrows - a story about mental illness and two psychotic breaks
Tim and Nancy's story should inspire anyone about what it takes to stay committed to each other through "sickness and in health"!
Tim wrote:
Since 1979 I have lived with the consequences of a brain-based mental health challenge called bipolar disorder. Through these years I have experienced episodes of extreme mania, protracted periods of dark depression, as well as eruptions of psychosis.
Dr. Kay Redfield Jamison, a leading authority and herself a diagnosed bipolar, clearly expresses the effects of this brain disorder in her book, “Touched with Fire.” She wrote that bipolar illness “encompasses the extremes of human experience. Thinking can range from florid psychosis, or ‘madness,’ to patterns of unusually clear, fast, and creative associations, to retardation [slowing down] so profound that no meaningful activity can occur.”* This very succinctly and accurately describes how I have often experienced bipolar disorder.
Hear their story through this special interview and learn how to "reflect the compassion of Jesus Christ to those with mental health concerns".
8/14/2018 • 53 minutes, 36 seconds
Relentless Community
Relentless Community
Hebrews 10:23-25 “23 Let us hold tightly without wavering to the hope we affirm, for God can be trusted to keep his promise. 24 Let us think of ways to motivate one another to acts of love and good works. 25 And let us not neglect our meeting together, as some people do, but encourage one another, especially now that the day of his return is drawing near.”
Live your life each day with a purpose, to stir one another to acts of love and good works.
Why do you wake up each day? If you don’t ask yourself this question, you are purposeless which is like lifelessness.
Community isn’t a story, it’s an experience and filled with story after story after story. It’s why I came here for my surgery.
I knew I would be
Loved
Not judged
Encouraged
Filled with hope
God’s plan for your life is to wake up each day and…
Choose hope (v23)
Because he is a promise keeper, and there is nothing we need to fear
But this isn’t the kind of hope you sit on, your hope should stir you up to act, and guess what God wants you to do with this hope?
Stir up each other to love and good worksConsider each other
8/7/2018 • 42 minutes, 30 seconds
Relentless Grace
Relentless Grace
No matter how far you run away or how disobedient you are, God still loves you and bathes you with His unending grace
Phillip Holmes wrote, “He’s not ignorant of all the ways we’ve sinned against him. He knows everything we’ve ever done and is able to stomach it. His knowledge of who we really are will never hinder his love for us. He’s even aware of the evil behind our righteous deeds. The intimacy by which the Lord knows us but is able to lovingly embrace us as his children is supernatural. God’s grace is mind-blowing. Every time I think of this reality, I’m brought to tears because I serve a God whose love and grace baffle me.” https://www.desiringgod.org/articles/gods-grace-is-mind-blowing
I blatantly rejected the voice of the Holy Spirit
Heaviest - 138 kilograms
I’ve lost 18 kilograms in three weeks
No pain, no recovery, no problems of any kind!
Joel 2:12-14 'But there’s also this, it’s not too late— God ’s personal Message!— “Come back to me and really mean it! Come fasting and weeping, sorry for your sins!” Change your life, not just your clothes. Come back to God, your God. And here’s why: God is kind and merciful.He takes a deep breath, puts up with a lot, This most patient God, extravagant in love, always ready to cancel catastrophe. Who knows? Maybe he’ll do it now, maybe he’ll turn around and show pity. Maybe, when all’s said and done, there’ll be blessings full and robust for your God!
God’s pleasure is to give you the Kingdom!
7/31/2018 • 48 minutes, 57 seconds
[re-air] Four things every couple needs to know about sex
Today we are talking about sex, possibly one of the greatest gifts outside of eternal life God ever gave humankind! To help us with this conversation, Dave Willis of strongermarriages.com, is going to lend his expertise...and trust me, this guy has millions of readers, likes, and more.
Coming up next we talk about the 4 things every couple needs to know about sex.
About Dave and Ashley Willis (www.strongermarriages.com)
Almost 1 million likes on their Facebook page!https://www.facebook.com/strongermarriages/Millions of readers on their blogPastor at Stevens Creek Church near Augusta, GeorgiaAuthors of The 7 Day Marriage Challenge (Husband edition and Wife edition)4 things every couple needs to know about sex
Where do you come up with all this great content?
Who was your inspiration to get into marriage ministry?
What’s the worst fight you and Ashley have had?
Most MEN see sex as a form of stress relief while most WOMEN need stress relief BEFORE they can be in mindset to make love.Deeper TRANSPARENCY outside the bedroom leads to deeper INTIMACY inside the bedroom.Keep your FANTASIES focused on each other. Don’t just be PHYSICALLY monogamous; be MENTALLY monogamous too.Don’t forget to have FUN!
7/24/2018 • 51 minutes, 13 seconds
The biggest killers to sexual intimacy and how to eliminate them
The health of your emotional relationship
If you don’t feel loved, you don’t want to show love
The specific things you are doing to kill your sexual intimacy
Invalidation
How you respond to your spouse matters.
Lack of affirmation
Negative beliefs
Here’s how you eliminate them
Invalidation
Start to validate each other
Empathize
Lack of affirmation
Make a list of what you appreciate about your spouse (you can do this on our app)
Don’t wait till you feel like affirming your spouse, do it because it is the right thing to do. Your spouse isn’t pure evil!
Negative beliefs
Ask questions
Assume the best instead of the worst all the time
Each one of these fixes takes important choices. Stop acting like a victim and do the right thing regardless of whether your spouse deserves it.
7/11/2018 • 39 minutes, 5 seconds
Top 10 Ways to Hack Your Husbands Sex Drive
Initiate don’t hesitate… “So slide over here; And give me a moment; Your moves are so raw; I've got to let you know; I've got to let you know; You're one of my kind…”
“Honestly, do you really even need a list?” so said my 20 yr old daughter!
Be open to change and creativity.
Build excitement and anticipation.
Serve up a five star meal, meat and potatoes or a fast food meal.
Enjoy sex with him, because he truly desires your pleasure too!
Stop criticizing him for being a man, sex is not just for pleasure, it is also his way to bond with you and connect emotionally.
Leave the lights on for a possible change, men tend to be visually stimulated.
Be affirming.
Plan sex. That’s right, talk with your husband and discover how many times he’d enjoy having sex in a month and what kinds of things he enjoys.
7/3/2018 • 31 minutes, 29 seconds
How to survive the drive
How to survive the drive!
Keep it positive
Give each other the benefit of the doubt
Are you really supposed to blow everything off?
No, you can’t really, but before you say anything
Ask yourself, “Is this a life or death issue?”
“Could I be judged for the same thing?”
In the heat of the moment, should you wait, even if it’s just five minutes?
What’s my goal in saying anything...Shame? Apology? Correct?
In order to survive the drive, chill, take a breath, and keep these questions front and center if anything comes up.
6/26/2018 • 18 minutes, 10 seconds
Tonight - Top 10 ways guaranteed to turn your wife on
This isn't just another top 10 list! In fact, the first thing on the list is something my father shared with me before I got married, and let me tell you, he was right! Amy joins me once again to have an honest conversation about how to experience the best sex of your life!
In today's show, we give you the top 10 things a husband can do to get his wife excited about sex. You'll be surprised by some of them, but there's something important we discuss that every man better know!
5/22/2018 • 45 minutes, 5 seconds
Tonight - oral sex, toys and more
One of the most popular posts on our website is titled, "Is oral sex ok for a Christian couple?" It's time we clear some things up for couples and what is allowed or not allowed sexually between a husband and wife. Is there any limit to how a husband and wife can pleasure each other when it comes to sex?
Discover how to have an honest conversation with your spouse about sex and what you like and what you don't like.
5/15/2018 • 43 minutes, 2 seconds
New series Tonight: Why married sex is the best sex
Married sex is the best sex
Why do a series of shows on sex? Married sex is the best sex!
Because it seems as though this is the topic of conversation you, the listener is most interested in.
Our number one show is titled “Is Oral sex allowed for a Christian couple”.
Oddly enough most couples don’t ever truly learn about the needs and desires of their spouse...so we are going to help facilitate a conversation about them.
There is still a lot of misinformation out there for couples, we want to clear the air and get you on the right path for a healthy sex life.
Let’s start off this series with some good ole healthy facts and figures about sex and the married couple
Married people have the best sex
Sex isn’t only about personal pleasure, it’s about loving someone unconditionally and meeting their needs intimacy wise.
PsychologyToday.com “For example, if you have sex twice a week you may experience the equivalent of being two years younger than your chronological age, as well as benefiting from a significant enhancement in the health and efficiency of the heart, respiratory system, and maintaining muscle strength.”
5/8/2018 • 44 minutes, 53 seconds
Your Story Matters John and Erin
Have you ever wanted to quit on your relationship, because you feel like it’s just too hard? We’ve got another episode of Your Story Matters today, meet John and Erin Kadleck.
Your story is God’s story. He gets the glory for your redemption.
They rushed to get married, because he was getting deployed to Afghanistan.
“He came back a different person.”
“He was keeping things from me to protect me.”
As he withdrew, she felt more rejected and felt like it was her fault.
John would drink himself to sleep every night.
Poor communication spiraled out-of-control.
Sometimes our hearts are in the right place, but we have poor execution.
John’s fear was that if he shared his struggles or fears, Erin would reject him.
Holding the secrets from her, was a dark cloud in their relationship.
After he shared, all Erin did was hug John.
Erin had a strong commitment, and it was her commitment to the marriage and John that kept them together through the hard times.
“I was pushing her away, isolating myself, and then getting upset that she wasn’t giving me what I wanted.”
“Can people look at our marriage and see God.”
John had to take ownership for his actions. “Whatever heat rounds she sent my way, I deserved it, and I needed to take it.”
The only way John could overcome the ography addiction and the shame from the affair was to run to God. He had to pray through breaking the cycle of addiction and surrendering to God. “Break these chains for me!”
5/1/2018 • 40 minutes, 5 seconds
Relationship advice from Smeagol, Sean Connery, and I guess Jonathan Decker
Jonathan Decker is the clinical director of Your Family Expert. He is a licensed marriage and family therapist, husband, and father of five. Jonathan earned a masters degree in family therapy from Auburn University as well as a bachelor’s degree in clinical psychology from Brigham Young University. He runs YourFamilyExpert.com.
He’s a “genius billionaire playboy”. Stage comedy. Passionate about interface efforts to strengthen families and communities. He won the BYU talent show for his one man act based on the Lord of the Rings.
Five kids? How do you manage that and what are you going to do when they all turn into teenagers?
What does “Vulnerable = Powerful” mean to you and how does that impact a relationship?
“Our country is a dysfunctional family.”
Celebrity impressions
Pee Wee Herman
Napoleon Dynamite Kermit
Smeagle
Sean Connery
Chewbacca
You do movie reviews, give me one word reviews for the following movies
The Exorcist?
Mary Poppins?
Deliverance?
Pete the Magic Dragon?
A Quiet Place?
Robin Hood with Kevin Costner
What’s been the biggest thing you’ve found to help couples get along?
4/25/2018 • 46 minutes, 25 seconds
Your Story Matters Amanda Voigt - Infertility
"Though paved with pain and heartache, the seasons I struggled the most have also become the seasons I cherish the most. For in those seasons, I found myself at the feet of a good, good Father, lavished with grace, mercy and hope." Amanda Voigt
Amanda’s journey with infertility. How did it all unravel?
“It’s lonely.” “Your friends get the dream and you’re not.”
“I had to be excited to see my best friend’s baby in the hospital.”
How does it feel when people try to “Christianese” your suffering.
“It’s a blow when you’re already down.”
You just need to sit with someone and try to feel what they are feeling.
Don’t try and make it better or find answers for them.
How did you manage the process of infertility?
Looking to adopt.
Insurance ended up paying for it with Luke’s new job.
It’s not wrong to seek infertility treatment.
What did your journey with God look like?
“I got knocked to my knees.”
Broke down with her mother, and her mother realized she couldn’t fix it for her.
God spoke to her and reminded her to trust Him.
He would walk with her along this journey.
God doesn’t make mistakes. He brings purpose out of the pain.
“This is going to matter one day.”
Trust God especially when it doesn’t feel good and you’re unhappy.
Almost died from infection after giving birth to her first child.
“God...she’s given up, don’t give up on us.” Luke, her husband prayed all night in the hospital room, and each time a nurse or doctor came into the room he would ask, “Is there something I can pray for you about?”
4/17/2018 • 30 minutes, 11 seconds
Your Story Matters Lauren Zachry - Addiction
Your Story Matters is a series of shows focused on you, the listener. Listen as Amy Smalley showcases women's stories of triumph and victory over seemingly impossible obstacles. Each woman featured in this series of special podcasts has a story to share that will inspire and motivate you.
Today's show features Lauren Zachry, a woman plagued by drugs but pursued by an unconditionally loving man. If you struggle in life, you don't want to miss this show because Lauren's story can lead you to feel like you're "drowning in joy"!
4/10/2018 • 41 minutes, 12 seconds
Four things every couple needs to know about sex
Today we are talking about sex, possibly one of the greatest gifts outside of eternal life God ever gave humankind! To help us with this conversation, Dave Willis of strongermarriages.com, is going to lend his expertise...and trust me, this guy has millions of readers, likes, and more.
Coming up next we talk about the 4 things every couple needs to know about sex.
About Dave and Ashley Willis (www.strongermarriages.com)
Almost 1 million likes on their Facebook page!
https://www.facebook.com/strongermarriages/Millions of readers on their blogPastor at Stevens Creek Church near Augusta, GeorgiaAuthors of The 7 Day Marriage Challenge (Husband edition and Wife edition)
4 things every couple needs to know about sex
Where do you come up with all this great content?Who was your inspiration to get into marriage ministry?What’s the worst fight you and Ashley have had?Most MEN see sex as a form of stress relief while most WOMEN need stress relief BEFORE they can be in mindset to make love.Deeper TRANSPARENCY outside the bedroom leads to deeper INTIMACY inside the bedroom.Keep your FANTASIES focused on each other. Don’t just be PHYSICALLY monogamous; be MENTALLY monogamous too.Don’t forget to have FUN!
4/3/2018 • 50 minutes, 13 seconds
The four most important things to know about your marriage
Did you ever have that friend in college that you just couldn’t get rid of? Me too, in fact, I’ve been trying to get rid of the guy on my show today for more than 20 years! But now he’s made it onto my podcast, and he’s actually got something very cool he wants to share with you today.
We are talking cars, marriage, and possibly the four most important things you need to maintain in order for your marriage to thrive!
3/27/2018 • 47 minutes, 47 seconds
The LOVE Talk wrap-up show
Over the last 6 shows you’ve learned the core skill taught in every one of our Smalley Marriage Intensives. Love Talk is by far the most powerful way to communicate with someone. It is where feelings and needs can get expressed in a way that leads you naturally into win/win solutions. Healthy communication is not Rocket Science! But there are a few rules you need to understand and use when you are dealing with difficult topics or hurt feelings.
3/20/2018 • 15 minutes, 31 seconds
Win - Win solutions are at the heart of any dynamic relationship
You are catching us at the tail end of our series on LOVE Talk, the most powerful communication method on earth! Last show you learned how to share your feeling and needs as the customer in a way that helps others receive them and honor them. This week you get to learn how to find win/win solutions to your toughest conflicts. You don't have to live with unresolved conflict any longer. There are just a couple of things you need to learn in order to reach solutions where you both can be happy!
3/13/2018 • 14 minutes, 16 seconds
Share in a way others can't help but validate you
The last time we were with you, you discovered the role of employee and how that may be the most important role we learn when it comes to conflict resolution. On today’s show, you are going to learn how to be a great customer. You’ll want to list today, because we are going to show you how to communicate your feelings and needs (the most important things you want to share) in a way that your spouse or others can't help but to listen and validate you.
3/6/2018 • 15 minutes, 27 seconds
Learn how to listen like a champion
Previously on Smalley Marriage Radio you discovered the most powerful way to stop STUPID conflict by using a time-out. Today, you get to learn the role of employee, that if I’m honest, is possibly the most important role you can learn when it comes to resolving conflict.
LOVE is the essence of LOVE Talk! (Listen, Own, Validate, and Express)The employee only worries about Listening and Validating.
2/27/2018 • 14 minutes, 16 seconds
The power of a timeout to stop stupid arguments
How timeouts help you stop stupid conflict:
Stop escalating,Get away from each other, this allows you to calm downPray, this allows you to gain perspectiveOwn your part, this allows your partner to hear you and not be so defensive
2/20/2018 • 14 minutes, 16 seconds
The most easy way to understand the heart of communication
Last show we talked about the importance of having structure in how you resolve conflict. So you can’t just go all willy-nilly during conflict and think you’re going to get anything solved.
Today is about the most powerful word picture in the history of the world when it comes to resolving conflict! If you’re going to resolve conflict, then you are trying to replicate the experience you get when going through the drive-through at a Chick-fil-a.
2/13/2018 • 14 minutes, 11 seconds
Is oral sex allowed for a Christian couple
I just received this question and it jumped right off the page at me!
“Is oral sex something that is OK with the Lord, and, is it ok to dress up in a little nurse costume, or such.
I know this sounds so crazy, but I am about to go out of my mind needing to know the answers to this question! We have two boys coming up and I want them to have the best life possible in the Lord………these questions are just not talked about enough!
Thank you for your time and answer. May God richly bless you and all of your family!
MICHAEL: I hate couples who miss out on the joy of sex with each other because they think there are some dos and don’ts—mainly developed through misconceptions.
AMY: That’s right. As married couples, we should be the most open with one another.
MICHAEL: But I just have to hear it from a female. Do you think oral sex is okay?
AMY: I truly do think it’s okay. Within the confines of the relationship, I do. We are one man and one woman, and we are exploring each other’s bodies. We are created for each other’s pleasure. And part of that is oral sex.
MICHAEL: Absolutely. So, there is nothing wrong with it.
But it is okay, again, as long as you are enjoying each other sexually, exploring, coming up with new ideas for each other, and you are both on board. Once sex becomes a deal about me and what I want, and I don’t care what your opinion is or whether you are comfortable or not, then we have a problem.
2/8/2018 • 3 minutes, 21 seconds
LOVE Talk - the most powerful communication method on earth
Do you ever get into conflict? I’m in conflict every other day with my wife! And we help couples for a living! Today you are going to discover, possibly, the most important thing about resolving conflict…and you don’t know about it! But no longer, we are going to reveal this truth as we unpack resolving conflict as a couple.
If you are going to resolve conflict, you have to have structure!LOVE Talk stands for Listen-Own-Validate-Express
2/7/2018 • 14 minutes
Live calls and how to protect your children from predators
Dr. Larry Nasser is dominating the news right now, and for good reason! How in the world did he get away with harming so many young ladies? What can you do as a loving parent to protect your own child from people like Nasser?
These questions and more will be answered on today's broadcast. I will also be taking your live calls, so get ready for some real advice on how you can build a better relationship starting today!
Here's a little cheat sheet of the show today:
"JANE REMEMBERS THE linoleum floor in the bathroom of Larry Nassar's apartment. She remembers feeling strange as he walked in and handed her gymnastics magazines to read as she lay fully naked in his bathtub. She was 12 or 13; she can't recall exactly." (http://www.espn.com/espn/otl/story/_/id/22046031/michigan-state-university-doctor-larry-nassar-surrounded-enablers-abused-athletes-espn)
More than 150 women who reported him
US Gymastics seemingly ignored
NCAA ignored
Michigan state ignored
Why?
Heard an interview on Dan Lebatard show today, former athlete sharing how he got in trouble for taking coffee from the coaches office...
How can you protect your child?
All you can do is your best
Don't be naive
Make sure your child feels safe enough to share with you
1/31/2018 • 53 minutes, 18 seconds
A conversation with a menopause expert
What a show today! I get to interview Rhonda Jolliffe, the founder of rhondanp.com. What's so great about the show today? We have one of the most honest and frank conversations about menopause ever! Rhonda has great insight for women who might be experiencing menopause but we also address how menopause impacts a relationship and what to do about it.
About 20 years helping women through menopause
The creator of rhondanp.com
Get a free course, just visit rhondanp.com/smalley
Understand the positives of menopause.
Does menopause help creativity for women?
What are some of the best things women can do for menopause?
Tips for husbands with wives going through menopause.
Andropause, it’s the menopause for men!
1/16/2018 • 32 minutes, 55 seconds
How to end it well
My co-host Seth takes over the show today!
Seth wants to talk about ending well.
Every good thing sometimes comes to an end
Dating, marriage, business, etc.
How to end well
“Ending well means intentionally setting aside time for reflection and acknowledgment, time to name the cost, the enormity of the work and everything that has gone into it, and name the moments of grace and beauty that helped carry us through.” The Allender Center
Don’t dismiss it or avoid it
Embrace the awkwardness
Don’t lie
What are your favorite memories?
1/9/2018 • 40 minutes, 45 seconds
The over spiritualization syndrome
A single guy asked a question for the show that hit some serious buttons for me. I wouldn’t say I’m angry, because I’m not, but I am definitely worked up because I feel like single Christian people get themselves into the most ridiculous situations because...well, I’ll save the rest for the show.
“My ex girlfriend and I have been in and out of a relationship for the last two years. we recently started talking again. The reason for the in and out is because she went on a missions trip and started to feel like God may be calling her to full time ministry in another country. We both want to get married but everything that she feels God has been doing in her life over the past two years doesn't allow us to grow in our relationship because of the lack of security of not knowing if she will even be around for much longer if God "calls her" to the mission field. She has been unsure of her calling and doesn't know for sure if God is calling her so she's been pursuing different opportunities and something legit seems to be in the works. I'm open to full time ministry if God were to lay it on my heart but he hasn't in the way he has for her. And I don't think it's right for me to pursue ministry just because I don't want to lose her. The way things are now is that we don't talk every day. We talk as I say, "consistently, inconsistently." It's really been a waiting game to see what God does. I guess my question is, is this something she just needs to make a decision on or keep waiting for God to open the right door? I believe she's worth the wait but I struggle if it's the wise decision. Please advise!”
1/2/2018 • 44 minutes, 17 seconds
What we teach may harm your relationship
“You've talked about taking a timeout when things get too heated. I feel my husband uses this phrase as a way of avoiding the problems we face. Unfortunately, communication in our marriage has become so unpleasant and difficult that timeouts have become a lifestyle and we have virtually no communication. I'm talking like years and years, at least 15. At this point I feel we have no connection and no relationship, along with so many unresolved issues I don't even know where to start. We have been married for 35 yrs. I don't want to give up, but I do not want to live the rest of my life with a hostile stranger. HELP!”
If this sounds like you...then listen to the show.
12/26/2017 • 33 minutes, 33 seconds
Is it ever ok to walk away from your marriage
Today we take on one of the shortest, yet intense questions asked by a listener yet! I’ll just let you read it for yourself, “Is there a walking away point in marriage?” I don’t know...is there? We’ll answer this question on today's show.
“My wife wants a divorce, I do not. She wants the four kids and I am supposed to move out. I want reconciliation, she says ‘No chance, ever!’ What do I do?”
Respect the boundary even though it seems counterproductive
Give her the space she is demanding
Let her know you would love a chance to hear what you can do to repair the relationship, but you’ll be patient till she is ready
In the meantime
Get help
Counseling, mentor, discipleship
Make changes
She needs to see and experience the change...not hear about it
Let your actions do the talking for you
Listen to our series A Hero’s Guide to Winning Back Your Wife
https://www.smalleyinstitute.com/blog?tag=hero%27s+guide+to+winning+back+your+wife
12/19/2017 • 33 minutes, 52 seconds
Talking to yourself makes a huge impact
On Saturday Night Live, a character named Stuart Smalley used to say, “I'm good enough, I'm smart enough, and dog gone it people like me.” I’m not sure we’ve ever had a better introduction to the show...ever! Today we discuss the benefits of talking to yourself and how it can positively impact your relationships.
12/12/2017 • 25 minutes, 11 seconds
The Church Marriage Strategy
Why we are doing a show like today is beyond me! Because I know at first, you’re going to be thinking to yourself, “How is this going to help me? I’m not a pastor or a leader at a church.” Well my listening friends, all that needs to change today. Because you need to know what an effective church marriage strategy looks like so you can begin harassing your church leadership to implement it. But it can also help your relationship specifically, if you’re willing to do the same things for your own marriage.
12/5/2017 • 53 minutes, 4 seconds
A conversation with the "Sex Master"
What's healthy when it comes to sexual intimacy in marriage? This episode is definitely not for little ears, a warning to those parents who might not want their kids to hear an honest and frank discussion about sex. I've got Dave Willis on the show and we don't shy away from anything when discussion sexual intimacy.
11/28/2017 • 41 minutes, 16 seconds
Benefits of a lion attack – sort of
I am the survivor of a vicious lion attack. It happened this past June, and it may be the reason our family is closer than ever. What is the secret to a close-knit family?
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11/21/2017 • 49 minutes, 30 seconds
What if she does come back – Hero’s Guide to Winning Back Your Wife
It’s the ninth show in our series called, The Hero’s Guide to Winning Back Your Wife! It is the final show (until Seth reminds me that we need to do a wrap-up show) of the series. Last show we had to walk you through the possibility that your wife won’t come back.
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11/14/2017 • 44 minutes, 51 seconds
What if she doesn’t come back – Hero’s Guide to Winning Back Your Wife
It’s the eighth show of our series, The Hero’s Guide to Winning Back Your Wife. Sometimes, the hero’s journey doesn’t have a hollywood ending. It can be more like the ending of Cold Mountain with Jude Law and Nicole Kidman.
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11/7/2017 • 1 hour, 1 minute, 46 seconds
Asking the all powerful question – Hero’s Guide to Winning Back Your Wife
We’ve landed on the seventh week in our series, The Hero’s Guide to Winning Back Your Wife. Today’s show could possibly be the most important of the entire series because you are going to learn the one question you have to ask.
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10/31/2017 • 46 minutes, 55 seconds
How a real man seeks forgiveness – Hero’s Guide to Winning Back Your Wife
This is our sixth installment of the Hero’s Guide to Winning Back Your Wife series! Today you get to discover exactly how a real man seeks forgiveness.
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10/24/2017 • 38 minutes, 42 seconds
Why she’s always right – The Hero’s Guide to Winning Back Your Wife
Today you’re going to learn, perhaps, one of the quickest ways you can win back the heart of your wife.
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10/17/2017 • 42 minutes, 3 seconds
It starts with you: Hero’s Guide to Winning Back Your Wife
Today we talk about one of the best ways you can stop the miserable conflict dance you learned about in episode two and you’re not going to like it.
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10/10/2017 • 43 minutes, 45 seconds
Every hero has been humbled – A Hero’s Guide to Winning Back Your Wife
“It was pride that changed angels into devils; it is humility that makes men as angels.” Saint Augustine. You’ll never guess what we’re talking about today.
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10/3/2017 • 31 minutes, 38 seconds
How you lost her in the first place – A Hero’s Guide to Winning Back Your Wife
It’s the second show of The Hero’s Guide To Winning Back Your Wife, and it is a big show! Today you are doing to learn exactly how you lost your wife in the first place...and my guess is...you never knew it was because of this one thing.
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9/26/2017 • 41 minutes, 37 seconds
A Hero’s Guide To Winning Back Your Wife – who’s your daddy
Today we start a special series on The Hero’s Guide To Winning Back Your Wife. It’s based on a new book I’m writing with my brother-in-law Roger Gibson for men who want to build the marriage of their dreams.
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9/19/2017 • 46 minutes, 35 seconds
Can separation heal a troubled marriage?
One of our listeners asks some questions that deal with some real and troubling things. Is a separation a good thing for a troubled marriage? How do you handle a spouse who’s been diagnosed with a personality disorder? Can divorce actually help create a clean slate for your relationship to reboot or start over again? Answers to these questions are coming up next.
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9/12/2017 • 44 minutes, 25 seconds
Before you hit send – an interview with Emerson Eggerichs
Today’s guest is the best-selling author of Love and Respect, Dr. Emerson Eggerichs. He’s got a new book out titled, Before You Hit Send. Today you are going to learn about the 4 things you must ask yourself before you hit that oftentimes catastrophic “send” button.
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9/5/2017 • 32 minutes, 16 seconds
Dr. Gary Chapman is on the show! Is there such a thing as a bad love language?
Today we get to chat with one of America’s best-known marriage experts. His books have sold millions of copies around the world, but for me, he will always be known as the “wrong Gary”. I can’t count the amount of times I watched my own father, Dr. Gary Smalley, sign a book actually written by[...]
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8/29/2017 • 45 minutes, 46 seconds
Les Parrott is on the show and he’ll blow your socks off
The man we have on the show today is potentially the most prolific writer I’ve ever known! In fact, I’m a little irritated to even be doing this interview because he makes me look like a lazy, uninspired writer...which is not cool. But Dr. Les Parrott can’t be denied because he has a powerful new online assessment for couples that will literally “blow your socks off”, and I am quoting him on that.
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8/22/2017 • 24 minutes, 4 seconds
Gary Thomas of Sacred Marriage is on the show!
Hello listeners, today we have a special guest who is just another super famous marriage expert with the first name Gary. You’ve probably heard of him before and even read his best-selling book, Sacred Marriage. On the show today is author Gary Thomas, and we’re going to ask him why a good marriage has to start with a funeral.
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8/15/2017 • 32 minutes, 56 seconds
How to have a truly horrible vacation
Years ago my wife and I were on a vacation for her family’s reunion. We were there for an entire week and Amy’s mother asked me to do something that I’ll never forget. It was, in my opinion extremely obnoxious and way outside my comfort zone! I was trapped, felt betrayed, and still managed to have fun on the vacation because of something I’ve taught for over 20 years now.
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8/8/2017 • 38 minutes, 34 seconds
What to do when your spouse negative beliefs you to death
Today we take on a great question from one of our live events. I just loved the wording of her question and knew our listeners could benefit from the answer. She wrote, “How do you get past a spouse who does not listen to what you say verbally but rather goes by what he thinks he thinks you mean. Like an underlying meaning behind the words.”
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8/1/2017 • 35 minutes, 22 seconds
Ten mistakes you make trying to attract your man
Seth and I are not women. Not sure why I felt the need to establish that right out of the gate, but never-the-less, it is true. So because we are guys, we felt like we could give some helpful hints to the ladies about what it takes to be attractive to your man. Full disclosure…these[...]
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7/25/2017 • 40 minutes, 1 second
The rising risk of being ghosted
There’s a rising risk to dating in this day and age…and it’s name is Ghosted. Never heard of someone being ghosted before? Don’t feel too bad, because neither had I! But ghosting is a real thing, and worse, it is a dishonorable thing to do to someone. Today we are going to explain what it[...]
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7/18/2017 • 48 minutes, 42 seconds
How you can force your spouse to be better
One of our listeners asked recently: “if I have a concern I need to share with her – but she refuses to hear it, or receive it – what do I do? How do I “make” her realize what I want her to improve upon in our marriage. These things aren’t once in a blue[...]
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7/11/2017 • 35 minutes, 2 seconds
There is more to freedom than July 4th
July 4th is one of my favorite holidays. And it’s not just that I get to light things on fire and throw a huge party for all my friends. I love July 4th because of what it reminds me of. And no, it is not about the personal freedoms I get because of our great[...]
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7/4/2017 • 29 minutes, 26 seconds
Do you feel like you can’t measure up?
Have you ever felt like you just don’t measure up to what your spouse wants? This can feel overwhelming because of the kinds of buttons it pushes. But take heart, my friends, there is a solution to this issue, and the best part is…it’s you! If you are wanting immediate help with your relationship,[...]
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6/27/2017 • 37 minutes, 22 seconds
How to deal with an unsafe spouse
What on earth can you do when you don’t feel “safe” to share your feelings or needs with your spouse? This is a tough one, because in order to share intimate things with your spouse, you need to feel safe. Talk about being stuck between a rock and a even harder rock! But don’t be[...]
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6/20/2017 • 36 minutes, 44 seconds
When you mess up big time
One of you, our amazing listeners, has submitted an impossible question…so of course we are going to take on this question and possibly give some of you hope when you think there is no hope. If you are wanting immediate help with your relationship, please check out our online library of marriage and parenting courses![...]
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6/13/2017 • 39 minutes, 30 seconds
Overcoming difficult issues
Is there something your spouse has brought in to your marriage that is making your relationship difficult? Today we are answering one of your questions on the show because sometimes there are things out of your control that you have to learn how to deal with, or the relationship will suffer. We’re going to help[...]
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6/6/2017 • 57 minutes, 11 seconds
Boys in crisis
There is a crisis for boys today, if you haven’t noticed yet. Today we talk about Dr. Warren Farrell who has a new book coming out next year titled, “Boys in Crisis ”. What’s the crisis you ask…none other than the fate of all humankind. We’ll define the crisis but more importantly, help you discover how[...]
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5/30/2017 • 43 minutes, 26 seconds
Laura Doyle and The Empowered Wife
Today’s show has a special guest, Laura Doyle author of The Empowered Wife. I wanted to come up with some creative introduction, but then I went to her website and found the perfect intro. “Laura Doyle was great wife material–until she actually got married. When she tried to tell her husband how to be tidier,[...]
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5/25/2017 • 45 minutes, 25 seconds
How to sabotage your high desire for sex
Are you the one in your marriage with the highest sex drive? Well…you might not be aware of some things you are doing to sabotage your high desire for sexual intimacy with your spouse. But do not be afraid, because today we have Dr. Corey Allan on the show to help those who have a[...]
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5/23/2017 • 32 minutes, 8 seconds
4 things every couple needs to know about sex
Today we are talking about sex, possibly one of the greatest gifts outside of eternal life God ever gave humankind! To help us with this conversation, Dave Willis of strongermarriages.com, is going to lend his expertise…and trust me, this guy has millions of readers, likes, and more. Coming up next we talk about the 4[...]
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5/16/2017 • 50 minutes, 13 seconds
Thoughtfulness leads to sexiness
A young 19 yr old in the Philippines gets what it takes to truly romanticize a woman! He bought her a McDonald’s Chicken Nugget bouquet for Valentine’s Day…how do nasty chicken nuggets equal romance you ask? Well it’s not what you buy that matters gentleman, it’s why you buy it! Coming up next on SMR[...]
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5/9/2017 • 35 minutes, 49 seconds
Dang – it is true – happy wife happy life
I’ve never liked the phrase, “Happy wife, happy life.” It’s offensive to my modern sense of relationships and the roles men and women play when it comes to having a healthy marriage. But apparently I was wrong to hate this! Research findings are starting to prove this antiquated statement, which I guess now make me[...]
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5/2/2017 • 37 minutes, 12 seconds
How the commands of Christ can transform your relationship
Something happened to me a few years ago that really shocked me. One of my dad’s best friends asked me if I loved Jesus. Really? Of course I do…but then he asked me a question that has forever changed my heart and understanding of what it truly means to love Christ. If you are wanting[...]
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4/25/2017 • 33 minutes, 30 seconds
Why our spouse drives us mad
For today’s show, we are going to take you deeper than ever before...all the way back to your childhood. Because the reason your spouse might drive you mad is quite simple. Philosopher Alain de Botton wrote in his book The Course of Love
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4/18/2017 • 27 minutes, 45 seconds
Let it go already
I’ve got a confession to make. For the majority of my marriage I have done something that has actively hurt my relationship. Only in the last few years that I finally realized the damage I was doing and made an important change to stop the hurt...
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4/11/2017 • 32 minutes, 44 seconds
The most damaging thing you can think
Today’s show is going to get a little aggressive, because frankly, I’m sick and tired of hearing this phrase. To all the clients and couples I’ve heard say this phrase, I love you and care deeply about your relationship…but this phrase has to stop because it is killing your chances of healing and restoration. If[...]
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4/4/2017 • 51 minutes, 18 seconds
Make a list and check it over and over again
Do you have any idea what to do when you are the most hurt or irritated with your spouse? Whatever you were first thinking is probably not the right response, which is why we do this show! Today we’re going to help you discover exactly what to do, and we even have an app to[...]
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3/28/2017 • 34 minutes, 7 seconds
Diagnosing your spouse
Have you ever wondered or even researched online possible personality or mood disorders your spouse might have? Then this is the show for you. We are going to give you everything you need to diagnose your spouse in this one show. If you are wanting immediate help with your relationship, please check out our online[...]
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3/21/2017 • 37 minutes, 1 second
20 questions you have to ask each other
Recently I came across an article that initially freaked me out. But as I continued to read it, a different kind of understanding began. Dr. Randi Gunther wrote, “Couples who rely too much on heightening their successes and ignoring their inherent dissatisfactions may end up facing a different problem.” What that problem is and the[...]
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3/14/2017 • 32 minutes, 6 seconds
Building intimacy with your man
Hello ladies! At SMR we know what you truly want with your man…intimacy. But sometimes experiencing meaningful intimacy with your man can feel a lot like Rocky trying to catch the chicken during one of his epic training sequences. Today, you’re gonna catch that chicken (I mean Intimacy) with your man! If you are wanting[...]
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3/7/2017 • 40 minutes, 51 seconds
Maybe going to church does help
Ever been to a really boring sermon? You know the kind, where your head keeps bobbing back and forth, your eyelids feel like they weigh a thousand pounds, and you can’t wait for the service to end…well keep it up because “couples who attend religious services are about 30-50 percent less like to divorce than[...]
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2/28/2017 • 26 minutes, 55 seconds
Interview with John Gray – Mars and Venus revisited
Today we have a special guest, that you probably heard of. John Gray is the best-selling author of Men are from Mars and Women are from Venus, but that might not even be the coolest part of his bio…he was also a monk for years and grew up around 5 brothers. Today we talk about[...]
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2/27/2017 • 2 hours, 45 minutes, 26 seconds
He makes me so mad and other lies
If you have ever said, “He makes me so…” Then have we got a show for you! Because there’s something wrong with this statement ladies, and you’d better hear what it is coming up next. If you are wanting immediate help with your relationship, please check out our online library of marriage and parenting courses![...]
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2/21/2017 • 40 minutes
What I hate about Valentine’s Day
So I googled something today that I’m not proud of…the search term was “what I hate about Valentine’s Day”. Got 1.25 million results. But there’s something I have to get off my chest about Valentine’s Day, because I really do hate it. And here’s some lovely quotes from others who feel the same: “If you’re[...]
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2/14/2017 • 29 minutes, 7 seconds
Positive parenting people need to calm down
This semi recent craze of Positive Parenting people are really starting to annoy me. Now to be fair, there are definitely some good things with this system of parenting, but come on people, it’s not the be all and end all to great parenting. Frankly, this show is going to try and bring a little[...]
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2/7/2017 • 43 minutes, 19 seconds
Let hope and optimism change you
How would you like to increase your ability to think better, tell the future, evaluate more effectively, solve your greatest problems, and just make better decision in life? Then all you need is a little dash of hope and a sprinkle of optimism. Sorry I made that sound so weak, because honestly, it might be[...]
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1/31/2017 • 33 minutes, 12 seconds
The sexy marriage progress report
Most of the time I hate it when people try to compare marriage to a business or even worse…the military! But unfortunately, I came across a business article that got me thinking about your relationship, and how you would really benefit from doing this business thing in your marriage…of course, with a few alterations to[...]
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1/24/2017 • 39 minutes, 10 seconds
Arguing about money
Today we are going to talk about money. I’m sure none of you have ever experienced conflict over money. So this show is probably a waste of your time…which is why we found some pretty profound quotes about money to make sure you stick around and listen: “Money can’t buy love but it can buy[...]
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1/17/2017 • 35 minutes, 50 seconds
Healing in the midst of being wounded daily
One of you submitted a question we couldn’t ignore because there was a lot of misunderstanding about forgiveness, repentance, Christians, and the church. This got us thinking that there may be many of our listeners who might struggle with understanding forgiveness and how it relates to someone who keeps on putting a knife in your[...]
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1/10/2017 • 37 minutes, 14 seconds
Redemption isn’t a myth part three
Here we go with part three of Peter and Holly’s story of redemption! Redemption isn’t a myth is the title of their story, but it doesn’t quite do it justice. Peter and Holly were married, then an affair, then divorce, then a second marriage (by Peter), then another divorce, then finally redemption for Peter and Holly. We[...]
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1/3/2017 • 1 hour, 48 minutes, 1 second
Redemption is not a myth part two
Here we go with part two of Peter and Holly’s story of redemption! Redemption isn’t a myth is the title of their story, but it doesn’t quite do it justice. Peter and Holly were married, then an affair, then divorce, then a second marriage (by Peter), then another divorce, then finally redemption for Peter and Holly.[...]
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12/27/2016 • 33 minutes, 20 seconds
Redemption is not a myth
Here we go with another amazing story from one of our listeners! Redemption isn’t a myth is the title of their story, but it doesn’t quite do it justice. Peter and Holly were married, then an affair, then divorce, then a second marriage (by Peter), then another divorce, then finally redemption for Peter and Holly.[...]
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