We love to read and watch stories about people who suffer, and still prevail. So why do we often become indignant at having to suffer ourselves? It’s a question worth pondering in this edition of Doing What Works.Here are your show notes…Whimsy is the nagging sensation life could be magical if we were willing to take a few risks.A hero, by definition, suffers.Uncertain waits seem longer than known, finite waits.Easy choices, hard life. Hard choices, easy life.“Language is a spectacularly rudimentary way of trying to communicate what is happening inside, and I think for a lot of us what happens inside is something we’ll never fully be able to put into words.” ~ That’s our very own Katie Anderson!“Failure’s like a muscle. You have to keep it strong. You need to have small failures constantly to keep you in shape for the big ol’ whopper that comes along once in a while.” ~ Sally HogsheadA hack from Dan Harris on making workouts suck a little bit less.

Tell yourself you’re going to have fun and learn a lot, almost no matter what the experience, and guess what? You likely will. That’s the case we make in this edition of Doing What Works.Here are your show notes…When someone shows you who they are, believe them the first time.Jerry Seinfeld is in the business of funny.Whimsy is the nagging sensation life could be magical if we were willing to take a few risks.Find something to be surprised by every day.Do you see the field?

There’s more to life than speeding it up. So much more! And in this edition of Doing What Works we’ll give you a list of inaction items.Here are your show notes…Humanity isn’t a hack.Silence is the only true religion.Erma Bombeck wrote a lot of clipworthy columns.

Katie never hits the snooze button. Ever. It’s one of her rules of thumb, and in this edition of Doing What Works we’ll share some of our other favorites.Here are your show notes…What, exactly, is a rule of thumb?“An embarrassment to paychecks” is from The Family Man.“Choose the bigger life” is from Gretchen Rubin.Easy choices, hard life. Hard choices, easy life.

Sometimes the way to help people feel better is to encourage them to feel even worse. For a while, at least. They can’t process their sadness, after all, without being sad. This encore edition of Doing What Works is one of our favorites, because we don’t pretend it’s easy -- but we do show our work. Here are your show notes… Staying the Course: A Runner’s Toughest Race taught me what it means to be a writer. Donna Mills says aging is not for sissies! Phil Stutz says he doesn’t think about his Parkinson’s so much as all the work he still wants to do.

Katie and I fancy ourselves the enlightened sort, who only occasionally let our egos get in the way of doing the right thing. When really, those egos get in the way constantly. Now what? Katie thinks I did a great job of answering that question in this encore edition of Doing What Works, but we’ll let you be the judge! Here are your show notes… We contain multitudes. The only thing we have to fear is fear itself. The capacity for joy directly related to capacity for pain.

Does telling yourself you live a charmed life work? Does feeling lucky bring on more of that? Katie doesn’t think it’s useful metric, and in this edition of Doing What Works she explains why.Here are your show notes…We got the idea for a show about luck from George Mack.There’s a podcast about Billy Joel’s “We Didn’t Start the Fire.”A What Color Is Your Parachute? workshop was a class on making a life transition.The Law of Attraction was the basis for The Secret.Is the Universe hostile or friendly? Albert Einstein thought that’s the most important question.Jordan Ellenberg is the author of How Not to Be Wrong.Thomas Jefferson is quoted as saying the harder he works, the luckier he gets.Earl Nightingale is quoted as saying luck is what happens when preparedness meets opportunity. Alex Lickerman talks about indestructible happiness in his book, The Undefeated Mind.

Sometimes it isn’t our job to be the star. Sometimes we’re in a supporting role, and in this edition of Doing What Works we’ll be your cheerleader as you learn how to…be a good cheerleader.Here are your show notes…“The bad stuff is easier to believe.”If you read What Color Is Your Parachute? you’ll learn that, for example, resumes are mostly used to screen you out.Barbara Sher was never a fan of self-help books or motivational speeches. Better, she said, to identify your obstacles as specifically as you can -- and find people to help you scale those hurdles.

Someone tries to shame Katie and me for stepping over her aisle seat in a movie theater to use the bathroom before the previews start. Someone else tries to shame Darrell after he checked for spare change from a coin-cashing machine. It didn’t work in either case, and in this edition of Doing What Works we tell you why we risked those confrontations. We also share many more times we let something go.Here are your show notes…The Good Place examines what it means to be a good person.A commencement address by David Foster Wallace will help you have compassion for strangers.

Don’t hit the snooze button. Do make the bed. Don’t put off the laundry. Little things? Hardly! They help you build momentum. They help turn you into a person who accepts what she can’t change -- like a date that won’t end in marriage -- and enjoys a lovely evening with someone who might become a good friend. The spotlight’s on little glimmers in this edition of Doing What Works.Here are your show notes…“Everyone is a storyteller dying for lack of an audience.” That’s Dick Bolles.“If the world was about to end, I’d take notes.” That’s from Sara Davidson. I think!Intermittent fasting is popular in blue zones.Beware of the sunk cost fallacy.

Having a difficult conversation doesn’t guarantee a solution to your problem, but you can put it in the win column if it relieves some pressure. We’ll deconstruct three different kinds of difficult conversations in this edition of Doing What Works in hopes your next one goes a little easier.Here are your show notes…Is it a problem or a situation?“Constant chatter is an attempt at control.” That’s from Dick Bolles.“People are afraid that silence will make them sound stupid,” Taylor Mali says, “So they fill it with something that’s guaranteed to make them sound stupid.”

Your devices are like the air you breathe. It’s easy to take them for granted. Until something goes wrong! We’ll be your tech support in this edition of Doing What Works.Here are your show notes…There’s a TV show about tech! The IT Crowd.A Casio watch won’t get you a hotel room.The Serenity Prayer might help you weather the latest technical problems.

As a cub reporter for a small radio station, I wanted to interview Bobby Knight when he was head coach of the Indiana Hoosiers. He not only agreed, but changed my idea of what’s possible. Katie drew me out about the experience in this edition of Doing What Works.Here are your show notes…A Season on the Brink chronicles the 1985-86 season of the Hoosiers.Vince Staten, Maureen’s favorite professor, says you can make things happen with a good letter.The waiting is the hardest part!Recess is supposedly a show for kids that Katie promises grownups will enjoy, too.Harvey Mackay suggests you not say no for the other guy.“You must ask for what you really want.” That’s from the Rumi poem, “A Great Wagon.”The Career Clinic: Eight Simple Rules for Finding Work You Love has interviews with humorist Dave Barry and the late editor of Cosmopolitan, Helen Gurley Brown.

Katie’s face is her canvas. In this edition of Doing What Works she talks about how it started, why she isn’t a makeup artist by trade, and how it gives her practice accepting compliments. Even before she added rhinestones to the mix, Katie’s look has been a playground for increasing self-confidence.Here are your show notes…Katie’s makeup is a study in positive externality.

Come on. We dare you. Get through a conversation -- heck, get through a paragraph of conversation -- without using an idiom. In this edition of Doing What Works you’ll not only learn the origin of some of your most-fallen-back-on expressions but might just be inspired to up your game (oops!) conversationally.Here are your show notes…An idiom is a phrase you can’t decipher the meaning of from its individual words, and if overused becomes a cliché.Here are some idioms and their meanings.Here are some more idioms and their meanings.Helen Gurley Brown wrote a book of advice for writers.Name drop alert! Darrell and Katie and I were in the audience of the 2010 National Poetry Slam where Shane Hawley delivered this masterpiece.“I bury hatchets but I keep maps of where I put ’em” is from Taylor Swift. (You didn’t think we could get through a show without quoting her, did you?)

The same routine can keep you from having to make the same decisions, but the same routine can also mean you’re in a rut. The examples we cite in this edition of Doing What Works might make you laugh in recognition as you clutter bust your daily grind.Here are your show notes…Dr. Nick Morgan advises public speakers to invite people in the audience to move to the front: “The energy in the room will change.”Have you heard the one about the motivational speaker Jack Canfield and the yellow notebook? Jerry Seinfeld says older men dress in the style of the last good year of their lives.

“We’ll figure it out” is our family motto. That’s one reason Katie and I consider ourselves adaptable, because we take that motto so much to heart. In this edition of Doing What Works we hope to inspire a belief that the best is yet to be.Here are your show notes…Have you heard of wu wei?The harder you work, the luckier you get.Mel Robbins suggests you ask yourself, “What if it all works out?”Former marathon champion Dick Beardsley says he still wishes for a different outcome to the 1982 Boston Marathon when he sees video from that race.“When you pick a lost cause, you really commit” is from Robots.

The big city. The bike. The journal and the tablet. These are a few of Katie’s favorite things, and in this edition of Doing What Works she so eloquently describes why she loves them I couldn’t help but be inspired. I think you will be, too!Here are your show notes…In Good Company inspired Katie’s desire to go to college in New York City.New York City’s Summer Streets inspired Katie to start biking.Like Katie, Tim Urban draws stick figures.The Far Side’s Gary Larson started drawing comics again when he got a digital tablet.

Things that hold other things, and a store that sells them. A store that sells those things but also groceries! Tiny things. And drawing people out about all the things. You can learn a lot about what you value by examining what you love, the way Katie helped me do in this edition of Doing What Works.Here are your show notes…Marie Kondo suggests you keep only what’s beautiful or useful.The Container Store is my favorite!Sarah Susanka is a fan of better, not bigger, spaces.Barbara Sher said horses run because they love it, and suggested you do things for the same reason.

I felt really bad when Aaron Rodgers tore his Achilles tendon four plays into the 2023 season, and then I felt bad about that. It isn’t as if I know him personally, after all. That was the week Katie pulled further ahead of me in our Wordle competition than she had in months, and I took the setback with all the composure of a five-year-old. We’ll tell you what’s going on in this edition of Doing What Works.Here are your show notes… Testosterone levels rise in fans of winning teams.Have you seen the video of a little kid imitating his father while they’re watching a football game? What does Taylor Swift have in common with the NFL? Her economic impact is not inconsequential, that’s what!Do you behave as if everything is a miracle, or nothing is?Enthusiasm is a form of social courage.

A sneaky sad part of life is returning somewhere that was once important to you, then realizing it isn’t the same because you’re not the same. When Katie shared that observation in this edition of Doing What Works I was sad. At first. Then she taught me a new word, palimpsest, applied it to geography -- and inspired me to be more intentional about how I file my memories.Here are your show notes…George Carlin says an artist has an obligation to be en route.A palimpsest is “a manuscript page, either from a scroll or a book, from which the text has been scraped or washed off in preparation for reuse, in the form of another document.”

Sometimes the way to help people feel better is to encourage them to feel even worse. For a while, at least. They can’t process their sadness, after all, without being sad. This edition of Doing What Works is one of our favorites, because we don’t pretend it’s easy -- but we do show our work. Here are your show notes… Staying the Course: A Runner’s Toughest Race taught me what it means to be a writer. Donna Mills says aging is not for sissies! Phil Stutz says he doesn’t think about his Parkinson’s so much as all the work he still wants to do.

If you find it difficult to ask for help, we can help. In this edition of Doing What Works we remind you how good it feels to be needed, and invite you to extend that opportunity to others. Here are your show notes… That feeling when a friend tells you you’re worthy of immediate attention. The most important metric to track is personal energy. In Blue Like Jazz, Donald Miller explores the idea of unearned grace.

The kind of week you have might depend on whether you ask yourself what you’re dreading, or what you’re looking forward to. This edition of Doing What Works is an invitation to change your mind(set). Here are your show notes… Dr. Daniel Amen suggests you challenge ants. No, not those. These! Automatic negative thoughts. The Untethered Soul’s Michael Singer says the voice inside your head is like an obnoxious roommate who will not shut up. Lollipop moments create ripples forever. Donald Miller’s Blue Like Jazz, a book I read on Katie’s recommendation, is a winner. Promise!

Someone stumbles on a word and you jump in with a correction. Are you being helpful or obnoxious? In this edition of Doing What Works we examine boo-boos like “Pacific” when it’s “specific,” and whether corrections are kind or cruel. We also make a case against pointing out an unzipped zipper -- and how, while youth isn’t necessarily wasted on the young, feedback might be! Here are your show notes… “Casually cruel in the name of being honest” is a Taylor Swift lyric.

What do oranges, façades, butterflies, and dolls have in common? You’ll find out if you listen to this edition of Doing What Works. But bring your childlike self, because this is an experiment in random (with a dollop of whimsy).Here are your show notes…What are tapas?What’s the squiggle under the C in façade?What’s the precise definition of façade?We all have a face that we hide away forever.Would you like to see a periwinkle card from Papyrus that features a butterfly?Would you like to hear one of Maureen’s favorite Tom Petty songs?Have you seen Barbie?

Your next job. Your relationship. The apartment you want. Even if it doesn’t bother you to be vague about those plans or circumstances, the people in your orbit might pressure you to label them. Now what? That’s what we tackle in this edition of Doing What Works. Wish us luck!Here are your show notes…Casting director Jane Brody trusts her first impression at least in part because that’s how the audience decides whether to pay attention.Katie was in Business Professionals of America in high school.

Katie and I fancy ourselves the enlightened sort, who only occasionally let our egos get in the way of doing the right thing. When really, those egos get in the way constantly. Now what? Katie thinks I did a great job of answering that question in this edition of Doing What Works, but we’ll let you be the judge!Here are your show notes…We contain multitudes.The only thing we have to fear is fear itself.The capacity for joy directly related to capacity for pain.

You don’t know what’s going to make you happy until you try it. The job or the relationship that looks good on paper may not feel so great at, say, ten o’clock on a Tuesday. That’s one reason to say yes to more things, so you can get a better feel for more things. Saying yes is a habit and a mindset. If you practice saying yes to smaller things with low stakes, you might find yourself more willing to take bigger risks. That’s what we hope to inspire in this edition of Doing What Works. Here are your show notes…Irresistible author Adam Alter [http://adamalterauthor.com/] was one of Katie’s professors at NYU Stern and “say yes” was his advice.“I wish I might go back and do the little things you asked me to” is from a poem by Alice E. Chase [https://www.scrapbook.com/poems/doc/860.html] entitled “To My Grown-Up Son.”Saying “yes” (and “yes, and”) is a rule of improv [https://medium.com/the-improv-blog/the-first-rule-of-improv-is-yes-and-30e5954240d6].“If you can’t imagine any other explanation for a set of facts, it might be because you are bad at imagining things.” That’s from Dilbert creator Scott Adams [https://twitter.com/ScottAdamsSays].“Marriage is a big bet. It’s the only bet of its kind, one in which you say, ‘This feels right; I think I’ll change everything.’” That’s from Jerry Seinfeld [https://www.today.com/popculture/seinfeld-turns-25-read-jerrys-best-real-life-lines-1D79884423].