You guys...this one's a doozie. This week, I went down the rabbit hole and I watched/listened to ALL 50 Videos from Reesa M Teesa on TikTok called Who TF Did I Marry?  And woah...this one is a wild ride. I will be spoiling it all over the place, but today I talk about: *What this series is about and what happened *What we can learn from this story *How we can watch out for people who are manipulators and aren't really ready for a relationship *Three things we can do that to prevent something like this happening to us. Want to dig in deeper? Check out my new How to Spot People Who Are Not Ready for A Relationship Workshop A 2 hour DIY video workshop for $39. Get all of the info here. SUSCRIBE, LEAVE A REVIEW & SHARE EVERYWHERE! Like this? Take a workshop, do an intensive, & change your life! Questions? Email the show at kira@reinventingdating.com Instagram: @kirasabin Facebook: @reinventingdating TikTok: @reinventingdatingpod    

Get bonus episodes, a private podcast community, access to Kira, & submit Q and A questions when you SUBSCRIBE to the RD Podcast Membership.  Sign-up at learn.reinventingdating.com We are at the fourth episode of a NEW Season on the podcast called "Common Dating Questions through a Modern & Healthy Perspective." Today I'm breaking down: What is chivalry & where did the idea come from? What is chivalry that we believe in nowadays & is it working for us? The different origins of many of modern chivalry beliefs What we make chivalry mean that can be unhelpful What Reinvented Chivalry looks like 12 Modern Chivalry Acts for all of us to think about Article I referenced: Tik Tok Video  Coverture Chivalry History This is Gendered Chivalry Definition Fashion History Roofied Stats SUSCRIBE, LEAVE A REVIEW & SHARE EVERYWHERE! Like this? Take a workshop, do an intensive, & change your life! Follow Kira & the show on Instagram: @kirasabin Questions? Email the show at kira@reinventingdating.com Instagram: @kirasabin Facebook: @reinventingdating TikTok: @reinventingdating

Listen up as I share my own story of fear, sabotage, family, death, & love.  Ready to get over your shit for love? ReinventingDating.com

Listen up as I share my own story of fear, sabotage, family, death, & love.  Ready to get over your shit for love? ReinventingDating.com

Is love even worth it anymore? Hell yeah, it is. But dating pretty much sucks. Even on its best day, dating is vulnerable, stressful, exhausting, confusing. Everything's changed! Who pays? Who asks who out? Am I sharing too much, too little?  ARGH! So here's some good news. The great news is that in the past 30, 40, even 50 years, there have been tons of scientists, psychologists, who have dedicated their life to understanding love & relationships and how they work. But the thing is is that most people don't know this information. But I do and I'm going to teach it to you. I'm going to teach you the mindsets, the skills, all the things that make or break relationships and dating, that we never learned.  I'm going to help you get there.  Welcome to Reinventing Dating. 

  Join me for a No-pitch Coffee Chat! Cruise Link Article I reference

And I even sang you a song.  

Sliding in for a single podcast with an announcement and some genius.  Listen up!

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I did somthing new...tell me what you think!

I have thoughts...listen up!    

Important Podcast.  Please Listen. Leave a tip or check-out the 🔥 sale here.

Listen up! Workshop comes out tomorrow  at 4 pm! Get it delivered to your inbox by going to WhatisLoveWorkshop.com

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You might be surprised.  Ready to build your Dating & Relationship Blueprint?  Click here for all the details. https://myrq.link/blueprint

Time for another Rom-Com Breakdown!  This week is Just Wright - with Queen Latifah & Common.  You can watch it for free on youtube. 

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Part 2 of the 50 truths!  Listen up.    

I'm 50!  So I wanted to update one of my favorite (and fan favorite) podcasts from a few years ago. Listen up!

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Listen up Article I referenced

Did you say you need a Date Doctor? I'm bringing back something awesome from a few years ago...Ruining Rom-Coms!  Where the very awesome Loha Raphael joined me for a few episodes to watch and breakdown famous rom-coms. Today, we are breaking down the 2005 Rom-Com Hitch, with Will Smith and Eva Mendes.   Will teaching insecure men how to manipulate women that they have an obsessive crush lead to love?  Oh shit! do we have thoughts...

With awesome guest, Veronica Grant! Check out everything you want to know about Veronica here.

Listen up!    Come to Tulum!

Listen up and join me in Tulum!!!!

Grab one of the last spots to Tulum!

Maybe? Maybe not Tulum!

Instagram post I reference. Infographic from today.

Listen up! Join me in Tulum!

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Listen up! Article I used for this episode.

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It's my 300th episode!!! 

You're probably not going to like it. 😂 Listen up!

Let's clear the BS and get real about this.

I took an old article of mine and walked through it.  I think you will enjoy the result.  Listen up.

This is bleak but good information to have. Article referenced in the podcast. Listen up.  

Last day to get in Reinventing Dating!

Listen up! Reinventing Dating starts in a few days!

Lots to tell. Are you joining me this Sunday?  Learn more here.

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Listen up.

A personal story. Listen up.

Listen-up!

Listen up!

Listen up!

Listen up!

Want to work with me?  Or go on a retreat?  Check it out here.

Join me in Reinventing Dating with an early bird price through tonight!

Reinventing Dating is back!  Get the early bird discount through the weekend here!

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Listen up.

Listen up!

I have thoughts.

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Listen up!

Do we?  I have LOTS of thoughts.

Listen up. 

LAST DAY TO GET IN REINVENTING DATING! I'm coming in hot with a bonus episode and breaking down: *A personal story of unconscious beliefs & the reactions that happened because of them *How this can show up in your dating *Why this happens *What we can do about it Listen up!  

New podcast is up & last chance to join Reinventing Dating! Today I breakdown: My 3 am deep dive into Buzzfeed Articles & what I learned Stories of Honest Romance from the article Stories of Biggest Regrets about Divorce What you can learn from all of it. Listen up!    

I made you an audiobook this week, you can download it here. Reinventing Dating is back to the early bird price of $199 a month or $999 and still has openings.  Learn more here.  

New podcast is up and it is so juicy with good info that this a two parter! If you missed part one, listen here. Self-sabotaging in relationships involves engaging in behaviors, either consciously or unconsciously, that lead to the end of a relationship. This might involve pushing the other person away or finding reasons to get out of the relationship. Such behavior often stems from trust issues, past experiences, and poor relationship skills. Every single day I see singles sabotaging their dates or potential relationships without even knowing!  So I created a list of 10 Anti-Sabotage Guidelines to make sure you are not unconsciously sabotaging yourself and keeping you away from love. I even made you this PDF to download so you don't forget them! Download it here. Today I breakdown 6-9 and they are GOOD!  And don't forget to grab a spot for my new program for ALL singles (men & women) at ReinventingDating.com

New podcast is up and it is so juicy with good info there is going to be a part 2 next week! Self-sabotaging in relationships involves engaging in behaviors, either consciously or unconsciously, that lead to the end of a relationship. This might involve pushing the other person away or finding reasons to get out of the relationship. Such behavior often stems from trust issues, past experiences, and poor relationship skills. Every single day I see singles sabotaging their dates or potential relationships without even knowing!  So I created a list of 10 Anti-Sabotage Guidelines to make sure you are not unconsciously sabotaging yourself and keeping you away from love. Today I breakdown 1-5 and they are GOOD! ANd don't forget to get on the waitlist for my new program for ALL singles (men & women) at ReinventingDating.com

Today on the podcast I am breaking down: More details about the brand spankin' new Reinventing Dating!  A revolutionary new program for ALL singles to get clear on what they personally need, understand modern relationships, and learn the skills & mindsets needed for happy, healthy unshakeable love. A great reminder and advice from a story in the Relationship Quotient community A super simple self-assessment you can do to see if you are ready to get out there and start dating! Listen up! Big things are coming so you definitely want to head over to ReinventingDating.com to get on the waitlist!

I talk a lot about partnerships but did you know that they are different than relationships? They are!  And I have some good thoughts about it. ​​​ In this episode I breakdown: 🌟The 7 ways to tell the difference between relationships & partnerships. 🌟Why most of us are are looking for partnerships but are having relationships and situationships. 🌟How I personally had to show up differently to build a partnership in my marriage. Articles referenced: ​ Elite Daily article Last First Date Article​ ​​​​Listen up!

Can people trust you and are you comfortable trusting them?  If not, you may not being feeling emotionally safe in your friendships & relationships. In this episode I breakdown: Ways I was personally emotionally unsafe in my life What it means to be and feel emotionally safe Why it's so important for good relationships Seven signs to spot that someone is emotionally safe. Don't forget to subscribe!  

Well I'm back with a personal story this week...and not just any personal story, but one of my most painful, honest, and life-changing moments in my life. So gather 'round to hear my story of denial, trolls, liars, pain, healing, and deep love. If you are ready to work on yourself before your "moment of truth" check out all the cool stuff we are doing here.

Recently an article came out on Psychology Today about the rise of  Lonely, Single Men that everyone was talking about and I wanted to break down. Today I talk about: Cool new changes in the Owner's Manual A new article on Psychology today about the loneliness of men What are some of the factors that are creating that loneliness What women can do to meet them halfway An announcement for men to help Listen up on your favorite platform!

Today I am bringing back an oldie but a goodie.  In 2017, only a couple of years after our relationship started, Danny joined me on the podcast to talk about the night we met and the beginning of dating. It's a good one. Listen up!

This week I am talking about how to know if you are just unlucky in love.  This episode has quite a bit of tough love...   Why you might think you are unlucky in love   A lot of swearing & awkward singing   A lot of tough love genius   Three things you can look at to change your luck in love  

I'm back with a new podcast and I'm sharing a personal brain hack that I use DAILY! Listen up today as I break down: An announcement about Costa Rica Retreat (wheeeeeee) What I'm absolutely loving right now. Meet binaural beats! my favorite simple way to hack your brain. Subscribe!!

Join me with the LB Discount in the OM Spring Cohort starting the 22 at BuildYourOM.com Welcome to Love Breakthrough Podcast Event Day 4! 4 podcasts in 4 days answering your toughest questions about love, dating, & relationships. 1. How do I deprogram from societal relationship conditioning and know what I truly want and need in relationship? 2.  My question is, how do I gain confidence after not dating for about 5 years?   3.  How do you get excited about dating again when you have tried so much to no avail and find it hard to even believe you can find a match again? Get more info and shownotes from the podcast here. 

Hello and Welcome to Love Breakthrough Podcast Event Day 3! 4 podcasts in 4 days answering your toughest questions about love, dating, & relationships. 1. Why do I keep attracting emotionally unavailable men?  2. Can you build a healthy relationship with anyone? 3.  How do you feel lovable again after someone has made you feel unlovable? 4. What are your thoughts on polyamory? Get more info and shownotes from the podcast here.

Hello and Welcome to Love Breakthrough Podcast Event Day 2! 4 podcasts in 4 days answering your toughest questions about love, dating, & relationships. Today I am answering the questions: 1. Should you go back to your ex? 2. Do certain personality types find it much harder to find love? 3. How do you not take rejection personally or accept the fact that if they wanted to be with you they would? Get more info and shownotes from the podcast here.

Welcome to the Love Breakthrough!  Join me for 4 podcasts in 4 days answering all of your toughest love, dating, & relationship questions. Day 1 Questions Answered: • Am I not interested or am I avoidant? • How do I detach from someone not ready for a relationship with me? • When is it too soon for sex? • When is a good time to bring up exes when you’re dating someone new? Come check out more details and show notes here.

I am bringing back a great episode from 2019 to help get through the next few weeks.  See you with the all new RQ podcast in the new year! Listen up!

Watch the video first, here. Take my quiz!

Check out the photos and videos here.

Listen up! And if you are ready for some mind-blowing love AND Salted Caramel Pretzel Brownies, come join me at BuildYourOM.com

Join me in the OM!  BuildyourOM.com    

Join me for the Having Needs vs Being Needy Workshop on Sunday!  Get your ticket for $37 here.

Join me for the How to Spot Someone NOT ready for a relationship Workshop!  Get your seat for $37 here!

Join me in Mexico   swfyretreat.com

a very personal story about satin jackets, camp, middle school bullies, family trauma, and what I learned. Listen up!

Join me in Mexico!  Only $366 until Sunday!  Go here to learn more!

Listen up! Email me at sabin.kira@gmail.com if you want to go to Mexico with me in November!!    

It's my 200th episode AND my 48th birthday this week so I am bringing you the all the things! I took all 13 years of knowledge about love, dating, and relationships and rolled it up into 48 truths that everyone should know about love.   Let me know which one's stood out to you! 

Listen up!  And join me on Instagram! 

Listen up! Come follow me on insta!

Two spots left for the OM! BuildyourOM.com

Listen up! Buildyourom.com

Grab your seat for Love Reset for $29!

Join me for Love Reset here! And don't forget to check out Ruining Rom-coms!  

Join me for Love Reset here! And don't forget to check out Ruining Rom-coms!  

Listen up to my new podcast!  And make sure you subscribe on apple podcasts at Ruining Rom-Coms! Follow us on instagram!

Don't forget to check out Ruining Rom-coms Podcast launching on Valentine's Day! Follow us on instagram. Have you seen the new documentary Framing Britney Spears? I watched it on Sunday and have been reeling ever since. I wanted to share my personal thoughts on it and ask...how can we do better?

Join me over at Ruining RomComs on Insta to get in the know!

Join me! buildyourOM.com

Come join me in the OM at BuildyourOM.com  

Listen up!  

Good Thinking Traps Article  

Listen up! Join us in the discussion at loas.co/fbgroup

Welcome to the Love Reset Podcast Event.   Download the weekly schedule here Awesome article on fixed vs growth mindset  

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Listen up!

The Body Keeps the Score Top Questions to ask a therapist: How long have you been practicing? What licenses and certifications do you have and which professional organizations do you belong to? How much do you charge? What are you sliding-scale options? How many clients have you had with similar circumstances to my own? When was the last time you worked with someone similar to me? Describe your ideal patient. How often would you anticipate seeing me? For how long? How do you set up counseling goals? What are they like? What is success for you? What is typical session like? How long are the sessions? What kind of homework/reading do you give patients? What is your general philosophy and approach to helping? How do I prepare for my first session? Are you more directive or more guiding?  

Listen up!

loas.co/newom

Want to see the whole video?  Go here! Ready to change your life?  Join me here!

Listen up! loas.co/newom

Check out the new OM (and join me!) at loas.co/newom    

Hello Sugarpantses! I am doing something fun this week.  I am going to answer YOUR questions throughout the week.  So that means a few podcasts will be coming your way! If you want to submit a question to be answered, email me at sabin.kira@gmail.com! Kira

loas.co/newom -  Join me!  

loas.co/newom

loas.co/newom Listen up!

loas.co/newom Listen up!

Listen up!

loas.co/newom  use OMQUARANTINE for a 10% discount loas.co/book if you want to chat about the OM

Hell yeah there is.   Check out the new OM here.  loas.co/newom

loas.co/join

Join the Scavenger Hunt this weekend. loas.co/hunt My Masterclass - loas.co/join Books I recommend on the podcast: Daring Greatly by Brene Brown How of Happiness by Sonja Lyubomirsky Attached - Amir Levine and Rachel Heller Self Compassion Kristin Neff

Listen up! loas.co/join

Listen up! loas.co/join

Listen up! loas.co/join

Listen up! Check out the masterclass at loas.co/join

Listen up! And grab the masterclass at loas.co/join

Grab the new Masterclass at loas.co/join

Listen up! Join the list by texting loas to 33777 for your FREE Module!

listen up! loas.co/fbgroup

Listen up! loas.co/fbgroup

Join us to discuss in the LOAS free Facebook Group loas.co/fbgroup

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I'm super sweary and super salty today.  Listen up.

Listen up! Find the video I reference here.  https://vimeo.com/393253445  

Listen up! leagueofadventuroussingles.com

Listen up! Here are the articles I referenced in the podcast. https://www.wholelifechallenge.com/why-we-judge-and-how-to-turn-it-into-something-good/ http://thepositivitysolution.com/judging-others/ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/conscious-communication/201805/why-we-judge-others

loas.co/tellme Listen up! K

Listen up!   Kira

listen up loas.co/newom

Listen up! loas.co/newom

Listen up! Loas.co/newom

Listen up! Join me Dec 29th for a FREE Call at loas.co/why

Listen up! Check it out at loas.co/newom

Listen up!

Listen up!

Listen up!

Listen up! LoveResetEvent.com

Listen up!   LoveResetEvent.com

Listen up!

Listen up!

Listen up! And come join the discussion at loas.co/fbgroup

Listen up!

Listen up!

Listen up!

Listen up!

Listen up!

Listen up!

Yes, that is a reference to the Backstreet Boys song...:) Listen up!

Listen up!

Listen up!

listen up!

Listen up!

Listen up! loveresetevent.com

Listen up.

Listen up! LoveResetEvent.com

Listen up!

Listen up.   LoveResetEvent.com

Listen up! LoveResetEvent.com

Well..do they?  Can you?  Listen up.

Listen up!

Listen up and join me for the Tuesday Q & A FB Live in the LOAS FB group! loas.co/fbgroup

Sharing my story...listen up.

Listen up!

Listen up.

Listen up!

Listen up

Listen up.

This week, my friend and colleague Kristin Lohr from @wearesoulsparks joins me and asks me ALLLLLL of the questions that you want the answers to. About love, dating, Danny and my relationship and much, much more. Listen Up!

Breaking this down....

Do you ever worry you are too quiet? Too shy? Too boring to date? One of the new LOAS Accountability Coaches, Lisa Chartrand and I break down some of the introversion myths and how to date better as an introvert.   Listen up!

I have an awesome surprise for you today! This weekend I had a former client in town and she agreed to share her story of what she has learned and how she changed her life...and love life!   Listen Up!

Today I am getting real.   I am sharing a personal story about Danny and i to share how we work together and support each other when the times get tough. Listen up.  

In this episode, I will be ranting about the numbers game. You know I have a lot to say so listen up! "You can't holiday shop for a boyfriend." - Kira Sabin What you will hear from me on this episode: Launching the new Owner's Manual What will get from the new owner's manual The importance of having a coach Why live events are a must for an online community Kira will offer the owner's manual to men by 2021 Online Dating defined by Kira Disturbing data Kira found about online dating What is the number one predictor of a relationship's success The danger of playing the numbers game Quality over quantity dating Resources The Owner’s Manual Connect with Kira: Website Instagram Facebook Group

You probably are and don't even know it...but I am breaking some shit down for you. Listen up.  

Breaking it down for you...listen up!

This week is one part Queer Eye, one part genius. Listen Up.

This week I tell you about my love for TV and what I have realized watching some of my favorite shows...and it ain't good.   Listen up!

Going old school on this one.  Basic concepts.  Listen up.

Let's talk turkey. One of the things we think is empowering is when we see a friend hurting we start to blame others.  Men, women, unicorns...everyone. The thing is it isn't hurting them...it is hurting us. Listen up as I break it down.

Hey sugarpantses! It was my birthday this last weekend and I have some stories to tell about love languages, awkward videos, Denver, dancing, Ted Talks and unicorns. Listen up!

You have probably heard this quote by now and I definitely have some thoughts...

If you want to know the #1 pet peeve in my biz...just listen up.     

Cause we are. And it's bad out there.  But I have answers for you!  I got you! Listen up.

Loneliness has been officially declared an epidemic.  It's something that not only is affecting our health but also the way we date. Listen up to my thoughts on what loneliness is and how to change it.

They probably are and you don't even know it! But we are breaking that down today.  I have resurrected an old amazing interview with my friend Rob Mack and you are going to love it! Listen up.

Oh....I have thoughts.

Laying down some truth today.  Listen up.

So this week I am talking about cheating, but not from the moral aspect, but the relationship aspect. What can we learn from cheating and how do we do better.

'Cause it's the worst. This week I am talking about ghosting, bread crumbing, zombieing and even the new term mosting. All of them suck and we need to have a convo on what to do about it. Listen up!

I can't even. We are having a come to Jesus moment, so just listen up.

It seems that almost all the time when I ask people how they are, they tell me they are so busy.  Crazy busy.   But are we? And if we are, are we too busy for love? Today, I break down the whole busy trap that a lot of us are living in and how to figure out if we are too, or are dating people, too busy for love. Check out the NYT article here.

I love me some Parks and Rec and more than Leslie, Ben, Andy or Tom...I love me some Ron Swanson. And one of my favorite love lessons comes from a line in the final season that I decided to do a whole episode around. Listen up!

Recently in the OM Class, this awesome quote was brought up about compatibility and I wanted to break it down today on the podcast. Enjoy!

Do they? And if they don't, what do we do instead? Well I think you know that I am breaking that shit down for you today.  Listen up!

Let's take it back!

Oh shit.  I am bringing it today. There is a big pile of bullshit that I calling out today.  The idea that you haven't met the right one yet...because you probably have. I know...ouch.  Come on over and let me give you a hug because believing that myth is NOT helping you.  But I break down a new mindset today that will! And don't forget that the new Owner's Manual Class is starting on February 19th and you get it free if you sign-up to join me in Mexico.   Check out all of the info here.

In my research for the new Owner's Manual, I found this killer info about the stages of relationships and was not surprised to find out that most of us never get past stage one or two. Really. Listen up as I share this totally mind-blowing info and find out where you are getting stuck.    

I mean really. I can rant day after day about boundaries, vulnerability, communication, etc...but all of it means shit if we don't actually understand what love truly is. I am breaking down some new theories on love, so get ready to blow your mind wide open.  

LADIES! Man, is this week super special.  I recently had a good session with a brand new client and she offered for me to share it with all of you! So you are going to get a private peek into what a session and "doing the work" really looks like. During the excerpt we talk about: How love is only a single emotion Why falling in love isn't real How striving to be perfect keeps you further away from love  and so much more.   Listen up!

The New LOAS podcast is here! Today's guest, Andrea Owen, is talking about her new book "How to Stop Feeling Like Shit" and how to stop hiding out from love. Listen up!

Oh I am on a roll today! I have a question for you.  Are you making choices that will actually get you love AND a relationship? The short answer is probably not.  Most ladies aren't.   Listen up today as I share stories about choices and how you can choose to be in a relationship as well as love.

So over the last few podcasts I have been talking about ways that we are unavailable and probably don't even know it.   I see it all of the time.  A client will come to me telling me all she wants in the world is love and a relationship.  She has been waiting forever!   And that might be true. But when she meets someone or starts to date someone new she:  * bends over backwards  * is nervous to speak up for herself * doesn't ask for what she needs to feel good in the relationships *​​loses herself in the relationship Or maybe never even gets close to do those things! And without even knowing it...she is totally emotionally unavailable.  Don't worry, I got you.​​ Listen in today to the podcast as I share with you how to start getting more available.   And check out my new one day event in Chicago called CONNECT! Kira

I've got a story from a client this week...that was pissed off. Frustrated. Over it. Because she got ghosted...again. But here is the deal...she wasn't.   Listen up as I tell her story and make sure you prevent this from happening. Want to listen to my other podcasts on ghosting?  Check them out here and here.

If I were to ask you if you are emotionally available, what would you say? Most women I work with yell from the rooftops how available they are.  They think they could not be more available...they are dying to be in a relationship. But if there is something that I have learned in my 9+ years of doing this it is that some many women I work with "think" they are emotionally available and just plain aren't. Today on the podcast, I am breaking it down.  Listen up!  

I know I have, have you? When you meet someone and it just feels so, so right.  You can't help but just say "fuck it!  Let's do this!" Right? I have thoughts and stories and even some theories to share about whether or not you should just follow your heart...or not.

This week, I get personal again. I tie up the story about my Dad's passing and what it has to do with my relationship.   What I learned and how the stories about what your relationship is "supposed to" be like it total bullshit. Listen up.

Are they? Well some are.  But many are not.   However there may be a whole other piece at play that you are not even thinking about and today I break that down for you.    

Ready for one part honest stories +one part really smart stuff + one part ridiculous talk about 90s fashion? Done. Today, I have two of my favorite people on earth on my podcast.  Amy Smith from thejoyjunkie.com and Andrea Owen from yourkickasslife.com.  We got together for this awesome interview to talk about our own struggles, share some funny stories and talk all things 90s.  We also talk about the amazing retreat we having coming up in October that you don't want to miss!  Check it out at tripletconference.com I also mentioned that one of my favorite (and single) guys might be joining us at the conference for a little bit.  Have you met my friend Rob Mack?  He is pretty awesome. He also looks like this..yeah that sucks.   Listen up, enjoy the ride and join me in California in October!  

What do you think? You know I have thoughts on it... Listen up as I break down my thoughts about men, love, dating, relationships...all of it!   And join the challenge that starts on July 24th at loas.co/5

It gets confusing nowadays... You look around at everyone you know and you might be asking yourself...do I even want a relationship?  No one who is in one seems that happy... I get it. Today I am going to talk about why you DO want a relationship and how to get there.  

This is the worst. Seriously.  It is so tough when the well-meaning family, friends, co-workers and even dates ask this question!  Let alone when they love to weigh in on what you should do! Today we are going to talk about mindsets and scripts about how to handle this and not lose your shit.  

I have a guest on the podcast this week and it is pretty much my favorite guest ever...my boyfriend Danny!!!! He is on the podcast to talk about the ridiculous night we met, the beginning of our relationship and what we did wrong and right! It's a good one.  Listen up!

I am sharing my guts all over the place this episode.     About how I felt about my birthday this week. Not so great things that happened in Costa Rica. Personal failures. All of it. All for the sake of learning.  Listen up!

So this is a tricky one... They may be funny.  Smart.  Kind.  But if you aren't dating anymore...should you be friends? It's complicated, right? Today, I give you some questions and thoughts that you will want to answer before you decide to make the decision if being friends with your ex is a helping or hurting. Listen up! 

I don't know about you, this time of year always starts to get me thinking about camp.   When I was 13, I went to summer camp and it turned out to be the most life changing experience of my childhood.   Listen up today as I tell my experience as well as some ridiculous stories about me:) And if you are ready to change your life, join me at the TripleTConference.com!

Without even noticing, introducing people to friends and family can be the natural next step or sabotaging your new relationship.  Do you know which you are doing? Today, I am going to break down three ways to know when it is a great time to introduce a new boyfriend/girlfriend to move your relationship forward.  

We all have times in our life where we want to be adored, cherished, put on a pedestal by someone.  Right? Wrong. I am breaking down today why having that mindset is not helping you or your relationships.

Do you wonder if your weight is keeping you single? I am going to share some of my own personal experiences of dating at my far from perfect weight and mindsets to challenge you to date any size.  

I just read a brilliant study from Harvard about the number one thing that makes us happy and healthy. Can you guess what it is? I am going to tell you and also share a story from my past and what had to happen for me to get to this place.  It's a doozy. If you want to read the Harvard study it is here.

It happens to the best of us.  We are home on a rando Tuesday night and all of a sudden we hear from someone we never thought we would hear from again. What do we do? I am breaking down some theories of why they are there and what to do about it.  

Do the people that you are dating and having relationships with know how to love you?  Treat you?  Are you asking for what you need? If you just laughed out loud...I get you. That is why I am breaking down today why getting Vulnerable is not optional it is mandatory if you want a relationship that works! Also, check out the No Cheese Left Behind Retreat!

Hell has not frozen over...I just had a stellar talk with my retreat participants and decided that we have a smart talk about online dating. Not what picture to put up or what to write in your profile but mindsets and strategies to keep you sane! Listen up as I breakdown how you might be unconsciously sabotaging your online dates and how to do it better!

On a regular basis I hear ladies saying...chivalry is dead.  I pretty much have to agree, but I think that overall, we have killed. I know...bold statement. Listen in as I explain why I think that and what we can do about it.    

was in tears multiple times this past weekend. I sat back in awe as I watched women all over the world stand up for what they believe. It confirmed what I already knew...that women who stand together can change the world. And there is a lot of change needed. As a life coach who works with singles, I am constantly blown away by the powerful women I see who rock their jobs/businesses, have strong, beautiful friendships, are raising thoughtful children and yet struggle with self worth and giving away their power in dating and relationships. That shit breaks my heart.   I want to take that power, that beautiful fucking vibe that flowed through the world this weekend, and have a conversation on how we keep it going. In the small ways, on a day to day basis, in your everyday life, not just in the overall fight to stick up for what you believe (which you should totally keep doing too), but for the every day culture of women. Listen as I break down today on how to do this!

So we are here in Costa Rica and my shit is coming up for me. So I am going to tell you a story about my fears and what I am doing about them. And when you are done listening, create your own LOAS Fuck It List and share it! Also, say fuck it and join me in Costa Rica in March!

Cause we do.   Seriously. If you are confused, listen as I breakdown why listening to love advice isn't working for us anymore and what to do instead.

So I tend to: a) have a lot of feelings. b) express them a lot. Anyone else? So today I breakdown what to do when we express our thoughts, feelings, etc and it doesn't go over well.  And what the hell to do about it.

A lot is happening over here for me.   Huge life changes that are super exciting...yet I am super nervous. Listen in as I breakdown why I am nervous and what it has to do with love.   K

Gather around for story time! Today, I share a story from my past where I made mistakes to prevent you from making the same ones. A few years ago, I was struggling with figuring out why I was having such trouble with guys until I figured out that my type sucked! Listen in as I tell you what I did about it and how you can make sure your "type" is working for you!

This week has been rough around here and I have some things to say...with quite a bit of swearing. Something's gotta give, everybody. Today I breakdown how we all have to start fixing this shit around us and it all begins with love.   Listen up, Hot Pants!

They mean so well...they really do! But we have to be very, very careful about who we let give us advice about relationships and dating. Because between you and me....a lot of it sucks. Listen today, as I break down who to listen to and who is cramping your style...  

After nine years of coaching and working with single women, there is one thing I know to be true...that without even knowing it so many women are giving away their power, worth and confidence ever single day. But it doesn't have to be that way. Today, I break down what this looks like and what to do instead.  Because we can't make chicken salad out of chicken shit!  

WELL….FUCK.   No matter how much you love the holidays, when you are single there are some just some annoying as fuck parts to it that it can downright tarnish your jingle bells.   So, today, I am going to cut through the crap and just talk mindsets and strategies to just get through it.  Through the obnoxious relatives, awkward parties and just overall grinchy moments that make the holidays less than stellar when you are single. Let's grab the holidays by the jingle bells...  

Nothing sucks worse than when you are feeling down in the dumps, not sure why you are single and someone says to you "you can't find love until you love yourself". ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME??? If that is true, then we might as well go grab our wine and netflix and give up, right? Nope.  Today, I am going to break down what that REALLY means and how we can hack it a little. Sound good?

Oh witty banter. I used to be hooked on it like a drug. But at one point, I realized that my snark was hurting, not helping me create healthy relationships. Listen to my story today on how why I used to be funnier and why I changed.

Last night I was a shit show. There was whining, crying, a mild temper tantrum and so much more. In my former life, I would have lost my shit and feared that it was too much. That I had fucked it up.  That it was over.   But things are different now and I am going to tell you how. And if you are ready to make this different, join me in the next Owner's Manual class. Check it out here!

It's happens to the best of us. Even if we are out there trying, dating, mating all of the things, a lot of the time we keep a plan b.  Someone on the other end of the computer/phone who will text us when we are feeling lonely or need a little attention. Today, I share my personal story about my plan b and how I finally gave it up to create an awesome relationship! Don't forget to join me Sunday night for my free class! Sign-up here!

I am celebrating my two year anniversary soon and as a recovering fixer and super independent, this is a big deal for me. But there was a moment in the beginning that I know can see was a turning point for me.  If I wouldn't have been able to speak up and get past it, we probably wouldn't be here today. I am going to share that story today and if you want to learn how to ask for what you need in a relationship, join me in the Owner's Manual Class in October! Join me here.

Confession time...did you know I am a recovering fixer? Yup.  It used to be a major problem. But not only did it not get me to the relationship I wanted, it ultimately made me an asshole. Let me break down for you why it's important to not date for potential and why you need to change it. Plus, work on changing it in the next Owner's Manual Class with me.   Check it out here.

Hey there Hot Pantses! Today I am talking about one of my favorite topics when it comes to dating and relationships.  Making decisions out of love or fear. So many things we say in the name of love are not actually love at all. I will be breaking down the difference today and give you something to think about. Don't forget to check out our trips at LOAS Travel!

Oh Hot Pants... I am channeling some Pat Benatar today and am All Fired UP! Let's talk about this scary word "settling" and what it REALLY means.   Trust me, I have some big thoughts that are going to change the way you think of settling.  Who's excited! Don't forget there are a couple of spots left to my Costa Rica retreat in Feb, 2017.  Check it out here.

If you are single, you have a job to do.  Maybe you didn't know that...but I am here to tell you the truth! Your job, as I break it down on the podcast today, is to know understand what your true goal is in love. Is it crazy chemistry? A long-term relationship? The whole kit and kaboodle? That's great!  Then are you living a life and making choices to get there? I am laying it down today.  Join me.

GHOSTING!!!! I pretty much think it is the bane of our existence in dating.   Dramatic, maybe.  Untrue?  Nope. Ghosting is pretty much crap for lots of reasons...I wrote the article about that here. But today I break down the REAL reason that ghosting is a problem for everyone! Check it out!

We have apologies, announcements, haikus, jedi mind tricks, everything all over this episode. But if there is one thing it is....it is real. Because it is my goal to start doing more podcasts and just sharing my knowledge.  Even if it sounds awkward... You're welcome. Check out the new singles travel site and join me in Costa Rica! http://loastravel.com/

I have been known to buy a ticket on the crazy train once or twice:) Listen up as I breakdown the difference about truths vs stories in our heads and how they can affect our new relationships.   Oh, and I share a "Kira being ridiculous" story to help you learn.  My pain, your gain. You're welcome...:) Want to join me in Greece?  Otherwise, find out info about the Owner's Manual Class here or work with me one-on-one!  

Shit just got real. I think when we are dating and all things seem lovely and everyone is on their best behavior, we forget about the shit. The bad days. The rough times. The days we are just not fucking winning at life. This is a story about those times:)

No, I am not trying to be a super downer.   I am a life coach for God’s sake.  I think we know I am am mostly rainbows, unicorns with a side of sugar cookies.  The good kind. With sprinkles. But we are not fucking around here, people.  Love is too amazing to be messed with. Today I am going to shake shit up by letting you know why you immediately need to stop looking for love and what you need to do instead. Listen here.

Why are all so fucking hard on ourselves?  Seriously, that shit is killing us! Today, I breakdown why that feeling not only sucks but is pretty much the biggest (love) sabotage ever. I also give you three ways to start getting past all of that.

Seriously....stop doing that shit. Today I am going to break down the two reasons people have relationships and which one is killing you (Hint: it's the "complete me" reason)...cause I am good like that.

Bringing it down for a minute today... Listen up as I share my very first theory about love and it just might change your life.  Seriously!  Would I lie to you? Your adventure for today:  Journal the shit out of these questions. When was the last time you just showed up as completely you and made someone feel really, really special?  Leaving the worries behind. When have you approached someone with a child-like curiosity and collected their stories like fireflies?  Gone slow enough to get to know all of them and just embrace them for exactly who they are? What does special feel like to you? Have you cleared away the baggage enough to feel it?

OH SHIT. It is gettin' real today.  Real good, that is. Today is a big ass reality check about no matter how much you bitch about it over wine, are you actually ready for love? Listen up as I break down my thoughts on how to detect about whether or not you are even ready for love if someone great shows up.

Oh shit. It is gettin' real today.  Real good, that is. Today is a big ass reality check about (complicated) dating over 35 and what we need to do about it. Listen up as I break down my thoughts on settling, divorce and dating with kids.  It's smart, but a doozy.

Want a psychic?  Hire one. Want a relationship?  You effin' create. Men aren't mindreaders. Listen up as I break down how we need to stop believing that people love us more if they can read our minds. That is looney tunes and kicking your ass...

I have a friend and she wrote a book.   It is all kinds of genius. I have her on today as my first ever guest, Andrea Owen, talking about everything you need to know about closure, effed-up relationships and how to get over them. You want to listen.....immediately. Find Andrea's free chapters and bonus items here and make sure to get on over to amazon and pick up your copy today!

Don't you wish you had a crystal ball to see in the future if your new relationship will all work out? Well you can't so get over that shit now.  However, there are very tell tale signs of people who aren't really ready for a healthy relationship right now. Listen up as I break down  five different personalities that you you should run (not walk) away from.....immediately!  

Can men and women be friends? It is one more in the Kira Chronicles where I am sharing my own mistakes and heartaches for your learnin'.  You're welcome. Listen up as I talk today about my own personal story of thinking I knew what love was and being absolutely and completely wrong.

Sometimes we like to pretend, don't we? Pretend that we have all of our shit together and have everything all figured out.  You and I both know that is bullshit, right? Listen up as I talk today about my own personal story of being too awesome and it biting me in the ass.

So I spent a lot of my life waiting for love to find me.... It took me a long time to realize that I was the one pushing it away by just not asking for it! Listen up as I talk today about a personal story that left me with a huge a-ha moment and changed the way I look at love and relationships.

I can not lie, we believe a lot of crap when it comes to love. Ideas that keep us super duper safe and making excuses of why love is not working for us. Listen up as I talk today about dating myths that even the smartest of smarties are buying into and is kicking your ass.  It's a good one.

Sometimes we blame lots of the bad stuff on love. True story. We allow shitty behavior to happen and call it love although it has NOTHING to do with it. Listen up as I talk today about why that isn't love and what you can do about it. Your Adventure for Today: WHEN YOU ARE IN THAT “SICK TO YOUR STOMACH” UNHAPPY FEELING (IN ANY KIND OF RELATIONSHIP), I WANT YOU TO ASK YOURSELF IF YOU ARE STICKING AROUND BECAUSE OF LOVE OR FEAR AND WHAT YOU CAN DO TO START CHANGING THAT.

Dating can be complicated...... However, there are small mindsets that can make it all quite a bit easier and the dating jedi or ninja you secretly know you are. So grab your light saber or black belt and listen in as they are laid out in this 10 minutes of genius I made just for you. Cause I sure think you are awesome.

Rejection sucks. But what if that last rejection was actually not about you?  Or really any of them for that matter.... Here are my pretty darn smart thoughts on the way we love and why we can't really take a break-up so stinkin' seriously. Plus, you are going to get to here about a somewhat-ridiculous, personal kamikaze mission I did myself.  Listen up, Chachi!  Your Adventure for Today: When you find yourself in a new possible relationship that doesn’t feel right, step back and ask if you are uncomfortable because someone is treating you badly or because this is a new type love you haven’t experienced before. Ask yourself: is this healthy? If it is, keep on giving it a chance.

Stupid fear. Sometimes we are pretty darn good at convincing ourselves that our excuses are the real reason we don't have a relationship. "We just didn't have instant chemistry." "I am not going to settle!" Those look like you are taking care of yourself but really....they are fear.  Here are my thoughts on it.   Your Adventure for Today: Journal on these questions. Do you want love?   Do you want a relationship?   Do you want it more than the fear of rejection?   What are you doing to change it?

Occasionally, life hits us over the head with an idea over and over again until we figure it out. That is what this podcast was for me. Listen in on how this mind-blowing idea will change the way you date.  I am serious....it is that good. YOUR ADVENTURE OF THE DAY: What could you begin doing differently when meeting new people to start things the way you want them to end? BONUS: I am going to share a song by one of my favorite artists from college, David Wilcox. I woke up with this song in my head and it was the smack that I needed to get this idea out to you. He talks a little in the beginning about how bad his first date went with his wife and how it's badness created the wonderful relationship they have now. I don't necessarily suggest this kind of honesty for a first date, but I do believe being who you are, in all of your imperfect awesomeness, is always the best answer.

They may not even know they are doing it, but people love attention. However, it is your job to make sure you are not just giving it away and getting nothing in return.  Left angry, frustrated and confused. Listen in on how to tell if something is using you for attention and what the hell to do about it!  YOUR ADVENTURE OF THE DAY: How are you teaching people to treat you when you first meet them?  Are you bending over backwards and are you willing to do that for the rest of the relationship?  Are you starting how you want it to finish?  Are you showing how you like to communicate?  Solve problems?  Be loved?  If not, then how are they supposed to know and be amazing for you?

Seriously, it might be a problem. No you dirty birdies, I am not talking about orgasms!  Get your head out of the gutter.  What would your mother think?! I am talking about how I get up every day and fake most parts of my life.  Definitely this business, but plenty of other stuff too. Listen in on how and why I fake it every day and how it can work for you too.  Especially when it comes to love.  I am serious!   YOUR ADVENTURE OF THE DAY: Stop overthinking everything and start letting go of the outcome so you can just enjoy the deliciousness of the journey.  Stop looking for things to “fit” into your idea of perfect and the way they are supposed to look.  Look at how you can change your perspective to see everything as a success instead of a frustration.  How can you fake it until you get the hang of it?

Seriously, stop doing it. It is so beneath you. What do I mean? Here is what I mean. I regularly get to talk to really smart and amazing singles. However, sometimes we start to talk about a past situation they are stuck on or a mediocre situation that is still hanging around in the air like a bad cheese smell and the smart and amazing gets thrown out the window. They all of a sudden get that whiney sound in their voice and say something usually like “I know they are {fill in totally crappy quality}…but I just still like them. I don’t know why!” At that moment, my inner life coach starts to silently cry in the fetal position in frustration. Listen to some smart stuff on why this is kicking your ass and what to do about it!  Here is my friend Rob that I talked about in the podcast.  He is brilliant.   YOUR ADVENTURE OF THE DAY: Journal on these questions. *What stories are you telling yourself that is holding you back from real love? *What stories have you made up about your past relatiobships (good or bad) that just aren’t true? *What is so wrong with just real you and real life? *What would happen if we just lived and loved fully?

Truly, it is easy peasy. I believe that if there is one thing I have learned in this awesomesauce journey of being a life coach for singles, it is that we make many parts of meeting people and starting relationships WAY MORE COMPLICATED than we have to. We are all so stinkin' scared of getting hurt that we are creating weird ass lists, rules and games to pretty much guarantee no one is getting close to us.  EVER! Check out the easy way to do this without making an ass of yourself.  Your Adventure of the Day: Super easy.  Commit to letting guys know you are interested for the greater good of dating and making sure you don't end up on the crazy train.  

True Story. I realize that I am cotton candy and rainbows most of the time, but this podcast is about hard-core truths! Quit your whining...there is some really good stuff here today! Listen in as Kira drops some knowledge on the difference between love and relationships and which one you should be looking for. Also, a mindset that will help you move into better relationships when you find them. It's pretty good stuff, promise. Your Adventure of the Day: Take a step back and look at your relationship role models.  What did you learn?  Is it going to help you create a good relationship?  Who can be your new relationship role models?  What are they doing to create something that lasts?  What can you start working on today to get yourself ready? Can I help?  

WARNING!!!  I may have been a little salty on this podcast and pretty....let's use the word frustrated, shall we? It is just such an important topic and one that we all need to hear and talk about.  So please ignore my feistiness if it offends, but hear the message behind it.  It is a doozy. Listen below to this feisty, frustrated, saltiness that is all meant with love:)   Your Adventure of the Day: Everyone has something to teach you and even if you have dug in a little and are seeing some differences that aren’t going to work, everyone has a story you can learn from.  The moment you embrace that, this dating thing is going to get a whole lot better.  You might even be amazed what you find out. Go out this week and collect stories.  Open up your child-like curiosity and just listen.  Learn.  and more importantly understand.  Because when we understand who people are and where they are coming from that is where love and kindness and a whole lot of amazing can grow. Get on this.  

We all have had the moments when we are out there dating and all of a sudden are asking ourselves... WTF?! I mean really...why do guys do that? Listen to my latest podcast that lays down some truth bombs about what to do when we get stuck in that WTF place. Your Adventure of the Day: Journal on these questions and feel free to share your answers below. Create a list of all of the WTF’s in your life.  Whether they are with someone you are seeing, friends, family or even co-workers.  If you are not ok with it, how are you going to teach them to treat you?  What are you going to tell them you need? What can you do in return?  

Well shit! I blogged about this a while ago, but it needed to be said.  Out loud.  To the masses.   Yes, I am being dramatic. I can't even try to tell you how many times I hear the stories.  "We had a couple of dates, I was interested and then I never heard from them again!"   I mean, what? What about dating nowadays says that you don't need to let someone know you are interested? That letting them hang there, wondering what the heck happened, has become ok?   I am on a mission to change this and I want your help! Let's pull the crazy train in the station, shall we? Today's podcast is the importance or changing this and then HOW to do it. Today's hard core truth:  When you are dating, there are going to be freak outs & awkward moments, but we HAVE to remember to be kind to each other. Your Adventure of the Day: Today, is easy.  Just commit to help make the change.  Understanding that with this basic kindness comes more love.  Then....SPREAD THE WORD!  40 people doing this is a change, but what about 400 or 4000?  What would that mean for dating today?   How would everything look if we all just were a little kinder to each other. Need help?   Here is a script for you to follow when that awkward moment happens. Script for letting someone down easy “I just want to tell you thank you so much for the time we have spent together.  I have to be honest that I am not wanting to move this forward and just don’t feel it is what I am looking for right now.  I  have really loved getting to know you and truly appreciating getting a glimpse into your life.  I wish you the best of luck." No you can fucking do that... 

Oh, the heart. It plays such an important role in love.... It leads you towards love and even breaks a little when it is over. OR DOES IT??? Listen to my latest podcast that lays down some truth bombs about the heart and all of it's wily ways.   Today's hard core truth:  We can't always help who we are attracted to, but we DO get to choose if they stay in our life. Your Adventure of the Day: Journal on these questions and feel free to share your answers below. What bad behavior and excuses are you blaming on the heart? Where are you victimizing yourself so that you can’t move forward towards love?     

So you say you want a relationship.   Ok, why?   When was the last time you sat down and really asked yourself that question? It is something I ask every potential client and many of them don’t have the answer.  It is just assumed as the next step in so many people’s lives.  But if you have no idea what you are looking for how will you know when you have found it?   Today, I am going to break down some thoughts for you on what is going to point you in the healthy direction of a relationship and what is going to lead you to the same crap situation.  

It is 2014.  Things are different than ever before And you have to be ready. Today, I breakdown one thing we are forgetting about love and relationships nowadays and is the most important thing.  Let me know if you agree. Here is the original Psychology Today article.

One day, I woke up and didn’t want to date unavailable men anymore and I had to have a tough moment where I needed to fess up to myself that it was ME choosing them.  Again and again. I was the one buying the ticket to the crazy train and that shit was on me. Today, I break down what I have learned about why I was dating unavailable men and how I changed it. Learn from my mistakes, grasshopper.

Fucking trust. It comes up a lot with my clients. And why wouldn’t it?  Let’s be honest, there are a lot of shit relationships out there and if you have been dating for awhile there is a pretty good chance you have been in at least one. You probably have even caught yourself saying "I feel like I can't trust anyone."  But today I break down that is not about them, Sugarpants.  That shit is all about you. Listen here.